What if the woman wants the abortion but the man doesn't?

I know I KNOW this has been hammered about the woman always wanting to keep the baby but the guy doesn't and shouldn't be financially responsible blah blah blah but hear me out. What if say you're in a serious relationship, you're both in your 20's and have jobs, house all that jazz and, you DO practice safe sex but an accident happened. Now, the woman would like to be married and have a career before a baby...this just isn't the right time but the man is so excited about possibly having a baby now. I don't know what to do...I didn't really know what to put as choices. sorry if they suck.

It's the woman's choice 47
It's the man's choice 11
I have no idea 12
Run away 14
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Comments ( 14 )
  • NeuroNeptunian

    I think that they should have talked about this before having sex. Made sure that they agreed on what which party would do should this happen.

    Talk it over with him and if he makes it clear that your relationship will end if you get the abortion then you're going to have to sort your priorities out. It's his wishes and the relationship over your own wishes. So what's more important to you?

    You're the one that has to carry the child for nine months. If you are willing to do that but you don't want a child then hand it over to him. He can take sole custody and you can have visitation. If he's not willing to do that in order to keep his child then there's no use in going through with the pregnancy without some legal assurance that you won't end up single with a baby on your hip because he thought he wanted to be a Daddy but then he couldn't handle it or you. You can do all of this before the baby is born.

    If you two have a very trusting relationship then you can marry him and have a family with him under the premise that the childcare is mainly his responsibility.

    But if you just can't have a baby right now and he can't accept that then you guys may have to break it off. I'm all for men's rights but not when it comes to this. Carrying a baby for nine months and giving birth followed by the recovery process isn't a joke or something to be discussed hypothetically. A pregnancy changes your life and body regardless of where the baby goes afterwards and until men can know what it's like to carry a child then they don't get the right to force pregnancy on a woman.

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  • myboyfriendsbitch

    I think it would be horribly demented for one person to make such a decision of which two people are responsible for.

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    • That's all fine and dandy for some situations...but this requires a bit more detail. Responsibility only falls on one if things get tough as someone already pointed out.

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      • myboyfriendsbitch

        Ultimately, this is up to the woman. There is no law saying a woman has to go through with a pregnancy if that is what the biological father wants, and there shouldn't be. But I feel that even if only one of the two wants the child and is willing to accept full responsibility, the child should be born. I know pregnancy is life-changing, even if you don't keep the baby, but abortion can give you guilt the rest of your life, especially if it didn't have to happen.This is such a complicated issue, i feel like I'm speaking hallway out my a ass to be quite honest.

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  • The poll answers just irritate me.

    "It's her body, so it's 100% her choice!" Is something people agree with 9No doubt mostly women)

    But "It's her body, so it's 100% her responsibilty" is something that should never be said. Pfft.

    If women get full choice of having a child because it's "her body", then she should have full responsibility of it due to it being "her body".

    But watch, look at the thumbs downs I get, yet watch nobody come with any good reasons to say I'm wrong.

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    • Suprise. Any reasons why? Nooooooope. And they want me to treat women with respect. Pfft.

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  • anti-hero

    I would say it is a 50/50 choice.

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  • trublutxm75

    Maybe its not yours. Let her have the abortion then leave her.

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  • naturefortheworld

    if you choose to have an abortion youll go to hell. keep him/her or give them up for adoption.

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  • Richie240

    Just talk about it and maybe try to convince her if u truly feel like this baby would make you happy. Show her you want to be a dad that will take care for this baby while she continues to work towards her career.. And ask her to marry you! If u really love her and feel like you want this baby.. Make that big step and propose. Good luck bro!

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  • IamPete

    This actually happened to me - I was 28 & my g/f was 18. I wanted her to have the kid, but she felt not ready & wanted an abortion. Despite my preference, I ultimately supported her in hers. So, she had the abortion with my financial and emotional support (pre-Roe v. Wade). My life (and hers, of course) would have been incalculably different, had it gone the other way. For one thing, I wouldn't have had the 2 great kids that I have now, with a different woman.

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  • Shackleford96

    Well, the cold hard reality of it is that it really doesn't matter what the man wants most of the time.

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  • ToxicCrayons

    It's the woman's choice. It's her body. If the relationship ends, she'll be the only who will have to care for the child. If the man can't support her decision, perhaps he is in a relationship with the wrong person.

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  • FocoUS

    Wow. This is a tough one. I sincerely hope they talk this over a long while and consider all options to reach a satisfied conclusion but if they can't, I do believe ultimately it is the woman's choice. It would most likely lead to divorce though.

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