Very depressed and confused how this world works..

Maybe you can come to realize that life isn't just about women or even finding a mate. Truth is there are girls out there who like nice guys, they need them. I'm a bit in both worlds yet I'm still single and a virgin so I don't know what to tell you. I think you should either be interested in different girls, or just be more comfortable with yourself, don't think about what type of man you are, just be that man. One special woman will notice that man, and fall in love with you.

As tommy alludes to, most of those guys you see are not really forming *meaningful* relationships. When you find someone (which you will, there are a lot of girls who would like someone like you) you'll have the chance to make it a meaningful relationship. It's quality not quantity, and the guys who have loads of girlfriends but can't form a meaningful relationship with any of them are no better off than you.

Good luck, you'll find someone.

It's simple, bad men (the type you are speaking of) for some reason have a charismatic (but false) charm that women pick up on. Because they think only of themselves they project an image of being either dangerous or mysterious, the two things that women (not all, but heaps) go nuts for.

Then when she starts to find out that he's controlling, manipulative, violent, a liar, shallow or narcissistic, her nurturing instincts take over and she tries to help him. But this doesn't make a dent in his psyche and she begins to blame herself more and more until either she leaves or he does. He then forgets her existence and moves on to the next sucker. He has a sixth sense for "weak" women. I know how these things work because i've never had a relationship that lasted less than a year, and I am a terrible person on the inside, like you wouldn't believe.

The worst part is, there is nothing you can do. Women have always and will always be attracted to bad men.

Nice guys do finish last often, but there are women out there for you (women who know a bad man really is bad), just make the effort to meet them.

You might want to get your head out of your butt and approach some girls with whom you have a chance, can talk to and get to know, build friendships, and ask out on dates.

Yes. I am telling you to actually DO something. You will have fun, romance, be disappointed, scared, excited and learn something about yourself and the opposite sex.

And 10 years from now you will not be idly talking about something you know nothing of (romance) when all you really know is loneliness.

So get off your butt and get out there.

You talk of the girls who dont notice you, what of the girls you dont notice.

Awww, don't be sad.
Not all girls are like that though, maybe it's just the ones that you are interested in that are.

What I see most girls being attracted to is healthy confidence and good hygiene. Looks and a cocky attitude aren't always a must-have for the nice girls.

You seem like a decent guy and you should try to rise to the challenge. Work on building your confidence (Google how to do it) because someone with really low self-esteem can be a bit depressing to be around and it could be driving people away from you.

Double Your Dating by David DeAngelo

How To Become An Alpha Male by John Alexander

But seriously get rid of the "Nice Guy" syndrome. Feminists will hate me but do yourself a favour and don't listen to them.

You just said the one thing that makes you undatable. Low self esteem. Get some self esteem and they will date you. Girls do not want a guy that is pitiful so get some confidence.

You have nice guy syndrome. Become a cunt. Problem solved

No seriously... I wouldn't even bother with that view on " bad boys " attracting girls. If you so happen to notice this then so what? Leave them to it, as Tommythecat said above - there's a cycle of bullshit with the way those boys and girls operate.

Concentrate on your own skills, your own charm. Cultivate your confidence and look for a smart girl.

You'll be fine

So you want to be with these girls that sleep around? Or gluttons for punishment? You should look for like minded people.

Be yourself, have patience and you will find the right girl. If you try to be someone else, you will just end up hurt.

If you want your choice of sluts, sure. be a bad boy.

If you want a RELATIONSHIP, then you're heading the right way for it.

Just remember to look at the average looking girls too, not just the skanky/slutty/super pretty ones who are attacking the bad boys, chances are there's a girl in your life crushing on you, hoping you'll notice her instead of the beautiful bimbo you're crushing on.

Nice guys may finish last, but first prize is an STD and a baby.

I want to comment on comments.

A number of guys seem to be under the false idea that your choice is to either be a "nice guy" and ignored, or a prick-bad boy who gets the girls.This is nonsense.

What is more likely is who more often takes risks and initiates the pursuit. The prick-bad boy has no fear because he doesn't care about rebuff etc. and is aggressive - a characteristic that can set off primitive reactions of desirability for the pursued. That attraction can be high drama even if all her bad judgement results in is years of trauma and therapy for her.

The problem for the "nice guy" (or nice girl for that matter) is their being passive, not their being nice. But decent people have a choice: they can also be assertive. They can take risks and chances. Whenever a guy grouses about the bad-boys versus themselves you can bet that the real issue is that they've been passive and spineless and would rather resent the master-manipulators than man up and do something as simple as talk to girls, get to know them and date.

Same goes for passive girls by the way.

If a woman won't date you, it's NEVER because you're "too nice". Never ever ever.

