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I am a 21 year guy that knows wat to say to girls but can only say it online and not in person. i get all scared and nerves and start to clam up. i hate it too cuz i know i can get them its just i can't talk to em unless if its online untill i get to know them online really good. im vary shy and am single cuz of it plz help me out comments will be helpfull and welcomed.
u will get cute points if u tell the girl that u get nervous around girls and keep talking!
I'm kinda like you... eventually I learned you gotta swallow that shyness if you're going to do anything with a woman you're interested in. Once you do it a few times its not AS bad... but I still have it, getting a little better
Best of luck mate
i have the same prob and im a girl but i am shy for legitly ANYTHING i cant even ask the teacher if i can go to the bathroom..i mean how pathetic is THAT!! btw im still in school
It might not be as common in certain scenes, such as a bar or a social gathering, but it is certainly not abnormal.
If shyness is a personality trait of yours, for better or worse, then you simply need to find someone who nurtures, or at least accepts, that quality.
Many girls are tired of over-assertive guys pushing themselves onto them--so if you can make yourself known, you'll probably find being reserved can be a good thing. It makes you seem unselfish and mysterious, and in general I find it makes girls want to find out more about you.
I have been extremely shy my entire life and as a result have always been reserved and quiet--sure, I've missed some opportunities, but it also gives me the chance to step back and analyze everything, including what I say before I say it.
The more I realize that it's just who I am and the more I accept that fact, the more comfortable and less shy I become, ironically.
I see a lot of other comments alluding that you just need to "stop being timid," but I realize that it is not that simple.
Being shy is not an activity you do which you can simply stop doing; it is a personality trait that has been built up as a culmination of life experiences, probably since childhood.
I'm sure you have the ability to overcome the problems associated with being shy, but that doesn't mean that being shy in general is even a "bad thing" that you need to stop doing.
The bottom line is, you should be comfortable. Usually being shy is a sign that you are not in your comfort zone. Think about it--when you're at home hanging out with friends you know well, you probably don't act nearly as shy. But when you're at a party with people you don't know, or trying to impress a girl, it can be intimidating--they haven't had a chance to see who you are and you don't want to give them the wrong impression or seem like an awkward person.
The idea is to focus on becoming more comfortable with yourself in all situations. It will take time, and asserting yourself in those situations will certainly feel awkward, but those are the stepping stones to being comfortable in those situations--push yourself to take small steps toward polite assertiveness, and eventually you will not even think about it.
It's not only a matter of not worrying as much about everyone else and what they think of you, but it's a matter of not taking yourself as seriously, and not building up those situations in your head to be more important than they really are.
If you screw up trying to talk to a girl and she gets a first impression other than what you had hoped, so what? She probably won't care, and if she doesn't understand, then it's likely not going to work anyway. Creating a new relationship with someone often takes some trial and error--you won't get it right all the time, but you'll never get it right if you never try.
Being nervous about it and building it up in your head will make it more difficult--it's a vicious cycle that can only be broken by accepting yourself for who you are and training yourself to focus more on what's going on and having a good time and less on how other people will react to you. They likely aren't letting you control how they act, why should you let fear or nervousness about them control how you act?
Never admit that chicks make you nervous or that you find them attractive. Do jocks ever do that? Who gets the girls? Hello. Also, NEVER tell a woman that you love her. They will lose all respect for you. Chicks love the caveman, so stop being a slave man. Take charge. Women want to be told what to do.
i am a chik and im the exact same i usually get to know ppl online then meet them and its a little easier.. but if not i get them to come out with my friends then im alot more comfortable and can talk more then they see how i really am.. my bf now we met on msn and he was kinda shy too so we understood that we didnt really know what to say haha we just watched movies and started off from there now its a year and a half later still together! :)
I have the same problem with you, but I don't know how to overcome the situation.
everyone has an ego, and getting shot down damages everyone's ego. go someplace you don't know anyone, bite the bullet (thanks JoeyAnne) and introduce yourself to a girl. she might not be into you but she'll probably be polite about it and if shes not she's probably horrible anyway. once you get some stones you can approach girls you know.
GET SOMEONE ELSE TO TALK TO THE GIRL YOU LIKE!
if not,the first comment.bite the bullet,stop being so timid.
that is so low. you shouldnt have someone else talk to the girl you like. it might show her that you arent ready to commmit to her.i have been there. i had a friend talk to a reall hott guy, and she ended up goin out with him. it isnt right. and i am the same way. i dont like talking to the guy i like in front of him, but we talk over textand email. but the stuff we talk about would never be said in person ;) if ya know wat i mean, and i like it that way. it makes it easier for me to say how i really feel. because when i say how i feel, my face turns bright red. ...
hope everything works out for you!
TEXT MESSAGE! try that.
if not, the first comment is right. bite the bullet, stop being so timid.
I think shyness is attractive...that's how I found my first love. He was shy and I find that incredibly cute. Sometimes though, you have to just bite the bullet and do it. Stop blaming shyness :D. Good luck!