What should i do about my suicidal thoughts?

I usually have a stray suicidal thought every now and then that I would absolutely never act on, but lately they are more frequent and extremely intense. They are extremely compulsive and I can't help but feel like I HAVE to end whatever intense dread I am feeling right there and then. I usually wait them out, and then I can get through the day. But they are getting bad. I was very close to trying to overdose in the bathroom today. I know they are stupid and suicide is not worth it, but these intense compulsive moments change my mentality drastically and I don't think logically.

I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and atypical depression a few months ago; however, there are no openings to make an appointment with a psychiatrist until late March (I scheduled this in early December). I can't drive, get a job, or even have a social life because of my constant worrying. I have been mentally going downhill quickly for about a year, and now it is starting to get unbearable. I tried going to my GP for medication, but general practitioners can't prescribe psych meds to anyone under 21. I am scared of my own minds and don't know how to deal with it. My family is extremely busy and stressed as it is, so I really don't want to worry them more than I already have. They already have to go out of their way to drive me to college, and I just really don't want to burden them. I am getting help in two months, so I am trying to keep on pushing through this until then. What do you think, should I tell someone or just wait until I can get professional help (or any other suggestion)? Sorry for such a long explanation.

Wait it out 2
Other (comment) 2
Tell a family member 16
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Comments ( 7 )
  • iH8

    Grayhulk99 and myghoul2099 are idiots.

    It's normal to have emotions, but wanting to kill yourself is something that can be worked on. And your parents, fuck them. Whatever their problems are, they can take time out of their day to help their kid. You need therapy with a psychologist, not a psychiatrist. Tell her/him "I want to kill myself sometimes and I believe I can't ask my parents for help." That will be a hell of a jumping off point.

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  • RainbowFlash

    This does not sound like typical suicidal ideation, it sounds like intrusive thoughts.

    Let me guess, you are fine, then all of a sudden you have a really extreme thought about how you could kill yourself. It scares you, makes you think about it, perhaps scares you more until you manage to fill your thoughts with another activity?

    I suggest you google "intrusive thoughts" and learn how to deal with them. If you find the thoughts begin to abate, then you know what it is.. something that is normal.
    If not, it is one more thing you can cross off the list and gives you something to be proactive in doing until you can get treatment.

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  • Myghoul2099

    listen to hulk if you don't want to rot in an insane asylum forever.

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  • GrayHulk99

    keep it to yourself unless you want to get locked up.

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  • RoseIsabella

    Get help.

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  • mysistersshadow

    I don't know where you are but I think a gp can perscribe stuff like Xanax if your under 21. If you can get it it really helps alot to calm you down. I'm so sorry you are feeling like this it must really suck and its worse you have to wait so long to see someone that can help you. I don't know any good way to tell you for getting through these times just try to remember there are people that care about you and want you to live. And don't tell me there aren't cos I am one of them. :)

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  • sillygirl77

    Tell a family member and see a therapist

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