When was the last time someone yelled at you?

I thought I already had but anyway, here goes & I'll try & keep it brief ....

I was raped nearly 5 years ago by someone I'd been having a very short 4 1/2 week fling with. The cops didn't charge him with rape but I was able to get a 3 years Intervention Order, which he didn't defend and which I've since renewed. I also got the maximum compensation from the state victims (hate that word!) of crime tribunal, which included funding for a home security system and a watchdog. I had excellent free counselling at a Centre Against Sexual Assault for about 2 years and am still in contact with them when I need support.

We both still live in the same town and basically he's stayed away from me except when there are no witnesses around, occasionally slowing down & doing u-turns near me when I'm walking the dog & similar petty childish stuff, but nothing reportable, and I'd learned to just shrug, ignore him and get on with my day whenever this happened.

Then just before xmas last year he tried to run me over in the street with his truck - of course, there were no witnesses or he wouldn't have done it. The cops have refused to charge him with breaching the Intervention Order and I've had to deal with a reactivation of all the post rape PSTD symptoms. I'm on a pension plus casual work so I can't afford civil action against him for the breach of the order and there's no legal aid available for this.

That's pretty much it: I'm slowly accepting that this will go on until one of us dies or leaves town, which I would find impossible to do for financial reasons. He's been getting away with this sort of behaviour towards women and also young girls for 40 years, which of course I didn't know until after he'd raped me. He's also strongly suspected of being involved in the murder of at least two women who've gone missing in the area over the years. He's been charged exactly ONCE years ago and the woman dropped it and left town after he rammed her car with his truck - no witnesses, of course.

What still totally shocks me is that a few local women who KNOW his history still recommend him to other women (he's a self-employed tradie) and one woman has been known to hide him at her place when the cops are looking for him. I've also been told bullshit such as "karma will take care of him" - yeah, right, I'd like to be his karma or that I can protect myself by writing his name on a piece of paper & putting it in my freezer - newage bullshit ..... putting HIM in a freezer would be good if I could work out how to do it.

That's about it, not a happy story and no happy ending in sight. I have bad days where I can't leave the house because of fear, but mostly good days where I hold my head high and enjoy where I live and the many good people in this town.

Thanks for reading this far!