The lawn game....iin?

I made up a game, and I force my neighbor to unwittingly play it. See, my neighbor cares about their lawn, and I exploit that. I am great at predicting grass growth, and I use it to my advantage. My neighbor has no clue when it's opportune to mow, this idiot will mow right before a rainy day followed by sunny days, thus making more work for herself. I check the 10 day weather forecast, and plan my mowing based on that and when my neighbor mows. I make it so that my neighbor feels compelled to mow their lawn well before they really NEED to, and more times than they actually need to. My goal is to make them mow 3 times for every 1 time I do....so far, I'm right on track. I do this by creating a visible difference between their lawn and my lawn, making mine look better longer, with less work.

I thought of a way to win even more. I think I'll mow my lawn in stripes, that way, I'll only have to mow exactly half of it each time. I'll leave every other stripe longer, and just trade off the stripe that I mow each time I mow.

I even made up a score sheet for this year so I can keep track. I might even buy myself a trophy for when I win.

IIN?

Voting Results
37% Normal
Based on 131 votes (49 yes)
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Comments ( 42 )
  • UnrecognizableMan

    Most women want to keep their lawn short. Us guys can get away with it being a little more bushy.

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    • coolio75650932

      lol sounds like a sex joke (think about it for a sec and you know what i mean)

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  • Captain_Kegstand

    Lolz, sounds like you are a mix between an evil mastermind, and a very bored man. I got a good laugh out of this though!

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  • Avant-Garde

    This is rather brilliant. Lawn domination.

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  • Immune2BS&way2Illuminated

    Diabolically hilarious. "Lawn Care & How to Beat your Neighbors at it." Btw you should buy that trophy just for kicks. Put it outside where she can see it and laugh your head off when she squints at it across the lawn.

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  • BlackDays

    Everyones sense of humor seems to be missing. For shame :(

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  • Wambo37

    you need help

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  • nismo45

    Sociopathic lawn terrorism..

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  • anti-hero

    All that plotting and planning sounds like more work than mowing. $10 bucks says you are unhappily married or divorced.

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    • I am neither of those, so I'll take my $10....cash only, NO CHECKS!!

      As I explained below it's like 5-10 minutes a week that I plan it out, which I'd be doing anyway at least with the weather aspect of it all. OK so there's an extra 2 minutes of planning and calculation involved due to factoring in my neighbor's mowing habits, but it's well worth it.

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      • anti-hero

        haha I was just being a jackass. Where do I send the cash?

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  • mauwpauw

    You're nuts.

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  • bigtoy

    Sad. Get a life!!!

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  • thinkingaboutit

    lol! random but great story to tell all your neighbors.

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  • dappled

    Interesting post. You seem to have divided the community of IIN into two factions. It amused me. The idea of a trophy amused me quite a lot.

    If I live long enough to retire and I have time on my hands, I can see myself doing things like this just to amuse myself. I don't do it any more but I used to send anonymous books to a friend with fake inscriptions. Like Nancy Reagan's autobiography signed, "I'll never forget the good times we had. Love, Nancy" and a book about tractor repair inscribed "Just in case you ever need it".

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  • BlackDays

    Brilliant!

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  • BurnaBaby27

    Get a life. Seriously, get a life. You obviously have way too much time on your hands.

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    • shade_ilmaendu

      I don't see anything wrong with what he's doing. What's a few extra minutes for a little bit of entertainment?

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    • Hey now, I have to mow the lawn anyway, and also I check the weather anyway because that's what normal people do, and I don't enjoy mowing the lawn so I take all of 5 minutes to plan it out according to the weather. You know, work smarter, not harder!! It just seems more fun to make it a game. I do enjoy secretly aggravating my neighbor because she's annoying, so that's just a bonus. Seriously it takes me about 5-10 minutes a week total planning it out. I happened to think of the stripe thing one day out of the blue, I passed by a baseball field and I noticed the pattern and figured I'd do something similar and it would be less work.

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      • IrishPotato

        Perhaps BernaBaby27 IS your neighbor. >:OO

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  • Justsomejerk

    Salt his earth.

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  • Thats hilarious.
    Not all that normal but it seems too be giving yoo a sense of purpose in yoor free time at least! :L x

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  • chicken471bologna

    Hahahaha what a loser. Get a life fag.

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  • FUCK!!!!!!! I just got bitched at for not mowing my lawn. Well, I was at a 4:1 ratio anyway, but damn, I have to mow tomorrow. Jokes on them though, I haven't paid rent in a year and nobody's said shit yet. They're afraid of me, I think.

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  • Truth_teller

    Weird! But if this is your hobby plotting out against your neighbor to make them waste time, then do you buddy.

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  • Wow, basically you are a real life troll ?

    I do the same thing. Well not with the lawn, but I do enjoy being an asshole.

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    • Yes, I am...I have the balls to be a real life troll, I excel at my torment and have NO FEAR!! I pity the fools who have to hide on the internet. Been this way my whole life. I'M NO INTERWEBS GANGSTER!! I'M THE REALNESS!!

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      • Why not sneak over at night and crap on the neighbor's lawn, or piss on random spots so that parts of the lawn die?

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        • Been there, done that....and worse!!

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          • Well then how would they have a lawn left to mow? You need to stay more dedicated if thats the case.

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  • dalmationUntoyourSoul

    my neighbor cut his lawn every day. i thought he was retarded. i get a kick out of your thing though. it's nice to torment the one-upsy kinda folk. it's like when i look smoking hot on the weekends in clothes i found in the dumpster and all the dumb sluts look alike in their designer clothes, it only takes 5-10 minutes a week but fuck 'em, feed 'em fish heads.

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  • if u were my neighbor i would be looking thru the curtains laughing at u, i would get up early and start the mower and just leave it revving near yr bedroom and when u got up to check out my lawn u would see it was knee high just like before, youd have to think of a new way to torment me if i lived next door lol

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  • pixie_dust

    its too bad u get pleasure from causing others' lives to suck.

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    • dalmationUntoyourSoul

      other people's lives will only suck if that is their true will.

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  • myownopinions

    I voted not normal in the sense that not many people (or any) that I know do this sort of thing, but that just makes you a trendsetter. It's too bad I don't have a lawn in my front yard...

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  • Shackleford96

    That is pretty funny I thought. It seems like I've seen this story on here before though (or one similar to it)...

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  • chubbawubba69

    This isn't normal but it's fucking hilarious.

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  • jermath35

    Fuck that eat the weeds and out live ur neighbor because of the health benefits!

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  • Who_Fan4Life

    Stick plastic forks in his lawn at night!

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  • victim130

    I'd say its a little weird, but challenging yourself is normal. I'm half and half, although you get normal in my books for the awesome idea :P

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