Want to leave this world

I feel that i dont belong here and no one understand me except god not even my parents understands me. I have everything in my life money, decent job basically everything which people wish for but still nothing makes me happy about this world except nature, god, and good people and my parents. Currently i am working on giving up my desires and not there yet but wish to get there. I honestly prefer death knocking on my door. I am not sucidal and believe its a greatest sin which i will never do but desperately want to leave this world. I even told myself if someone offers me billion dollars or death i would prefer death over piece of paper. I think of death everyday and wish death in every moment of my life. I dont know if someone will understand where i am coming from. I personally have a big heart and very generous and forgiving even to those who have hurt me in the past and always try not to think bad about anyone even my enemies. I believe this world has no place for person like me can someone could give me their opinion if it is normal or not