The gentlemen...

48 Comments

So I was reminded today about chivalry and it made me think about guys holding doors open. And people in general holding doors.

I normally when walking behind someone get a door held open for me. And if someone is walking behind me I always hold the door for them.
this seems the polite thing to do.
however there was one time I was walking behind a guy who let the door close in my face... it was a heavy door and it closed quickly... I almost ran right into it. At the time I was mad because I thought how rude!
would you find this rude as well? Do you hold doors open for people?

My next question has to do with guys holding doors for their gf/wife. As a guy do you automatically hold the door open for your significant other?
Or do you not want to do that at all?

My bf always holds doors open for me. If I am the first to arrive at a door I will wait for him to pull it open so I can walk in. I never thought to much of it before.
Today as an experiment I got to the door first when we went to a gas station and opened it... his reaction " what are you doing? I would have gotten it." ... I just said sorry!
I think I will just countinue to let him open doors for me. Tho I do feel a bit spoiled.

I would actually never go out with a guy that didnt hold open doors. Mostly I think I took my mom very seriously on dating advice. She told me 2 things were important on a first date. One was if the guy came to the door to knock and meet the family... do not let some guy honk at you to come out. The other was to see if he had manners and held doors open for you. And so if I went on a date with you I took my moms advice to heart because I wanted a gentleman.
Share your thoughts on this?

Guys opening doors is this still mostly normal? Or no?
People holding open doors... normal?

im a guy I hold doors for my significant other	13
im a girl I get doors held open for me	5
i would never let a door close in someones face	19
I never hold doors for anyone	3

Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!

[ Report Post ]

Comments ( 48 )

charli.m

9 years ago | pl

I hold doors for people and get the favour returned for the most part. There are always some dicks, though.

I feel weird when my boyfriend does things like getting the car door for me and paying for almost everything, he probably feels weird about me being adamant that I pay for things. It's just how he was raised and how people are in his area. It's sweet and i appreciate him being kind and thoughtful, but I like to be able to return the favour, too.

Comment Hidden ( show )

10

10
- dynamohumm
  
  9 years ago
  
  Wow your boyfriend sounds great! He is definitely a keeper. :)
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  1
  
  1
  - charli.m
    
    9 years ago
    
    Hehe. Thanks :)
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  I dont get my car door opened. Only once on prom :P
  I also dont pay for things... but thats because I am an at home mom. So at home mom things are my responsibility.
  
  That is sweet of him.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - charli.m
    
    9 years ago
    
    He doesn't always do the car door, it's not practical.
    
    He did rescue me from a harmless bug I jokingly said I'd have to refrain from going crazy over if it landed on me.
    
    He IS sweet. No matter what most of IIN think. Jerks.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    2
    
    2
    - reminiscent
      
      9 years ago
      
      Its not
      
      My bf saves me from bugs too... and our daughter from them lol. Its cute.
      
      Why would most of inn think he wasnt sweet. I dont know much but he sounds nice from what you have said so far
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      0
      
      0
      - charli.m
        
        9 years ago
        
        He pisses people off here haha.
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        0
        
        0
        
        -
        
        reminiscent
        
        9 years ago
        
        Oh lol
        if you dont mind me asking he has an account here too?
        
        The important thing is he is sweet to you ;)
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        0
        
        0
        
        See More Comments =>
CanadianCowboy

9 years ago

I'll hold the door for pretty much anyone to be honest

Comment Hidden ( show )

3

3
thegypsysailor

9 years ago

I really think it depends on the situation. If my gal and I are entering a car on different sides, I'm not going to run around the car, open and shut the door, then run back to my side and get in.
If we're entering a building,then sometimes; I don't know what determines the action, I've never thought about it before.
I certainly hope that you were exaggerating when you said, "I would actually never go out with a guy that didnt hold open doors", as I sincerely believe you'll be missing out on some pretty cool guys because of a really old fashioned and inconsequential ideal.

Comment Hidden ( show )

3

3
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  I wasnt exagerating as on a first date I would be looking if you were polite.
  
  Now after the first date if we just held doors open for each other i would be fine with that too. Like whoever got to the door first held it open.
  but as I mentioned above my bf just did all the door openings. And i even attempted yesterday to open a door...and we see how that went lol.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - reminiscent
    
    9 years ago
    
    Also im not talking about car doors... I only had my car door opened for me by him once on prom night.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
modernism

9 years ago

I usually hold the door open for people or strangers (I'm a girl) but I get the door held open for me by guys most of the time.

I honestly think it's really sweet - especially if they don't even know you. It's not mandatory by any means, but it's just a really simple act of kindness that will make anyone (not only females) feel valued to some degree.

Comment Hidden ( show )

2

2
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  I agree :)
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
kupokupo

9 years ago

When I think of chivalry, I picture riding a stallion of golden white with heavy steel armour glaring in the sun and stabbing people in their stupid stomachs like a badass mofo. I guess you could say chivalry is dead.

Comment Hidden ( show )

2

2
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  Pft I hope not! At least not completely considering some of the things were just being plain decent...
  Such as protecting the weak and defenceless... helping widows and orphans... fight for the welfare of all...At all times to speak the truth
  sounds pretty much good for all genders actually.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  1
  
  1
  - kupokupo
    
    9 years ago
    
    Yeah but being plain decent is the lesser part. Stabbing people is where it's at.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    1
    
    1
    - Shackleford96
      
      9 years ago
      
      ^I like this guy :)
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      1
      
      1
    - reminiscent
      
      9 years ago
      
      Lol... maybe for some
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      0
      
      0
RainbowDischarge

9 years ago

My man always gets the door for me. If Im a few steps ahead, he will pick up his pace and get the door first. When I open it for him, he tells me to go in and follows behind me.

