This is really confusing

7 Comments

Here's the slice.
I liked this guy for three years. BUT only because he showed genuine interest in me for those three years. Honestly, he was this awkward guy, acne and such, tall and lanky.
Anyway, I'm not one for love anyway. It's just not my forte and definitely not something that occupies my mind.
But for three long years, we had this "skinny love" going on. He'd follow me like a puppy dog (I'd never ask him to), blush and humble himself when I complimented his instrument skills, and often times he'd be the only one who'd listen to me.
I fell in very strong like with him, but only this year started to text with him over the phone.
Eventually, my cousin coerced me to tell him how I feel. So I did, then he replied....
"The friendship is still intact, but unfortunately I'm not really into dating šŸ˜"
Oh really? Because for three years, every time we met up in a public gathering, I'd go off to a corner and you'd zero in on me. Showing all the signs of a sincere interest.
So I answered back (after a week) and told him that it was fine. To tell the truth, I'm not really into dating either.
But as we kept talking, he told me something I couldn't believe.
He already knew I liked him. I don't know how long he knew, but he said it was obvious.
Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know that I was the only one acting like a love struck dodo.
Anyway, I still talk to him. But I feel so used by him it's hard. I mean, come on, the only reason I liked him was because I thought he liked me.
Now I feel like he took advantage of that to make himself feel special.
So what do you think happened?

He led you on. 3
You were wasting your time. 6
He liked you, then stopped 1
You've got it all wrong. 6
It's because you like Star Trek 3
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Friedchiken
    6 years ago

    Sounds like you took his friendliness for flirting. Whether it seemed like he was interested in you or not. I don't think there's any reason why he'd just "act" like he likes you for 3 years if he didn't. That's just a waste of both of your guys' time

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  • agrace1819
    6 years ago

    Iā€™m sorry this happened, but if you only liked him because you thought he liked you, then you should have just stopped trying to pursue him. If he really liked you, he would have put in more effort to pursue a relationship with you or at least let you know that he was interested, not just give hints.

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  • radar
    6 years ago

    These things just suck. I don't think we will ever get true clarity about them.

    That situation could be read a million different ways and only he knows (IF he even knows) which one is correct.

    I feel your pain, so hard :(

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  • Boojum
    6 years ago

    Okay, so you feel "used" because, after he hung out with you for years, you explicitly stated that you'd come to like him (even though he's not a prize specimen, in your opinion), and what you heard him say in reply was along the lines of, "Ha ha ha! You said it first! Fooled you! Gotcha!"

    Seesh! There are things that suck about getting old, but leaving this kind of emotionally immature BS far behind isn't one of them.

    First, you should know by now that guys - particularly teenage guys - are notorious for thinking a girl is attracted to them, when all she's trying to do is be a "good girl" who's kind and thoughtful to others. From what you say, it sounds pretty obvious the guy was attracted to you in some way. Why else would he be following you around? Are you his only friend?

    You say you only liked him because he liked you. That's reasonable. Better than you getting a crush on some asshat who hates you, anyway. But if some toad of a guy with disgusting personal hygiene and habits and tastes you found revolting was to indicate that he liked you, would you start looking for reasons to return the liking?

    You came to see things in the guy that you found appealing. You didn't screw up by doing that. Okay, so you now know that, for whatever reasons, he's not willing to say that he likes you too, so you're back to being... whatever you would say you were before.

    This stuff happens in life. If you want to have grown-up relationships, you have to accept that sometimes you're going to put your feelings out there, and the other person is going to say, "Erm, sorry, but I don't feel that way." It's embarrassing to open yourself up and not have the other person reciprocate, but it happens, and it's not the end of the world. Odds are, the day will come when some guy will say something to you similar to what you've said to Mr Lanky, and the boot will be on the other foot, because you won't feel as he does. Remember how you feel now when you deal with him.

    The guy rejecting your "like" does not mean you're a horrible, worthless person. And you're not a fool for letting him know how you felt. All this whole incident means is that your feelings and his don't match up. Does knowing that really make so much difference to your life as a whole?

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  • rayb12
    6 years ago

    Ha ha ha u let a guy follow u around like a puppy dog for years and then You feel used. Get fukt

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    • charli.m
      6 years ago

      This.

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    • rayb12
      6 years ago

      I've met peanuts more self aware

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