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I broke up with my ex six months ago after being a horrible person to him and treating him very badly, oftentimes i would see his face pop up on my snapchat feed and it's making me insanely sad but yet i feel like if i remove him from snapchat it will be over and i dont know if i'm ready... what do you think
You broke up with this guy so isn't it already over? I don't do Snapchat, but is there a setting on there for ignore?
It is, but since I was so horrible to him, I wanted to like be on good terms with him and try to keep a friendly relationship with him, that way I could have made up to him the best that I could. He removed and blocked me from Facebook but he still has me on Snapchat. And I know he sees my Snaps and I know that some of the snaps he is posting are specifically meant for me (like, he never posts selfies and now he does, like to show me what i'm missing) stuff like that. It's an endless circle. I want to remove him from snap and move on but I feel that if I do, my odds of repairing what I've broken will be gone forever.
"...I was so horrible to him, I wanted to like be on good terms with him and try to keep a friendly relationship with him..."
"... my odds of repairing what I've broken will be gone forever."
So... you were horrible to him and you broke up with him, but you'd like to keep him on-tap, just in case you decide that you'd like to be horrible to him again?
Or do you just like seeing his Snaps occasionally so you can revisit the drama of your horribleness and the break-up?
delete him off all social media and focus on yourself, it's not healthy if you seeing him is making you feel sad.
I know. That's what I wanted to do, but I feel like I owe him in a way since I behaved so badly. Having him still connected somewhere could allow me to somehow make it up to him in the future. But if I remove him, it will be all over for good and I don't want to live with remorses ...
CLEAN BREAK IS THE HEALTHIEST THING YOU CAN DO FOR HIM AND FOR YOURSELF. DISTANCE AND TIME WILL HEAL ALL WOUNDS.
if he's a good man, then shape up and treat him right. otherwise cut him out of your life. he deserves better and you need to grow more. clinging onto this half-ass relationship is stupid and bad for your mental health.
How about talk to him and try to sort it out? Or at least get a closure. If you feel sorry for something apologize at least you will feel better as he forgives you.
What did you do to the guy? How did you treat him bad? That's what I want to know.
Well, I didn't hurt him physically obviously. I was just very selfish and self-centered and I didn't pay enough attention when he was hurting from my bad behavior. I'm a horrible person. I still have feelings for him but I know I won't spend my life with him. I just feel bad.
Thank you. It's perfectly normal. So many women like me out there treating their partner like crap, because they're being so nice to us and we take advantage of it. That's what I did for a reason I can never understand, and it feels horrible afterwards.
If you know that you acted badly why not try to improve yourself for the better? Maybe you can patch things up..
That's what I'm doing now. I think I've learned the lesson and I'm working on myself. I never had a good representation of what love was in my household, I'm not saying that excuses anything but that definitely played a role with how I behaved with my ex. I was told men weren't worth it and you had to play them.
yea its not the end of the world :)
you can always make things up if you want :)
selfish how though?
you sure you deserve the guilt your giving yourself?
I probably do. I mean obviously he made mistakes too but for me that was a whole pattern that overshadowed our entire relationship. I was never happy nor satisfied, I was highly sarcastic all the time, I think I was just projecting my uneasiness and insecurities on him while all he was asking for was to be loved.
its okay.
cant you just speak to him about how you feel?
i understand you wanting to make it up with him :) and thats great
its great you care more about him, i wouldnt put so much pressure on yourself though
its clear you mean well now, so you can forgive yourself
but if you do get the chance to talk to him then do it, but if you cant, then dont worry so much about it
life goes on