Where do you fixate when talking to someone?

22 Comments

This has probably been discussed before (although I wouldn't doubt the repetition of every post on here), but here it is.

When I'm talking to someone, I expect the person to look at my eyes. I didn't think that was too much to ask, but for some it apparently is.
What I guess you would call a pet peeve of mine would be when people fixate on a certain part of my face. Usually I don't care where they're looking, if it's not my eyes, it bugs me. Especially~~when I have acne in one area or something else is on my face.

It's like they're judging me and they're not going to tell me until I figure out myself later looking at the mirror that there was a huge piece of lettuce in my teeth!

I would've put this as a is it normal post but I was a little curious to see if people would actually confess as to whether or not they fixate on different parts of people's faces.

Oh and also, for those who don't even look at the person's face when talking to them, just no. Stop.

Teeth	2
Eyes	29
Lips	5
Chin	0
Acne	0
I don't even look at the person	8
Other (comment)	2

Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!

[ Report Post ]

Comments ( 22 )

green_boogers

9 years ago

I like it when women try to pry their eyes away from the bulge in my pants. My empatheticly cheerful demeanor usually helps them to feel accepted.

Comment Hidden ( show )

2

2
[Old Memory]

9 years ago

groin

Comment Hidden ( show )

2

2
- WishIWasHere
  
  9 years ago
  
  Hows that workin for ya
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  1
  
  1
  - [Old Memory]
    
    9 years ago
    
    2 black eyes
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
ChaoticBunny

9 years ago

Well, it depends on the person. If I'm comfortable with someone, I usually look into their eyes (not staring though) and if its someone I first met or don't know that well, I stare at my feet like their the most fascinating things in the world. Lol

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
Avant-Garde

9 years ago

It honestly depends. If they have lovely eyes, I might look there. If there teeth are the shade of colour that I hate to see on teeth, I might end up looking there out of bafflement. Sometimes, I'll look at clothing or at something else. With the latter, it worries me that I may come off as rude and I have even had people ask me what I was looking at.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- Avant-Garde
  
  9 years ago
  
  Chest not a particularly good idea, especially if the person I am talking to is female and has large, prominent breasts. I wouldn't want them to get an off coloured impression of me.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
loopoo

9 years ago

Don't look at them, I must look like such an idiot

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Nah. As long as you aren't being offensive, you're not rude or an idiot. If you can't help it, you can't help it.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
Cucco

9 years ago

I can't look at a person's face. My eyes wander downwards or to the side because I'm always nervous when talking to someone. Just can't do it.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  We all get nervous. It's okay. It's better than if you were not interested in the conversation/person. You're totally fine.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
Shrunk

9 years ago

when talking to someone, goes between their eyes, things behind/next to them (so as not to make it awkward), when they're talking to me, mostly i look at their lips, eyes, space next to them, or whatever i'm working on at the time

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
WishIWasHere

9 years ago

I usually look at the eyes. Unless it happens to be a female then my eyes wander to her lips. I don't know why. I blame it on me being a male.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  I notice a fair amount of people that do that to me when I'm talking. It doesn't bother me that much, but if they stare for too long or keep glancing too much it can be a little distracting.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
kingofcarrotflowers

9 years ago

I think I'm pedantic when it comes to things like this, quite often I'll be doing something during a conversation so I'll intermittently make eye contact but if I'm facing the person I overanalyze where to look

All this goes through my head during the situation

if I look into the other persons eyes for too long it could either make them feel uncomfortable or look like I've zoned out, but if I look away its rude, even if I briefly look away it would make me seem disinterested, but, there is such a thing as too much eye contact.

During a conversation I'm painfully aware of how much I'm thinking about where I should look.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
PureLikeSnow

9 years ago

Eyes, otherwise I feel like I'm disrespecting who I'm talking to or they think I'm lying about something.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
LornaMae

9 years ago

Eyes, eyes, eyes! I focused on a set of eyes all afternoon (to keep myself from looking at the torn jeans on the crotch, really.....)

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
[Old Memory]

9 years ago

I love looking into people's eyes when I talk to them... in a non-creepy way because I take little breaks every couple of seconds.

Funnily, I remember someone once told me that when I made eye contact with them it spooked them because of the colour of my eyes. Normally I get compliments about their colour, but she was actually afraid of them. She thought I could read her mind or steal her soul or some shit. Oh well! hahaha

Did you know
that many people with Aspergers have a difficult time reading facial expressions because they focus more on a person's nose or mouth instead of their eyes? Interesting stuff.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- charli.m
  
  9 years ago
  
  Precisely this with the Aspie stuff. It's not a conscious decision. Saying "just no. Stop." is incredibly ignorant.
  
  Also for various social anxiety reasons and probably others, people might not be able to handle the intensity of prolonged eye contact.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    9 years ago
    
    I wasn't gearing it towards anyone with Aspergers or anyone who feels socially anxious. Trust me, I've been there.
    I apologize for not being more clear.
    
    I was talking about the people who do not focusing on the person while being talked to because they are uninterested or feel as if they're wasting their time.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
    - [Old Memory]
      
      9 years ago
      
      Ah, no worries! :D
      
      I was only pointing it out because I thought it was interesting stuff. charli.m does make a good point, though, that some people cannot help it...
      But, that's not what you meant---you're talking about the people who do it out of a lack of manners. For sure, those people are being rude.
      
      As for myself, I'm a highly visually orientated person, so I find certain attributes about people's faces quite distracting. I have to make a concentrated effort to not look because I want to avoiding making them feel uncomfortable. I think a lot of people manage this too.
      Yeah, it's just a consideration thing, isn't it?
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      2
      
      2
      - Anonymous Post Author
        
        9 years ago
        
        Yes, I did not know about that until you commented about it; I think it's interesting as well.
        
        I was talking from experience is all.
        On another note, I knew this post would be a little harder to discuss because it's focusing more on the readers faults rather than others which can be more difficult for some.
        
        I can see where you're coming from. It's also difficult for someone to ask the person why they are looking at them in that way without it sounding a little strange. Just relax your eyes a little more and think less of their facial features and more their words. I appreciate you sharing your fixation. Thanks for understanding. :)
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        0
        
        0

Are You Normal?

Where do you fixate when talking to someone?