Thinking about my ex cheating makes me want to commit suicide

80% Normal
7 Comments

She was my first kiss/ relationship. We were friends for a year and then together for 3 1/2 years. We broke up 2 years ago.

I've had sex and hooked up with a lot of girls since her but no one gets close in comparison. I was so comfortable with her. I thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. She said she loved me.

She hooked up with a bunch of guys she barely knew and lied to me about it for months. When I visualize what she's done with those guys it instantly makes me want to commit suicide. This has gone on since I found out.

When I let myself think about it more the idea of killing myself becomes stronger. It feels rational. Everything in life seems dull compared to the good times I shared with her. I've done things since the breakup that on the surface would seem amazing but when I think about what is like to have sex with her.. I just haven't felt good like that since. It feels like I never will again.

Voting Results
80% Normal
Based on 5 votes (4 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • CDmale4fem
    6 years ago

    The best thing you can do is focus on yourself, your work or studies if you are in school. Find the good in you again, don't let her being a tramp and a slut define who you are or will grow to be. There is NO ONE IN THIS WORLD that I would ever consider suicide over (again). You cannot let her actions define who you are going to be. What if I was in your place and I had wrote your post. You read my post then what would you tell me ? I agree that in real life and true love women can drive us fucking crazy. There are to many people out there in this world to say you will never be happy again. When I got married to my 2nd wife, I was in navy. We got married in vegas, came home for a few days and as we pull into parking lot where she lives she tells me "Bills been living with me, and I love him." I wanted to wring her neck in the spot. I wouldn't let her selfish " all about her" attitude take over my life and do something stupid. Are you a religious person ? You realize in the bible it says to commit suicide is a eternity in hell. I know, many do and many don't believe in Gos , the bible, or heaven and hell. But bottom line DON'T LET HER ACTIONS CONTROL YOU. YOU HAVE TO BE STRONGER for your parents, and brothers and sisters you have, if any. Don't let your ex win. Call up a really good female friend, go for a walk with her or just ask her to sit and talk with you. Just someway to set your focus on a different and more productive path. It will get better. I promuse. You didn't mention ages. That can make a big difference too as to your decisions. Good luck, and find a friend to talk to, or sibling, or just someone.

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  • Bilover91
    6 years ago

    Thinking about my ex makes me horny because the man she is with used to come over and fuck me and her but mostly just teased me making me suffer not being able to cum or even get the pleasure of sliding my cock inside her. Sometimes id be forced to go a week or more without reaching a orgasm

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  • [Old Memory]
    6 years ago

    Memories are sometimes sweeter than the reality of what happened.
    The imagination on the other hand tends to make things seem worse than they ever possibly could be.
    After 2 years your feelings are too strong and you should contact a therapist. Don’t kill yourself over a memory, it doesn’t solve anything and will leave the people who care about you now heartbroken forever.

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  • Whatintarnation
    6 years ago

    Most people always go crazy over their first love. Rejection coupled with cheating can be a tough pill to swallow. But ending yourself is just foolish. You only get a short time here and to end it early or spend all your time living in the past just sucks. Time to bury that crap and move on. Life starts again. Just hang in there.

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  • mr.artiste
    6 years ago

    It'll pass. Don't stress too much and don't do anything stupid.

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  • AlasAtlas
    6 years ago

    My friend recently broke up with her very first love and she went crazy. I realize it can only take one person to ruin your mental state but it doesn't have to be like this. I can't help or control my friend, she's been going down a destructive path and won't listen to anyone. You need to observe your own actions everyday, is laying in bed moping going to make you feel better? No. I don't know your situation and I can't feel your pain but 2 years has been a good amount of time, it's ok to be mad every now and then about it. When you're older you're gonna laugh about crying over a silly hoe, i know I think I was dumb for crying over people before. The only thing you should be concerned with is making sure you stay healthy both physically and mentally. Try to be aware if you're going down a destructive path, you can heal yourself with time and acknowledge these events but try not to dwell on them too much

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  • paramore93
    6 years ago

    Dwelling on the past can make you go insane.
    Easier said than done but you have to start looking forwards instead of backwards. Sounds like you deserve somebody much better tbh.
    Life is full of amazing moments, it might take time but eventually you will start to feel better :)
    Bottling everything up can make everything 10x worse, talk to somebody and get everything off your chest, it's really cathartic.
    I usually get all reminders of exes and have a little fire in the middle of nowhere, it's like saying goodbye and moving on.

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