Comment Hidden ( show )

2

2
Arm0se

9 years ago

There's a difference between not being an asshole, and being a pushover. If you're already at the door/ going inside, why not hold it open a little for the next person? But if the woman gets to the door first, I'm not gonna let her pretend she forgot how to use her arms.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  Lol
  I think he would really start questioning me if I started opening the door to places. more weird looks and asking me what im doing... :P
  But with friend male or female if I get to the door first I open it for them.
  and im sure if I was with another guy who didnt open the door if I got there first... I would have a different behavior and open the door if I was first to arrive.
  so all depends I suppose.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  1
  
  1
  - Arm0se
    
    9 years ago
    
    Well, if he only does it to you that's kind of cute, he respects you. But if he does it with everyone it's a little strange to me.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
    - reminiscent
      
      9 years ago
      
      No only for me and my daughter.
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      2
      
      2
TrustMeImLying

9 years ago

Sometimes I open doors to be a dick

If someone is several feet behind me I love opening the door for them because they say "oh. Thank you" after which they almost always start to jog or haul ass towards the door so I don't have to hold it for too long. Always makes me chuckle (on the inside)

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- charli.m
  
  9 years ago
  
  I was walking home from the shops with a big heavy granny trolley full of shopping, and I wasn't even close to the road and some fucking arsehole stops his car and waves me across, so I hurried and that resulted in the well smashing on the trolley and the tyre coming off.
  
  In attempting to put it back on, I almost passed out in the heat (plus I was sick) and it came off again several times on the 15 remaining minutes of my walk home. And now I need to buy a new one so I'm down $24.95.
  
  That guy was a fucking cunt and I hope he gets all his tyres let down every day for the rest of his life.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  2
  
  2
  - charli.m
    
    9 years ago
    
    Wheel not well, you fucking tard.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  Seems silly as no one thinks you're being a dick. Everyone things your being polite. Picking up the pace doesnt take much effort.
  id never jog to a door but i would walk quicker.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - TrustMeImLying
    
    9 years ago
    
    But but... I like being seen as a dick. Why would you take that away from me? :(
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    1
    
    1
    - reminiscent
      
      9 years ago
      
      Im sorry... sometimes the truth hurts *pats your shoulder*
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      2
      
      2
Dad

9 years ago

I obviously open doors for all women since I was raised decades ago when this was basically mandatory.

But women's lib has caused a lot of confusion for men. Should a guy hold a door open for his female boss? Should a guy continue to hold a door open after his female partner has entered and other women approach the door? This later one is difficult, because it may leave his partner waiting for him inside.

Chivalry in our very populated cities and with our ever increasing equality has caused confusion in guys to alter some of their gentlemanly ways; these qualities are still within most men though.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  Well I can tell you that I think If you reach a door first you should hold it open male or female.
  
  I know if there are other people male or female coming in the door my bf will hold it open for them as well. I politely wait off to the side once I have entered.
  if there is quite a large amount of people you pass the door holding responcibility off to someone. Usually someone offers " hey thanx I got this." And they will take over holding the door.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  2
  
  2
  - Dad
    
    9 years ago
    
    And the big city over populated cafe' that everyone is barging in to quickly buy and eat their lunch before works starts again?
    
    It can work within a couple (that you originally described) but sadly not practically in our society any more.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    1
    
    1
    - reminiscent
      
      9 years ago
      
      I guess I wouldnt have an answer for that... maybe walk in but hold the door wide behind you with one hand to make sure it doesnt close in the person behind you ?
      Thats my best bet.
      
      I dont live in a big city ... I dont really like big cities lol
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      2
      
      2
      - Dad
        
        9 years ago
        
        I live in the country myself.
        My biggest city issue was driving 10 feet then stopping for the traffic lights then repeating again and again!
        Plus a man can be more of a gentleman in a small town :D
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        0
        
        0
        
        -
        
        reminiscent
        
        9 years ago
        
        I just dont like too many people around me sll the time lol
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        2
        
        2
- anti-hero
  
  9 years ago
  
  Quiet suckonthis9.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  1
  
  1
Shackleford96

9 years ago

I generally try to hold open doors for my girl as well as other people if I get the chance. I think most people appreciate it.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  I know I appreciate it... I always make sure to thank the person.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - Shackleford96
    
    9 years ago
    
    Me too, if someone happens to hold the door open for me.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    1
    
    1
Fall_leaves

9 years ago

Its sweet when a guy opens the door for me but I don't don't wait on him to open it if I'm already at the door, I just open it and hold it open until he reaches the door. And if dinner or dessert is on me I'll hold the door open for him, guys like to be wined and dined too!

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- reminiscent
  
  9 years ago
  
  Lol thats very true.
  when we didnt live together I had a rose with a big blue bow (his fav color) delivered to him.
  So dont think I dont romance him as well ;)
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
donteatstuffoffthesidewalk

9 years ago

so yall goin thru a revolvin doord be a breakup then?

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
kingofcarrotflowers

9 years ago

I hold doors open for everyone or if ipive got hands full I'll keep it open with my foot etc

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0

Are You Normal?

The gentlemen...