What would you do if a stranger ran up to you and tried to cut you?

So if you were sitting in a restaurant and a stranger just runs up to and tries to cut you, what would you do?

Run	22
Fight	33
Other	5

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Comments ( 38 )

CalciteQueen

9 years ago

Pick up my chair and ram that motherfucker where it hurts.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Yes ram that attacker up the ass with the legs of the chair. But wait, the attacker might enjoy that...
  
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  - CalciteQueen
    
    9 years ago
    
    Not when he starts haemorrhaging.
    
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[Old Memory]

9 years ago

Well, depends. If they tried to cut my face, I would try keep my distance. If they had already cut my face, well...Something else is going to be added to the restaurant menu.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  And I know just what that something else is. I shall concoct a new flavor of ice cream from the knifer's blood and internal organs. As for the bones, they'll be used to decorate the place to give it that unique and festive holiday spirit look. Thank you for the lovely corpse. I can assure you that no part of it will go to waste.
  
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  - wistfulmaiden
    
    9 years ago
    
    ...Princess Kedders?
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      9 years ago
      
      I am not the Princess of Kedder. I am but another regular user.
      
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kingofcarrotflowers

9 years ago

Politely ask them to stop then return to my steak, nothing interrupts steak

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  But what if they want to use their knife make YOU the steak for the next person that orders it. How can you remain calm when your physical being is at stake? Heck, that "steak" you're eating could be the last victim of this strangers mad knifing spree. Don't take that chance, man.
  
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  - kingofcarrotflowers
    
    9 years ago
    
    Hhmm
    
    Steakception
    
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- Crusades_
  
  9 years ago
  
  Well judging by the way you look, i guess no one interrupted your steak since 1990.
  
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  - kingofcarrotflowers
    
    9 years ago
    
    * rubs eyes *
    
    How'd you know I was eating steaks before my birth!!?
    
    You clever bastard you
    
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    9 years ago
    
    Oh Crusades. You are so sexy. I'd just love to flash you my lovely breast implants while throat fucking you with my thick, meaty cock.
    
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modernism

9 years ago

From your comments, OP, I'm beginning to think that this question is actually just premeditated planning to go all Hannibal on some poor victim...

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Nope. I'm just being my naturally weird self.
  
  *spins around in chair while reciting Twinkle Twinkle Little Star backwards*
  
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[Old Memory]

9 years ago

I'd unload my .38 in them.

Kind of dumb to bring a knife to a gunfight ;)

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Hooray for blood raining down from the knifer's foolish decision. I shall stick out my tounge and taste the blood. Maybe I'll lie in the blood and make little blood angels. The possibilities are endless.
  
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Morgan.Freeman

9 years ago

I would beat the piss out of him.

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zlofton

9 years ago

I would beat the piss out of him and cut him with my concealed switchblade.

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SisterFantasy14

9 years ago

He is trying to kill me or whomever I am with, I would shoot them with the pistol I always have with me.

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GiveMeAFuckingNameAlready!

9 years ago

I don't like to fight but Im no stranger to it. It wouldn't end very well for them.

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wistfulmaiden

9 years ago

probably first reaction would be to punch them in the face then look for something heavy to hit them with.

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Freedom_

9 years ago

I'll make it a sword-like fight with a butter knife. Is anyone else picturing this happening at a buffet?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  If it were at a buffet, chances are the attacker would be too obese to even be able to stab you quick enough.
  
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  - Freedom_
    
    9 years ago
    
    Yes, but chances are also that he is more aggressive and territorial over the steak he is cutting.
    
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[Old Memory]

9 years ago

make him cry for his mother

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Pika-girl

9 years ago

...Take the knife away, if I can, and cut them.
If not, I'll just kick them where the sun don't shine and run.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  Is there a knife concealed in that shoe on the foot you used to kick them with? >:)
  
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  - Pika-girl
    
    9 years ago
    
    ...Mehbeh... ...But that also might mean I can cut my foot, ouch. Anyway, mehbeh (Most likely yes. Great idea, too! Stab him and kick him where it hurts... MWAHAHAHAHA!).
    
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handsignals

9 years ago

Fuck him up.

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Hugh*Janus

9 years ago

I'm the last person they'd try it on.

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donteatstuffoffthesidewalk

9 years ago

I meant to say fuckin shoot em

then flip em the bird

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RoseIsabella

9 years ago

Probably scream and throw hot coffee in the attacker's face then throw down and fight if necessary.

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thegypsysailor

9 years ago

I'm too old to run. I'm certainly not as fast as I was when younger, but I was trained in hand to hand and knife fighting, so I'd hope that my training would kick in.
Hopefully it is a restaurant with tablecloths; that would help. Of course, in the US, I'd probably have a carry permit, so any idiot bringing a knife to a gunfight wouldn't be much of a worry.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  I must know how does a tablecloth count as a weapon?
  
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  - thegypsysailor
    
    9 years ago
    
    Wrap it around an arm as protection, using that arm to fend off the knife while trying to gain the advantage.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      9 years ago
      
      A makeshift shield. I like that.
      
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      - thegypsysailor
        
        9 years ago
        
        Cool.
        
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Are You Normal?

What would you do if a stranger ran up to you and tried to cut you?