Think of the ideal person you would want to date. Now become that person.

don't let ppl like that keep you down. if ur the type of guy you say u r than stop being shy for a night and go out there and talk to some girls. im a girl and yes i have turned a few guys down here and there but i do have respect for them coming up to me and trying maybe you will be turned down but im sure a few girls will have respect for you just cuz u tried. but if u keep tring a girl will give you a chance and who knows that girl who gives u a chance just may be the one. so don't give up on yourself or love or anything im just saying keep tring. best of luck 2 u...

The sooner you realize that most people are shallow and evil, the better off you will be.

Don't rest your ego on what happens to you, or what other people think. Realize that you deserve to have what you want, and go for it. People will come and go along the way. People who respect themselves will respect you just for respecting yourself and going after your ambitions. But respect and liking are different. Not everyone will like you, and you aren't going to like everyone.

I know, the way people treat each other is terrible. There is enough hate and war already, and if we can't treat each other with some respect that's pretty bad. I think you sound like a lovely man, there will be somebody who loves you for who you are. I know what you mean. But those types of girls aren't that great: pretty (if being smothered in fake tan and makeup is pretty), kind (no they are back stabbing bitches trust me - past experience), total slut ( yeah ok)! Girls like that are horrible, what about the girls in the middle? Naturally pretty, quite smart, relatively thin and kind.

There are tons of girls out there who don't tolerate bad guys. I don't. Guys who are worldly with this generation, unfaithful, uncommitted, selfish, and dishonest are so unattractive and disgust me. Just have to have a little confidence and if all the things you say about yourself are true, a good girl will fall madly in love with you.

thank u all.. for your precious comments.. i really appreciate that

Self esteem ****

If u have a low self it might be because you could be shy. Just go and start a conversation

The irony in this post: A guy who admits he's not good looking wants a girl who is famous or beautiful. THAT is why. lol There are not so good looking girls out there just like you!! Yayyy!!! But you're not looking at them either, are you?

Right, so you want "beatuiful or famous girls" but you're depressed because you think women are shallow?

You don't sound like that much of a nice guy to me.

We need more guys like you in the world. In my opinion, the girls who go to the 'bad boys' are stupid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VXXXX9iVPI&list=UU9gFih9rw0zNCK3ZtoKQQyA&index=10&feature=plcp

Girls want guys like you but they don't NOTICE you because the world is full of badboys showing off and getting our attention. My fella is lovely and got messed around loads by girls and by chance we got talking and it clicked... We both had the same bad luck and both went after the same assholes who broke our hearts. I'd say your best bet is to put yourself forward a little rather then being the shy friend? Make a girl laugh, smile, feel loved... Be someone she feels protected by? Unfortunatly you will get knocked back time to time but there's always gonna be people willing to help you and pick you back up :)

I agree with what Short4Words and Squirrel-Whisperer have said above. Not all women want "bad boys". I am a "nice guy," and I believe my wife is attracted to me because of it. We are now happily married, and I have not had to change who I am. Different woman are interested in different kinds of people, just as different men are interested in different kinds of people. I wonder if the "bad boy" image is attractive to some people because of the self-confidence required for it. I don't have much experience dating, but I had very low self esteem when I met my future wife and she still liked my personality.

If all the women around you seem to want "bad boys," maybe you could try branching out and making more friends with people from different places and cultures. I don't mean you have to move to a foreign country; just try spending more time with different kinds of people.

Good luck. I believe you will find someone who you can be happy with.

I don't understand why some girls do that, either. I never have (intentionally...it's happened once that he was a bad person, but he hid it well so I didn't work it out til too late).

I have no time for "bad" people in general. Life's too short to waste my time like that.

There are girls who want normal guys. I know I do.

I went through a 4 year dry spell between the ages of 18 and 22. It was a tough time because I was a super nice and considerate guy, yet I was completely invisible to women.

Well shortly after turning 22 the unbelievable happened; I met a girl. She was amazing, we had great chemistry, and the relationship was great. My patience finally paid off :)

Then the stupid whore cheated on me, and had the nerve to dump ME over it. I was hurt, angry, devastated. Shorty after, I got into a toxic relationship where an exceptionally hot woman was cheating on her boyfriend with me, and manipulating me into doing things for her. Obviously, things came to a disastrous end fairly quickly.

This wham bam of fucked up women changed me. I'd become cynical, condescending, smartassed, and (perhaps surprisingly) more confident. I'd just been with two very attractive women back to back, and I'd learned not to let people use me or walk all over me. Guess what happened next?

Women starting throwing themselves at me. I shit you not, but within the next year I slept with about a dozen women.

Being a nice guy gets you nowhere.