Should we get a divorce?

5 Comments

We are married for 6 years, dated for 2 before that.
I always known she wasn't romantic. But i didn't expect her to forget every important day, nor to always wait for me to make the first move to have sex (even when she wants to), amoung other things.
Sexually, i would like to explore more. Even only between us, but besides letting me go down on her, and vaginal sex, nothing else happens (she doesn't like/want).
We have no kids, just a house that we bought together. Moneywise it's not bad, but not enought that either one could live alone and pay their expenses.
Also, i'm going through a down fase. Don't call it a depression, but it's getting there.
I have never cheated on her, nor am i going to (at least in the near future). But i miss something. Like being wanted and more sex adventure/exploration.
Should we split right now, even knowing we can't live alone on our salaries? Should i try and hope for better days (she already knows i want more)? Should we just keep together (don't know how long can i keep this up)? Should i wait for a better moment (financially for both) and them divorce?
What do you think i should do?

Yes, right away 3
Try to talk to her (again) 11
Wait for a better moment 0
No. 1
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Comments ( 5 )
  • myboyfriendsbitch
    10 years ago

    Have you every talked together about going your separate ways? Do you know if she's as unhappy as you are? It might help her to meet you halfway of she knows you've been thinking about these things. The best thing you can do is communicate, both of you. If the divorce thing starts to come into focus you might both realize you don't want to be without each other. I'm not saying use that to get a response from her, but it might help to let get know you feel like giving up. Be honest and tell get you're not happy instead of just telling her what you want. Use your emotions.

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  • college
    10 years ago

    You might want to give marriage counseling (be sure to find a reputable counselor) a try if your not absolutely sure you and your wife have irreconcilable differences. Other than that, a divorce is better than an unhappy marriage.

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  • enid23
    10 years ago

    If talking doesn't work try another technique, star being cold with her, go out late with friends, start watching some porn or something that would make her notice that something is wrong, when she notice and she will tell her that you can't take it anymore, you want a change preferably with her but that if she doesn't want to then you will have to move on. Don't stay just because the money, if it doesn't work it doesn't work, and there are ways to stay together for the economical issue but being clear that you are moving on and when the time is right you want a divorce. If she doesn't do anything about it then in probably that she has lost interest to. In any case scenario don't settle for less because you will regret it. Good luck and I hope everything turns out for the best.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    Welcome to marriage / long term committed relationships AKA the end of your sex life as you knew it ;)

    Likes others have said, communicate with her letting her know how you feel and listen to how she feels and then work on it. It takes effort/action because talking about it isn't enough. What you're experiencing is exactly why married couples turn swinger or agree to start fucking other people but stay married if they have kids. You don't have kids so there's really no good reason to stay together besides the financials. Maybe you both could turn roommates and start dating other people. That way you both get what you each want and you're still financially ok.

    Beyond that if you do want her to initiate and you want to still try to make it work then learn how to flirt with her and seduce her. In long term relationships girls really need the romancing, flirting, etc, because fucking the same person GETS OLD as you've found out. The truth is the flirting, sweet talking, etc. at this point may not make a long term difference. She's already cold to you and you to her and even if the flirting excites her, for how long? A year? two years? To me it sounds like you both want out and hey, let's get real she doesn't even satisfy your sexual appetite so this is kinda doomed before it started.

    If she isn't wanting to do what you want in bed then you're only going to end up resenting her then probably divorcing her or cheating on her. People have needs and they find ways to get them fulfilled.

    Btw, she's still horny, just not for you:

    It's much easier for girls to get super horny for a new (hot) guy they haven't fucked a million times same as it is for men and a new girl.

    New = fun.
    New = exciting.
    But
    NEW<> better.

    Hey most relationships 'fail' or 'end' you're just part of the statistics or soon will be, sorry.

    Talk it out and see what she says then write us back!

    BOOM.

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  • Isabella80s
    10 years ago

    It sounds like you're not in a great place (as you mention) and perhaps you shouldn't be making life changing decisions whilst like this. Communication is obviously very important in a r'ship, so TALK to her! It might not be easy, of course, but you got married for a reason, right? As for the exploration in the bedroom thing, not everyone is into being overly 'exotic' and I'm afraid as she's your wife, you've kind of got to respect that? Or, as married couple, meet halfway. Find a compromise. Many women aren't into being too crazy sex wise, but you know, it can still be good. Perhaps you're looking at things very negatively at the moment and it's probably not wise to be rash at this point.

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