Want to forget my best friend

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9 Comments

So, I come into the first year of college and haven't ever had a close thing with a guy. I become best friends with this sweet, adorable, funny and smart guy. I talk to him about everything and even whine to him and he listens to everything. He's extremely affectionate. Then I start falling head over heels for him and my pent up feelings get me drinking more and more. I start to fabricate things, drink more to get his attention. Because he would take care of me every time. But, he always had a problem with my drinking- 'cause he doesn't.He talks to me about his girl problems. And he's always physically affectionate and cuddles with me all the time. Then he became close to this other girl and behaved with her the same way, i got really jealous and became low again. This distracted me and I made a couple of sacrifices for him which brought me down from my position as batch topper. My studies deteriorated. Now, this other girl is dating someone else, and he had showered me with attention for quite sometime. I start getting annoyed and jealous even when my friends come and talk to him and when I don't get alone time with him. But the problem is- he;'s not attracted to me because I'm fat. Moreover, he's the commitment phobic sort who would just want to have fun.It's killing me inside but I just cannot tell him because then he will just ignore me and not stay friends anymore. On my birthdy party I was having a good time in the pool with him. But then I got really drunk and things got ugly. And he doesn't tell me what scandalous things I did but he's still friendly but disapproving. Now we're going off for 4 months for the summer. When he had gone home for ten days this term, I missed him everyday, pined for him to return Now I know I'm going to miss him like hell and I don't know what to do about it. I've been low all semester because of this and have run out of stories to cover up my emotions for.

Voting Results
54% Normal
Based on 56 votes (30 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • Scrat
    13 years ago

    Just stop drinkinggggg

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    :( same kinda thing with me

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  • TheConsciousElectron
    13 years ago

    Stop drinking and start going to the gym. If you are frustrated, push yourself to your physical limits and you'll feel better. Plus,you won't be fat anymore and you'll be confident enough to approach him.

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  • bovine
    13 years ago

    Check out my blog: towoolgather.wordpress.com

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  • bovine
    13 years ago

    @Scrat: but it's therapeutic!
    @UserFriendlyDrug: I would tell him. But if that changes things between us, that would be horrible. 'Cause at the end of the day, he is my best friend. I don't want things to get awkward between us.
    @Guess WHo: There have been numerous times when I thought he was flirting around just for fun. All that's good, but I know that he still cares for me atleast as a friend. And assuming that he is just flirting(which is actually true, cause he was advising this other friend about relationships and told him that he too should flirt around with friends, to keep options open), what should do about it? I realize that, but now what? That doesn't change my feelings for him, 'cause I'm hopelessly in love with him. There are times when I get really angry with him, but then I still need him also as a frind, and always return even after occasions when he hurts me. There are times, when he's the one yelling out, and seeking me rather than the other way around. He's the one who cuddles up to me all the time, I never do, 'cause I don't want him to think that I have feelings for him- I get so confused with all this.....so what should the next step be?

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  • dulce8
    13 years ago

    im dating my best friend
    i was really sacre to tell
    him but wen i did he told me he felt the same way for a long time
    hes really cute
    and im kind of fat dont worry bout that

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  • UserFriendlyDrug
    13 years ago

    Tell him how you feel. If he doesn't accept you, move on.

    And just because you're a little overweight doesn't make you unattractive. Perk up, buttercup ;)

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  • Guess_Who
    13 years ago

    Well.

    According to your perspective, he is 'sweet,' 'affectionate,' and 'funny.' But really, I think he's flirting with you along with those aother girls that you do not know.

    It is most likely that you are being played at. Wake up please. :)

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    • bovine
      13 years ago

      In fact, I tried acting pricey and ignored him. I just didn't behave the way I do around him. It really irked him, and he was very bothered about it an kept pestering me and telling others to get me to be the same again and everything. And my heart totally melted. He told me to call him when we said a very touching goodbye.....but I havent....I wanna test myself.....see how long I can resist. Am I doing the right thing/.? I don't want to lose self respect at the end of the day, but nor do I want to lose him.

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