What would you do to the human race if you were an alien?

Rape, lots and lots of rape.

Abduct lots of beautiful women and "probe" them

Kill all the terrorists, rapists, child molestors, and serial killers. I would blow several countries off the map and create a new race of people.

Conquer everything to further the glory of my home planet and then plant the flag into the corpse of some hapless stranger as I speak something along these lines to the masses-

"My name is Lantine and I am imbued with glorious purpose. To set you all free from this so-called 'freedom' and to protect you from any invader that might threaten your new found peace.

And how do you repay me for this kindness?

By trying to kill my ilk?! Shall I not deal harshly with you? Shall I not show you my justice?"

Aye, what a day that would be :')

i would simply exterminate them, they look like microbes gone out of control, so i would do the most practical thing for the health of the planet.

I'd be puzzled by their disconnection from the planet they live on and I'd try to communicate with the billions of other species first, who do live in greater symbiosis with nature. When I finally got around to talking to humans I'd probably be too depressed by them to even bother so I'd get back in my spaceship and point it at the next star system.

I'd probably bring a couple of sugar gliders with me, though.

I am an alien already :P

I'd probably just observe. While I have known myself to be negative, I am not a malicious person. I'd observe, study and laugh but I doubt I'd make any contact. Human beings are not ready for it yet. If possible I'd live among them to gain information but I doubt I'd interfere.

Make an alliance. I would try further them in to meeting our species, and others if we have already contacted other species. I would look to unite the species to continue knowledge on the galaxy.

I build a giant secret base in Antarctica.

I'll turn earth into my idea of a perfect society and kill anyone who gets in my way.
...like an extraterrestrial Hitler that operates on a larger scale. (except I'm not after the Jews and won't set up concentration camps - just kill on the spot and dispose of the bodies in space)
...Then become the leader of this society where everything except crime will be allowed and 100% enforced.

I'd bypass Earth and go straight to Omicron Persia 8 (:

I would punish them for the evils they have committed against each other and most important, the planet. Once they were severely punished, I would make them undo the damage they have done to Earth and if it's "irreversible", I'd take a few "evolved" humans and take them to my planet. While the ones left behind would have to find a way to get out of the mess they created...

Exterminate all humankind before they destroy my lovely planet any further than they already have.

I think I would rather be a pet human.

one big congo line!!

I'd probaly enslave the gaudy, rich, and evil then make them build everyone else's home without pay

Lets see I will redesign the world government and become supreme lord dictator and put in to action my utopia design we were given the assignment of making in 9th grade. Honestly I have no idea. why would anyone care about humanity its such a useless petty thing . Most people are petty and psychology has become very boring. Oh what a bore is existence . No I would make monsters and watch the humans fight them in giant arena and teach them to fight the people who lived would be heroes the rest are either watching or dead. However they would not be forced to fight they must volunteer than again that’s still boring. Humans are so boring why is existence so boring.

I would turn tail and space ship my ass out of here before humans discovered me! That is all any other intelligent life form needs, humans and strip malls taking over their planet!

I'd be their friend?

I would keep my distance and abduct a select few and show them the secrets of the universe. Send them back in hopes that they can spread the information among the masses. But I would keep some for pets.

Humans are in fact aliens, we just think we're perfectly formed, hell, we even would think that if we were 8 feet green cone headed things. We are Aliens, this is our galaxy and our dimension.

Big party in the alien spaceship. -probing restricted-

I love turkey, stuffing, potato and gravy so I'm going with that option.

Force everyone to dance in a flash mob to Call Me Maybe. Actually, scratch that. Milli vanilli blame it on the rain. That shiz is the jam.