What shall i do?

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2yrs. An I really love him. When I met him, he was married and so was I. Well, I divorced my husband because I thought maybe he would do the same. And we would live happy ever after, but it didn't work like that. Instead, I called his wife and told her all about me, he denined that he knew me are was ever at my house, so I sent her a message on facebook showing her pictures where he was at my house. I really didn't want to hurt her, I just wanted hem to tell me the truth.
I hate that I did that, we broke up for 2wks, we then got back together and then he told me that his wife was sick and passed out on her job, only to learn she had cancer. GOD rest her soul, she died. But before she died I sent her a message to appologized for all that I had done. I did this before he told me she was sick. She left behind a 12yr old daughter, who knows about all the things that I had done. Me and her father is still together but SHE HATES ME.. I love her so much and send her little gifts just because. I have never met her yet and her mother only been dead for 5 months. He say that he wants his 2 best girls to get alone. I don't have any living children, my daughter would have been her age if she would have lived.
When I call the his house for him, she tells me to hold on and hangs the phone up in my face. He told her that I am his friend. Cause we both agree that it is to early to tell her that I am his women.
I am so obcessed with being with him, until I drive him crazy while he is at work. Where is I use to have him in my arms 4times a week before his wife died, I might see him 1 day durning the weekend. He still do as he has been doing, keeping my bills paid even though he has never lived with me, buy groceries, and still give me money.
I understand that it is easier for grown-ups to get over things than that of a child. An I am learning to step back and let him be a FATHER to his daughter, but I don't know what to do to occupy my mind. I go to school fulltime, but with part-time hours. Durning the rest of the day I have nothing else to do, but drive him crazy about everything.
I love him and he takes alot off on me and he is still here for me when I need him, so yes he loves me. But what can I do to take him off of my mind? And how do I deal with his daughter? I send her gifts, not using my name, the card say to her special friend. I just want to give her all the love that she needs, be her friend when she needs it...
How can i bring OUR RELATIONSHIP CLOSEr instead of pushing him away? How can I stop going off on him for every little thing that he don't do?

Voting Results
23% Normal
Based on 39 votes (9 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • kelili

    I sincerely think that your relationship is doomed. You have done too much silly things in the past for it to work.

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  • redoctober

    Holy wall of text. To save your relationship learn a thing or two about paragraphs.

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  • robbieforgotpw

    No not a texxxxttttt wallllllll
    *sharts**

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  • la_uva_mojada

    your unhappiness is your karma for carrying on with a married man. if u ever want to b happy, START OVER WITH AN AVAILABLE MAN

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    • lady100

      What you fail to realize that at the time that we got together I was married to, he lead me to belive that he was going to leave his wife for me that's why I called her and told her about me. We is still together and strongly in love, I haven't met my step-daughter,but I am taking the advice and giving it time. An why is it a double standard, it's ok, for him to step out and still be a man , but the women that sleeps with him is the home wrecker?

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      • ienquire

        This will never work. He didn't respect his marriage and neither did you.

        These things never work. Not in this world.

        Not to be rude but you a grown woman? You should know better.

        That's not love, its obsession, infatuation and everything else but love. In fact it's weird. Life doesn't reward you if you do something bad or hurt someone for the sake of love.

        You will learn that the hard way!

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  • Blackberry

    Well i don't know how qualified i am to give you this advice seeing that i've never been in this situation but my best advice to you is to back off. His wife just died and no matter how much you love him he loved her first and definitely needs time to deal with his own feelings and those of his daughter. And honestly she has every right to hate you. In her eyes you tore their family apart and as a result her mother died. the whole "friend" relationship between you and her will take a substantial amount of time to develop if it develops at all. Stop sending her gifts because she's going to get the idea that whenever something goes wrong she's suppose to be rewarded. But like i said my advice might not be the most helpful.

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  • Pandabear16

    How are you so certain that he loves you? I know that he pays your bills and gives you money etc, but that doesn't necessarily mean he loves you. I mean what if he's doing the same thing he did to his wife, to you now or later when you guys get together. Also how can you still love/trust him after he has denied knowing you?

    Now if you want to bring you two close to each other instead of pushing him away, you should stop being so clingy with him. I know you love him a lot but you gotta accept that he's busy with job and daughter. Let him come to you, not the other way around.

    As for his daughter let her cope with her loss a little longer. 5 months isn't that long at all. Also her daughter is too young to understand what's going on right now, just gradually get into her life slowly as she grows up.

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    • lady100

      Thanks because, I took your advice and I bagged up and now things are better. We are still in LOVE but I am giving his daughter time to heal and forgive .. thanks

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      • Pandabear16

        Your welcome. Hope things goes the way you want it to be and don't listen to those who are giving you a hard time. Just follow what's best.

        Sorry for the late reply, haven't got on in awhile.

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  • Terence_the_viking

    HOMEWRECKER.

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    • lady100

      Why am I a home wrecker hell, he is the one that stepped out on his wife,hell, he wrecked my home too, and I left my husband for him... But, we still in love and is still together..

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      • Terence_the_viking

        Didn't specify who was i just made a statement.

        You both are.

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  • 2_damgud_4

    Yes .. Karma comes for us all .. Noone escapes their fate especially when we do ill will toward others !

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  • throat_cutter

    IIN this site is becoming a relationship, baby mama, baby daddy drama OUTLET

    Dr. Phil does have a website too, you know, so does Almighty Oprah

    flock to them

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    • michaels4p5

      I agree.

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