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When someone does something to disappoint you, do you blame them for doing something that made you feel that way, or yourself for expecting too much of them, and consequently being disappointed when they do something below your expectations?
| I consider it my fault | 21 | |
| I consider it their fault | 23 | |
| Depends | 27 | |
| Both | 9 | |
| Neither | 3 | |
| Other | 3 |
Disappointment quickly morphs into oh that's right, I don't give a shit. Moving on...
I try not to expect too much from people in general. This way I don't get disappointed when people let me down. I have a tendency to blame myself before I will blame others. (I should know better.) Although sometimes I think having a negative attitude about it tends to make your thoughts become real. Like the time I knew a friend would fuck me over. I couldn't get the thought out of my head, saw it coming and put up defenses before they were needed. So of course they were needed.
I am realistic about people's abilities and am stubbornly independent. I assume I have to do everything myself and am grateful when someone lends a hand or offers support. I generally refuse to ask for help unless it's a silly request. Like asking a stranger at the grocery store to grab something off the top shelf for me.
Depends. One year my mom said she would spend christmas with me. It then changed to "I might only get the one day off, still want me to come?" Then escalated into "Maybe I shouldn't come." I was a sad kid that year :C I blamed my mom, but she became very well known to me as I grew older as someone who doesn't show up when they say they will. That turned into me being hard on myself for even getting excited and believing she'd come. That got real deep right there ^^^
This is an idiotic poll. Each situation is different. Like if I'm disappointed I didn't get a job I wanted, I blame myself. If I'm disappointed there's not going to be another season of Game of Thrones, do I blame myself? No.
It depends. What really disappoints me is being ignored, and I worry it's something I did. Or, if it's a guy I like, I worry he likes Kate Nash. I don't expect an explanation, except if anyone I know likes her more than me, then yes I do think they owe me one.