Should i get back with my ex or not? iin?

I am so torn about getting back with my ex. During our rocky stage at the end of the relationship, I wasn't feeling him anymore and wanted something better. He was a great bf don't get me wrong but there were stuff about him that I wasn't into and there were stuff that I wish he did possess in terms of personality. Eventually he noticed when we would hang out I would be distant and not cuddly so it got rocky, I confessed what was going on then I guess it became a mutual break up although it was me who initiated it and if it wasn't for me and my unhappiness, he would've stayed with me. So I was single ready to mingle, had sucha great time, made new friends, partied, do what I wanted to do. So I don't regret breaking up with him but I started to feel like I needed comfort from someone who does really know me, understand me, accepts me and loves me. And that's him. So I would contact him every now and then and the last time we text, he did confess how he wanted to see me, missed me, and how he was talking to another girl. For some reason, talking to another girl doesn't bother me because I'm not being overly confident but I just feel like we are a good match and no boy for me or girl for him can come close to what we had with each other.
I am back home where we met and I want to hang out with him and see where we stand. Maybe sparks will happen again or it'll be completely dull and realize okay we have moved on. In the beginning I said I felt like I could find something better and I still feel that way. But here's the torn part. I was in like two flings after breaking up with him and we have stuff in common that me and my ex don't. We like to drink and have fun while my ex is more conservative and traditional. What turned me off about my last fling though is he smoked 24/7 cigs and did drugs and I just couldn't hook up with him like sex. I honestly felt like I was catching an STD or I was gonna get secondary cancer. I felt dirty around him. But he was a cool guy who liked the same things that I did, too. So I can get a little wild which is what I have to work on if I decide to go back with him. OR I can stay single and wait for someone who is also outgoing like my fling and a good bf like my ex. I'm 21 so I am young and feel like I shouldn't be in a rush to find someone but whats hurrying me up is my ex can't be friends with me. He says he only wants me to be his girl and that's it. So I find it devastating that if I want him as a best friend, he's not gonna be there and I will lose someone important in my life. So its like okay to not lose someone important I just have to be with him in a relationship. OR super gain strength and try to move on. Help?