Sometimes i wish i was a cat, but...

52% Normal
12 Comments

Sometimes when I'm tired and stressed out and have a lot of bills to pay and a revoked drivers license, I dream of being a house cat. All curled up, warm, sleeping, without a care in the world, my food delivered regularly, free back rubs, the WORKS.

Then I remember all the terrible things I've done to cats and I think to myself "what's worse, paying bills or having someone blast a giant fart in my face every day? Do I want to be neutered? And when my owner gets tired of me, I don't want to get hanged or thrown off a bridge into an icy river, tied up in a burlap sack."

Maybe paying bills isn't SO bad.

IIN?

Voting Results
52% Normal
Based on 29 votes (15 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • NeuroNeptunian
    11 years ago

    The fuck, who goes around hanging their cats and throwing them into rivers?

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  • howaminotmyself
    11 years ago

    I'm going to ignore most of what I just read and focus on having free back rubs, food delivered, and sleeping. That sounds nice.

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  • Terence_the_viking
    11 years ago

    Oh did you know that curiosity is your worst enemy mr catty cat face.

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  • [email protected]
    11 years ago

    For good pussy FUCK a CAT!

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    • Flippin-dillydogs
      11 years ago

      Stfu Animal Rapist

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  • GoraIntoDesiGals
    11 years ago

    "And when my owner gets tired of me, I don't want to get hanged or thrown off a bridge into an icy river, tied up in a burlap sack."

    Veeeeery unlikely to happen to my cat. I'd kill whoever hurts my cat.

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  • bemah
    11 years ago

    Hahaha omg your so funny i can't stop laughing!!!

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  • thanksforthefreecar
    11 years ago

    "And when my owner gets tired of me, I don't want to get hanged or thrown off a bridge into an icy river, tied up in a burlap sack."
    I hope your not speaking from experience.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      11 years ago

      Oh I've done worse than that. I've done worse than that by accident, let alone on purpose.

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      • beautywithapast
        11 years ago

        Oh, poor poor kitties! I would easily take a bullet for my cats.... If my friend was murdered I would be sad/scared.... if my cat was I would find that fucker and kill him.

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  • EAT_IT
    11 years ago

    If I was a cat I'd be like CAT from Red Dwarf and eat lots of fishy! Fishy fishy fishy! Hey little fishy! I'm gonna eat you little fishy!!! ;)

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  • SwampDonkey
    11 years ago

    I was thinking the same thing while watching an alligator lazily drifting down the river. the sun on its back, the cool water below. the occasional fish on which to dine. oh, alligator, you cannot appreciate the freedom of a life absent of troubles, the malignant fears of an existence fraught with worry that slowly consumes me, eroding my will to procede. Then I slowly rolled the weighted hooker to the bottom of the river... and pressed on.

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