What truly defines attractiveness?

7 Comments

Love is indefinitely a complex emotion, but I want to hear everyone's opinion on a certain subject. There is not a doubt in my mind that physical appearance plays a role in a successful relationship, but I propose an alternative idea to simply basing how attractive one is off of their physical appearance. In my case, I can talk to basically anyone; I'm a social butterfly. Please note I am 18 and male if you feel that this may alter the differences in our opinions at the end. Nonetheless, when I want to start talking to someone (whether it be with sexual intention or not), their physical appearance plays a small role - it means little to nothing. Your appearance is nothing more than it sounds, it is only what I can see of you on the outside. When it comes time where I feel I am interested in someone, it has taken me time to see who they truly are, and in the instance where in the beginning I did not think they were very attractive, they become more and more attractive based on the things which I've discovered through talking to them frequently. The idea which I am trying to propose here is on the occasion where you make a friend who is unattractive, if you find things which you like about this individual which is not what you see on the outside, you begin to appreciate their appearance more and more. Do you guys feel the same way? Do you feel that physical attraction correlates with emotional attraction, or do you feel that physical attraction is what it is - there is no other way to address it other than simply "liking what you see"?

Physical Attraction can be acquired. 18
Physical Attraction cannot be acquired. 6
Other (Please comment below) 2
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Jweezee
    9 years ago

    I agree with you that your perception of physical beauty varies greatly depending on personality. My longest relationship, 7 years, was to a woman that wasn't, by society's standards, the image of beauty. It was her personality that made me fall in love. The way she giggled at my stupid jokes, the compassion she had for others, her impressive intelligence and depth of knowledge, the lack of material concern, the selflessness and maturity. Because of her personality I saw her as absolutely beautiful physically. On the other hand, I've dated some women that were fucking gorgeous that ended up disgusting me. They started out as a 10 but the more I learned about them, the self centered behavior, the immaturity, the bullshit games, the intentional ploys of provoking jealousy, the manipulation. By the end I was just repulsed by them. Anyway, I think attraction is simply the appreciation of compatible characteristics in another person. Their idiosyncrasies and appearance become further endearing as a result of that attraction.

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  • Lariii
    8 years ago

    I knew a guy that wasn't my type physically - he dressed way too old for his age, had wild curly hair (it didn't suit him at all) and didn't have clothes that fit right. He was also highly critical and refused to like modern stuff and was always very serious.

    But after talking to him a lot, we ended up flirting and he was the biggest turn on in terms of control and dominance (we would dirty text a lot) and when we met up and pushed through awkwardness, we had awesome foreplay, and even though sexual attraction was there, it took weeks to gradually grow physical attraction.

    I think physical attraction is an initial priority, but over time you like other qualities though and they become physically attractive after getting to know them.

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  • smellypillowgirl
    8 years ago

    Self confidence,big todger,funny,big todger......

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  • flyingnostalgia
    9 years ago

    nothing

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    9 years ago

    Decent working knowledge of cars
    Knows how to shoot
    Good personality
    Understand my sense of humor
    Physically attractive (nice body, nice hair, decent face, pretty eyes), I prefer brown eyes but it's not a go or no go type deal.

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  • Arm0se
    9 years ago

    Didn't read. Too long.

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  • thegypsysailor
    9 years ago

    For me, all my adult life, if a gal was 5'4" or less, somewhat buff and preferably blonde (though this was less important), I was hopelessly in lust. It wasn't something I had any control over.
    I could appreciate the beauty of other women (though I had absolutely no interest in them), but my intense physical and emotional attraction to the short, strong gal was uncontrollable, and often quite visible.
    Until I met my present wife, I hadn't dated any girl over 5'4", since college; something like 45 years.

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