Should i pursue her?

I know this is long. But I really need the help. From anyone who can. Thanks guys.

I met a girl a few months ago. We had a bit of rocky start, but were both interested in eachother. We talked and flirted lots, went out on a date, and I kind of blew it. She's the first girl I've ever been "serious" about. I apologized and she gave me a second chance, but she was so tied up with school not long after that I couldn't see her... and she lost interest. It was complicated from the start, we'd have LONG conversations into the wee morning about everything. I felt like we were further ahead than we were but over time she seemed less and less inclined to bother with me.

And then she tells me she's seeing someone..but they've only been on one date. I basically asked her to say it's over so I could move on but she leaves me hanging saying no there's nothing but I have a sliver of a chance. Then a week or so later, I go through with my belated halloween party. And she decides to show, all sexed up. I couldn't fault her for it. What bothered me though was that she started getting affectionate with me after having a few. She was leaning against my back for support and holding onto my sweater hood I helped her gain her balance. We then went to play poker and we exchanged some pretty powerful eye contact. She started trying to see my hand by pulling my cards from me. And then it was like something clicked and she was gone. My friend noticed and asked her about it, and she said she didn't notice a thing. I said we could be friends, but I haven't talked to her since she dumped me, but she engages me every few days.

She's not the first girl to like me back but she's definitely the first one that's given me some serious time of day because I pursued her. There's something about her I can't get out of my head, though. It's her looks, her personality. Even what makes her ugly. I don't mind because I know I can be ugly too. Point is. I know I'm obsessed with her, but I don't know if it's for a good reason or not. I don't know if I should go after her, because I don't want to scare her away, but I also don't want to lose her to this guy. THIS is important. I think she expected more from me. I'm kind of down on my luck, but things are changing. I'm turning my life around. I want to wait to be in a better place to see if her opinion changes, but like I said, I'm scared that if she is showing interest again now, that I should act on it.

Yes	6
No	11
Maybe (elaborate)	3

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Comments ( 11 )

Darkoil

9 years ago

Doesn't really sound like you dated. Did you even fuck her?

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handsignals

9 years ago

If you are a Cop and she has commited a felony then yes you should pursue her. If not then you on your own because I'm not reading that massive novel you just wrote.

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Fall_leaves

9 years ago

When you say serious, what do you mean? Is she the first girl you've gone on dates with, dated?

I think she's just leading you on, everyone once they have few drinks is friendlier so those advances weren't sincere. She probably likes your attention and until things do get serious with this other guy, she'll have you to string along for the ride

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  First girl I've dated. I know that she was tipsy, and I should take her actions with a grain of salt. But I wasn't just anybody to her. She obviously felt safe to do that with me. I know she is still wishy-washy at best. And maybe she is leading me on.
  
  I just can't sit here though. I can't just fade away and become nothing more than a friend. I want to try again, or at least let her know how I feel and explain my actions. It probably wont change anything, she may even cut contact with me completely, but it's better than this. It's only been a week or so since we stopped seeing eachother and I thought I could move on. I wanted to move on. But she keeps giving me a strand to hold onto.
  
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Nokiot9

9 years ago

She the first woman to give u the time of day? Don't u think ur a bit biased to her then? She's treating u like shit then expecting u to be mr BF when she wants it. Ugh. Now IIM pissed off lol

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canihelpit

9 years ago

Well from my experience I would flirt with peoole i liked until i got tired of waiting around for them to make a serious move. Even if I liked someone that much as you, you can't force yourself on them and you can't force them to like you. It is really up to her now, she either wants you or she doesn't.

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Toball

9 years ago

Ok that last bit confused me "And then it was like something clicked and she was gone. I said we could be friends, but I haven't talked to her since she dumped me, but she engages me every few days." Did she get mad at you at the party? You haven't talked to her but she "engages" you every few days? Could you tell me more details?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  9 years ago
  
  She was being playful at the table when we were playing poker, and I decided to go all in on a bad hand because I knew they had to leave, finished my drink and it seemed like she was gone before I knew it. I guess what I mean to say is that the playfulness stopped and she was gone without already saying a proper goodbye.
  
  I didn't do or say anything that would make her mad, and no. I haven't initiated any of our conversations recently but she still has. Now I'm worried I'm really losing her. If there was still a chance.
  
  We honestly have an amazing amount of things in common. But I mishandled it.
  
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RoseIsabella

9 years ago

Beatles – Let It Be

When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree
There will be an answer, let it be
For though they may be parted, there is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
There will be an answer, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

And when the night is cloudy there is still a light that shines on me
Shine until tomorrow, let it be
I wake up to the sound of music, Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah, let it be
There will be an answer, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

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- donteatstuffoffthesidewalk
  
  9 years ago
  
  john lennon were a wifebeater
  
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  - handsignals
    
    9 years ago
    
    if you were married Yoko you would be to.
    
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Are You Normal?

Should i pursue her?