Would you date a man with kids?

I disagree.

There are men out there who are single fathers due the mother cheating, a drug addict, abusive, or simply leaving her own family (I have a friend whose mom left him and her oldest son with their father, because she wanted a new start); they're just not mentioned as much as the many tales of the struggling single mothers and the men who abandon their families.

Rather than generalizing and refusing to date a single father out of fear of being 2nd place, just use common sense and do your best to judge his character and intentions, as well as see if you're ready to be a parent.

As for the question, yeah. If I were single, and met a wonderful man who happen to be a single father and I'm at the stage in life where I don't mind raising children, I'll definitely give dating him a try.

Sometimes I think they are definitely over the kids' mother, but there is often a lot of drama. I wouldn't want to date a man with kids because I wouldn't want to have to raise the kids.

Yeah, I honestly think you make a lot of valid points. I kinda see it as I prefer to be with someone who doesn't have kids, because I don't have kids, and I would prefer to be with someone who is in the same life stage and status as myself. I like feeling equal, compatible and that I'm on the same ground as my partner. Maybe if I had kids I would prefer someone else who also had kids. It's your life and you have a right to your own preferences.

I think it's an irrational fear.

Most relationships are officially over and not happening again once they really finally split for any period of time. Like Tealights said, there are some vile people (men and women) out their who treat their partners and children so badly that there's no chance of reconciliation, or even shared custody. I also know a girl whose mother walked out on her father when she was a baby for "new start".

For most though, the fathers would probably maintain a purely platonic relationship with the mother, for the sake of passing the children back and forth between them in shared custody. That is something that you are going to have to deal with. If you date a single father, then unless the mother was a complete monster with no custody rights, you are going to hear about her and probably even meet her at some point. Know what you're getting into, if you're the irrational paranoid jealous type, he's not for you.

I think it's a generalization that the man will be attached to the mother of his kids... not always. He may have to have some contact with her, but that doesn't mean he's attached. Maybe he is and maybe not. I think you'd have to go on a case by case basis unless you just don't want the kids around also then please don't date a man with kids.

I won't date a woman with kids because I'm afraid of what happens if I get attached to the kids and then we break up