What should i do?

This summer I fell in love with a girl I've met at work. She was the perfect girl for me, and we used to be good friends. The problem was that her feelings towards me were not the same (I think) but I didn't care much about it since we were good friends. My best Buddie who knew what I felt, while joking with her told her that I liked her a lot. She told him that she was a lesb**n but since I was sure she wasn't I felt like she was rejecting me. After she claimed she was only joking but as I was too hurt and too shy I didn't talk to her. Now its been two months and she started avoiding me with all her heart. The problem is that I'm still in love with her. Now, I can't focus on anything, at school I'm always thinking about her and I really don't know whats happening in the lessons, I don't do my homework anymore and I can't sleep properly.

Last week, I've got her mobile number from her friend, and sent her an sms with the hope of make friends again but all I've said was total sh*t. She received the sms at 11:30pm since I've got some problems with sms's with different networks. She didn't reply to my sms. Today I saw her again and my heart was telling me to go to talk with her but I was too shy and afraid of what her reaction might be so I avoided her.

Now I'm in a conflict between my mind and my heart and I really don't know what I should do: Should I forget her? Should I go talk to her and with what face after avoiding her for 2 months!!! Is this normal or I'm the weirdest person in the world??

Voting Results
64% Normal
Based on 55 votes (35 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • I think you should cut her off, and not even be her friend. Seriously, you will just end up getting hurt again. What you really need to do is pay attention in class, and do your homework. You could also try eating healthier and trying to get on a good sleep schedule. Just focus on you and your education for now, and then once you get in a routine then you can pursue a relationship....with another girl.

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    • kittycatrelle

      Word kick that bitxh to the curb, ya heard

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  • jc82592

    talk to her

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  • born2rock

    This thread is old, but if he ever comes back here and reads it if he's still having problems-

    Man - people can ruin your life by putting you on a string - giving you some glimmer of hope that they still like you.

    This probably isn't normal love you're feeling. It's more intense and the pain from it is darker and more hopeless. It's called limerence.

    If you be friends with her then it'll never go away. The people who told you to say something to her are the closest to being right out of anybody on this page other than me.

    It's hard - but if you continue on without complete closure this won't go away. You will feel awkward. You will be scared. You will later on think back on what you said and get angry at yourself for asking.

    But if you don't get closure - even though all these comments tell you "she's not interested" - you need to hear it from her. Your subconscious brain needs to hear it and you need to feel it - get through it.

    It's a tough process and may take years.

    But like a poster above said - you need to take care of yourself some more and get on a good sleep schedule and eat right.

    Get to the point where you're no longer thinking about whether or not you're good enough for her - or if something would impress her or not - whether or not something would win her affections or make her feel like an idiot for rejecting you.

    Love - screw that word.

    Stay tough.

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    • born2rock

      And look up the word "limerence" if you want to see if this is your condition.

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  • ManaX

    People should learn that when you get in a fight or are about to break up, you call never text. You can't say what you meant to say in the right way for a person to understand with just a few words on a screen. Texting makes things seem less important.

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  • mattjay

    yeah... you could talk to her, have a laugh about it and get things easy between you again. You never know, perhaps she'll come round to you. In the meantime, you get to spend time with her and wank over her in the evenings without feeling completely weird.

    But ultimately, if it's unlikely she'll come round, it's healthier for you to try and forget her, move on and find other people

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  • I agree with everyone who said drop it. Cut of any further contact. She doesn't feel as you do. Nor can you realistically be her friend, since that is only a pretense for you to hope for more.

    You just will look like a fool, or worse, pursuing her any further.

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  • mattyrocks100

    here is what i think u shud do

    find out where she lives go round to her house and tell her then

    it wont be easy but at least it is easier than just forgetting

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    • iamyummy

      i agree with you, she might not know you really like her in that way she might just think you liked her for sex or something.

      sometimes the wrong message goes across and you cannot do anything about it.

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  • princesst76

    well she may have said she was a lesbo coz she dunt like u.

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  • sodas

    with all those signals she has given you, its evident she is not into you (even if you "want" to feel she is into you) you have to forget her its not gonna be easy. in fact it will be tough as f... but its necessary

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  • fashionstar11

    Oh boy.That gossip girl did that with your love cause she´s in love with you!She wants to be with you and she wants you not to be in love with her. That gossip wants you to be in love with her.Trust me!!!

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  • uroly

    Let Go ......... U should have cleared your thoughts and feelings with her at first place.
    Your troubles today are just because of yourself.

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  • pringlehopper

    try just being her friend. Cutting her off won't work, not for either a couple years or till u find a new girl at least, but try to just be friends, that could help. If that doesn't work out then the only thing you can do is try to forget about her.

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  • Anasule

    If you sent her a text and she did not reply she is not interested, that and the more you try the closer to a stalker you will become.

    Just let it go its making you loose sight of whats important in your life which at the moment is school so for now focus on education.

    In life you get many changes someone else will come along and you will get to try again, this time with the benefit of hindsight.

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  • Okay here is what I think you should do. It is obvious that she doesn't have those types of feelings for you, so she is ignoring you. I think you should give up this idea about being here boyfriend and just try and go back to being her friend. It sounds like at one time you were good friends, and I believe if you can get that friendship back it will cure your depression. Just tell her that you cherish her friendship and wish things could go back the way they were when you didn't have these other feelings about her. Don't fret just be a friend to her and look for someone else for a girlfriend. You never know be a friend to her and maybe someday it will develop into more than that, and if it don't no worries you still have a good friend so it's a win situation either way.

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