Writing a novel, but don't want anyone to know

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8 Comments

I am an aspiring novelist, working on a story that I hope to get published. I am serious about this goal: I have organized notes for various book ideas; I have the plot line of my current novel mapped out, and a draft halfway done; and I'm constantly researching proper procedure for how to get yourself published.

What I can't seem to find any information on is, how *private* is the average writer, before they are ready to send their story to an editor?

I have not told anyone that I am working on a novel, and am terrified of friends or family finding out. I used to talk about wanting to write books when I was a kid, but not anymore. Now, when friends or family ask me about it, I get extremely angry; usually, the people most eager to talk about it are the absolute LAST people I want to talk about it with.

I realize that my fears may be irrational; I am medicated for anxiety, and medication only does so much.

I have many fears about people finding my story drafts before they are ready to be seen. My mother, who is a very controlling and mentally unstable person, might take it upon herself to "help" me, by sending my draft to a publisher behind my back, before it is ready. Or trying to "help" me "get in touch" with a publisher. My mother lives five minutes away from me. I am trying very hard to move to another city, to escape her, but moving is very hard. As for my friends, I'm just afraid of them babbling all my story ideas online and in public, which could lead to embarrassment and/or stolen ideas.

By no comparison, this issue of privacy is causing more problems for me than any other problems a writer is supposed to face put together. My dream is to relocate to a safe peaceful place where I can work on my book un-bothered.

Is this a difficulty that all first-time writers face? Or is this something that only happens when you have an anxiety disorder coupled with a mentally ill mother?

Voting Results
82% Normal
Based on 22 votes (18 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • wistfulmaiden
    9 years ago

    I have written stories and drafts of a novel and I didn't tell anyone and Id have been mortified if anyone would have read them. I even intended to use a pseudonym if I published...sadly I gave up on that a while ago.
    I think its pretty normal, don't give up like I did.

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  • daydreamer394
    9 years ago

    You're not the only one :) Good luck!

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    I have a book that teaches you how to write a book and also, if I'm remembering correctly, teaches you how to get your book published. I bought it at Barnes and Noble.

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  • deadtea
    9 years ago

    I think in your case it's normal. I also hate when someone sees my unfinished work because I know my sketches look terrible sometimes and I feel ashamed of over half of my doodles while only some get published online. Even if they're not that bad, I'm just pretty critical toward myself and that's perfectly normal, even healthy if you ever want to improve. Although remember that a lot of people will have good intentions even if you don't want them to help or appreciate you at that moment. Remember that simply to not hurt them and to not waste an opportunity to get the help you need. Always explain how you feel about things and actions so they can have a chance to understand you.

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    • NobodyKnows
      9 years ago

      Thanks for the input!

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  • [Old Memory]
    9 years ago

    I like to write stories, make music and draw and while i like to show off what i make i dont like showing anybody until i am done, for similar reasons. I dont want unwanted remarks about what i already know or people sharing my unfinished work. It is also irritating to hear nagging critism on something I already know isn't done. A lot of people do those annoying things and it makes me not want to show them. Also I get people who beg to be a part of what I am doing when their help and input is not wanted.

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    • NobodyKnows
      9 years ago

      Thanks for the input! I too have that fear of people wanting to get "involved" in a project. I feel like an egotistical prick thinking that they'd want to. But even so I worry about it.Glad to know it's not just me.

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      • [Old Memory]
        9 years ago

        I have one friend who nags me about unfinished details in new songs I am working on when I am already aware of it. It drives me nuts and makes me not want to show off stuff that is unfinished which is unfortunate because it takes me so long to complete things I like to show off what I am working on but am annoyed at comments on obvious details. I think it mostly annoys me when somebody presists going on about it rather than a simple comment. Some people do not shut up. Another time I sent the same guy an mp3 of a new unfinished song and he put some shitty recordings over it to "complete" it and put it on youtube, which pissed me off because I don't like releasing anything with shitty quality.

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