Uni is making me sad
I'm a first year in uni. I moved out to college a week ago and settled in well. But there's one thing, one looming saddening aspect that is sagging in my chest and making me feel trapped frustrated isolated and silly for choosing this path. I basically worked extremely hard last year in a minimum wage job to get myself accommodation and then after saving up finally for my dream college covid hit and the campus is dead and depressing my lectures are online it's very hard to meet people outside of my room mates, it's my first year and socialising is literally discouraged.. its making me feel extremely disappointed and feeling overwhelmed that I'm missing out on what could've been such a wonderful year.
I dont know what to do and I think that perhaps that's because these are circumstances that are out of my control and I'm aware that therefore it's in my best interest to learn to accept the hands I've been dealt- I mean that's life right?
I just cant help but feel very unhappy with the situation every bit of fun or happiness is overshadowed by this looming pandemic. I feel so poised and ready to jump into life and seize every opportunity but it feels as though they've all been pulled out of my reach postponed for another year. Maybe longer.. what if my second year of college is also comprised, I'm the kind of person who would absolutely flourish in student life theres so much I want to do but everything is closed down it's making me depressed.
Sorry for the ramble I just feel like I've worked so hard to be in the position I am both mentally and financially and I was so so incredibly ready to really work hard for my life after being irresponsible in my past it made me realise who I am and who I want to be, I want so badly to get stuck in and I'm just so confused.