What is a man meant to do if a woman hurts his feelings?

76% Normal
16 Comments

There is this woman I like and am attracted to. However, she has done some things that have hurt my feelings. She does not know this because I have not talked to her about it. Society judges men that talk about these kinds of things and I feel she would do the same if I mentioned anything. However, at the same time I kind of think she may not judge me since she seems like a nice woman. The thing is I have opened up to some women in the past that have more or less said it is ok to be honest with them and then those particular women have made me regret it so I just struggle these days. Anyway this is making me have feelings of attraction and then feelings of hate towards her. So since men can't talk about this kind of thing what should I do?

Voting Results
76% Normal
Based on 17 votes (13 yes)
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Comments ( 16 )
  • EuphoniumLizz
    6 years ago

    'better to cry than fake your emotion' can't remember the song but it fits this. If you are hurt tell her, be honest. It's stupid society thinks men have to be cold and unfeeling. It is not unmanly to express hurt feelings.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      Well judged on how I have just been treated by asking other people this question I have decided now what I am going to do.

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      • EuphoniumLizz
        6 years ago

        Best of luck then

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        • Anonymous Post Author
          6 years ago

          Sadly I have been pushed too far emotionally so I plan to give up on love entirely.

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          • EuphoniumLizz
            6 years ago

            Don't let other people take control of your happiness. Take a break and focus on you for a while I am sure someone out there would love to be with you.

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  • jethro
    6 years ago

    You could cry and retreat to your safe place.

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  • [Old Memory]
    6 years ago

    Do it back or tell her about it. Honestly, your feelings will get hurt, be it intentional, unintentional, or for banter. Have some give and take, sometimes friendships thrive off give and take insulting/banter.

    If you want this person then I doubt telling her your feelings are hurt by her comments will do you justice, especially if it's just her sense of humor.

    That said, if it genuinly is upsetting you then bring it up to her.

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  • Yennifer_Of_Vengerburg
    6 years ago

    How'd she hurt your feelings

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  • [Old Memory]
    6 years ago

    If you can't open up to her then she is not for you

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      Good point. The thing is I feel I have not known her long enough or got to know her enough yet to share those kinds of feelings with her.

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  • LionsMane
    6 years ago

    Do what makes you feel best, but start to learn how to better handle your emotions. Also, you should most likely find a new dating pool. You sound like you may be going for the wrong women

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      To be honest I think I do handle my emotions well. I don't just make massive fuss and I don't loose my cool as there are some people that do. The thing is it is not as easy for a man to open up about emotions as some people think it is. Most men feel this way as well about opening up about feelings.

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      • LionsMane
        6 years ago

        Well, everyone handles relationships differently. I personally don't even know if I want a ton of intimacy in a relationship. In the past, I have opened myself up too much and left myself in a bad position. I have found that I think what's best for me is letting women come to me and kind of letting them stretch themselves a little bit. This probably means even lowering my standards to what I might be physically attracted to. That might sound bad, but I think every person needs different things in their relationships. You kind of have to have some self-talk and figure out what you need. Don't know how old you are, but perhaps this is a learning experience for you. It sounds like at this point you are pretty set on talking to her. I say either do it or move on. This in between stage will literally kill you. And if you do go for it, don't make it creepy and don't make it more rude than you have to. In my own experiences, I have at times felt the need to really twist the knife into someone to let them know they have hurt me and I don't know if that's productive. Again, I'd like to think I've learned that the people who are most healthy for me either wouldn't have hurt me in the first place or would have known if something had bothered me.

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  • Blackstarxd
    6 years ago

    You should talk to her about your feelings. Tell her what's going on in your mind because she needs to know how you feel. Don't worry about what "society says" and focus on your own happiness.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      Thank you maybe I should. I have done that in the past before and ended up wishing I didn't though but I guess she is a different person to the others.

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      • Blackstarxd
        6 years ago

        If you see something different in her than the other woman you been with than you should express your feelings. Let me know how it goes.

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