What the heck is wrong with my mind.

There is nothing in consciousness that is not an analog of something that was in behavior first.

Don't turn to a psychologist. I met many adults, when I felt the same way as you 2 years ago, that went through the same stage. This is not depression, it's your "self" developping into adulthood. You feel unique right now, you are looking for an answer for everything there is right in this instant. The only way you can learn to handle your life is by being a thinker, having rational ideas, experimenting with your feelings, adressing a logic out of them.

After you think your way to control your feelings, you'll look at this and say: "I've come a long way, but all the joy and pain are necessary for me to keep walking."

Do you know Freud? Well, he separated our mind among 3 personalities. There are more than that, every wise person, like Hermann Hesse, Friedrich Nietzsche, Arthur Rimbaud, Confucius, knew, controlled and wrote about these voices they heard. It's called being conscious, being concious that your "self" is not the only voice in this world.

"Anything that we are aware of at a given moment forms part of our consciousness, making conscious experience at once the most familiar and most mysterious aspect of our lives."
—Schneider and Velmans, 2007

i am exactly the same as you, dont kno how to help, cant even help myself... went to the doctor they gave me stuff that makes me more calm and less obsessed intrusive thoughts, it makes me not give a shit about anything but i also feel more depressed because i've lost interest in everything, and it doen't work as well as i'd hoped...
i am guessing now that you're 19 you're out of school and don't have as much to occupy your time, too much free time and nothing to do with it but realise how pointless life is, don't even know how to live it... but just remeber some day things will get better, never give up, while you wait you must find something you really like and get totally lost in the fantasy of something so perfect

It's normal in the sense that many people feel like you, but it's not normal as it is affecting your happiness. It sounds very much like depression. Talking therapies such as counselling and cognitive behavioural therapy will help you feel better. Hope you sort out your mind and feel better soon, don't suffer in silence, you're not alone. Xx

Classic signs of depression. Depression is an illness. Given your symptoms I'd say you do have a chemical imbalance and it's not going to go away by itself. You need to see you medical doctor ASAP. He/she can recommend what path your treatment should take. Please remember it is an illness, it is not 'all in your head' as many people assume. The sooner you get help, the sooner you can get your life back. Stop trying so hard to hide it. Having a good support system will be helpful in fighting your illness. Good luck.

Wow ^^ really? Jeeezzzz.... don't do that. It may not feel like it, "-dont worry, someday I promise you will feel at home" it sounds like you are unfulfilled and a bit... jaded on life maybe? Try doing something new, meeting some new people. Don't rely on them for happiness tho. It comes from within. Challenge urself.
Orrr you might just be lonely. Idk.

I just went through what seems to be something at least very similar to what Jurru described. Or it could have been an ulcer, but either way you should tell people how your feeling and be around your friends when you can. It helps a lot! :)

I felt that way too (around the same age)- turns out I had a thyroid disorder. Now I'm less anxious and feel better overall. Worth checking into.

Got at least 2 friends? Do something crazy, out of the ordinary and just plain insane. That always makes me happy :)

hey i know what you mean. i'm the same too. the worst part is i'm a college student and being 'depressed' and not motivated to do anything isn't helping but making things worst. the things is a want to get better but i don't know how nor doi know what it is that's pulling me down.

something that i think when I'm feeling like that or have gone through something difficult is the that "things will always get better"..and it's true!

but by the sounds of it you have been feeling this way for a while so i do reccomend seeing a psychologist
and dont worry about trying to hide your feelings, your friends will be glad to know about this and im sure that they will be very supportive and will hopefuly make an extra effort to make you happy :)

also i think you shouldnt spend so much time online
i find that if im on the computer for too long, i start feeling really depressed and start having thoughts about home lonely i am etc etc
its a fact that depression is linked to the internet
so try to off it for a bit and plan lots of things to look forward to with your friends
right now i find that my close friends is what is keeping me happy

i hope everything works out for you!
good luck!
things will always get better :)

am i the only one who thought this story was to long to read and so i didn't read it?

Definate depression :\

Get more hobbies u like doing!

It's normal, you probably have an existential crisis. I often feel like that too and I found out the best way to stop thinking like that is either doing stuff around the house to keep yourself occupied or listening to music.

Yep it's normal. =)

....sub-consciously need the attention. Thats not abnormal at all. Nor is it a bad thing. We all need love. You will be fine.

Yes it is very normal. Sometimes people complain and worry about things because they don't have anything to complain or worry about. I could be you or it could be your mind. You could even be reacting this way because you "sub-con