Sexually attracted to women/emotionally to attracted men

18 Comments

I'm a guy. When I meet a cool guy, I wish to myself that I will become close friends with him. When I meet a cute chick, I think to myself, 'I wonder if she'd let me fuck her'. I've had sex with both. Women are by far, more interesting to me in terms of my sexual desire. But I have never met a chick that made me want to be friends with her, unless there was potential for sex. If I had to put myself into a "percentage" in order to explain what I'm babbling about, I'd say I'm:

90% sexually into girls
10% sexually into guys
90% emotionally into guys
10%-30% emotionally into girls

I'm more upset about past relationships with my guys friends who were NOT sexually evolved with me, than any of my past girlfriends. I'm actually glad to get rid of my ex girlfriends.

Labels are stupid, but sometimes I wish there was a term for someone like me. It would be easier to explain myself when meeting new people.

Am I in serious denial here?

You are really gay and in denial	20
You are just bisexual.	62
You have just not met the right girl yet	26
You probably have "mommy issues" that you're not dealing with	3
I don't blame you...even women hate women!	14
Other?	20

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Comments ( 18 )

erwcat

12 years ago | pl

one word:homoromantic
look it up
it means you want to hold hands and go to movies and kiss and cuddle with a guy
it's awesome
i'll be you ''friend''
*moves closer*

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- Jiovanie
  
  12 years ago
  
  You have it.
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  8 years ago
  
  Well, I'm not sure I wanna hold hands with guys. And I've never really been in to kissing guys either. I do like sucking penis. But not nearly as much as fucking pussy. I also like kissing girls . It's just this friendship-y kind of feeling that I get with guys but never with women. I'll look up that word "homoromantic now and see what's up.
  
  Thanks for the tip!
  
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thetimeofyourlife

12 years ago

It struck me that you could be a little sexist. Its like you view men as interesting and likeable but women as just objects to play out your sexual desires. Maybe you need to alter the way you see women to emotionally attach to them

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  12 years ago
  
  I would have to agree/admit that I am most likely, a sexist son of a bitch. I worry about this all the time.
  
  I would love to "alter the way I see women to emotionally attach to them"
  That's my problem!!!
  I can't do that!
  My feelings towards women have developed over YEARS of past experiences and observations.
  If there was a magic button I could push to change this about myself...I'D PUSH IT!
  
  Thanks for your response though. I appreciate you taking the time.
  
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Jiovanie

12 years ago

Well if we HAD to give a label, you're straight unless you also like being with men in terms of relationship the you are bisexual. In my opinion, you are just a human being. Sexuality is very flimsy and fluid; sexuality is also imagined, it isn't real. You can't touch gay or straight or bi, or others. You can touch a gay guy, but you cant see or touch gay. You like your sexual needs satisfied by women, but you prefer the company of a guy. You lust for women, but love men. I'd say you just do what you want, everyone is like that to a degree.

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dappled

12 years ago

This is an interesting post. One thing I wonder about, though, is that you interchange emotional involvement and friendship as terms. What is your relationship with the men you have an emotional attraction to? Are you friends with them or are you in love with them? Is it a romantic thing?

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  12 years ago
  
  That's kind of a grey area for me. When I become emotionally/friendship-wise close with a dude, it can feel like a romantic connection. This can be true REGARDLESS if I have slept with them or not. It's happened in both ways with me before.
  
  With women, like I said before, I'm usually just in it for the sex. I've never had an emotional connection with any of my girlfriends in the past.
  
  I would love to meet a girl that I connect with in more ways than just sexually, but it still hasn't happened yet and I'm beginning to think it never will.
  
  Thank you for your insightful response though. It's appreciated.
  
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  - dappled
    
    12 years ago
    
    When I answered your question this morning, something was intriguing me about it and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Thinking about it again, I've worked it out.
    
    A lot of "straight" men enjoy encounters with other men. They wouldn't class themselves as bi, they would never form an emotional attachment with the other man or probably even want anything much to do with him after they've got what they needed. They are romantically interested in one gender but like physical contact with the other.
    
    And that's you, isn't it? Just the other way around. Frankly, I'm amazed more people aren't like you. Now I've thought about it in those terms, it doesn't seem in the slightest unusual.
    
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Atheist_Cookbook

12 years ago

I feel the same way in that I constantly want to fuck girls but the idea of engaging them on a meaningful level is lost (besides a couple of exceptions). It may sound sexist, but I think guys are more able to engage in honest intellectual conversations than girls are. Then again, maybe most above average attractiveness girls aren't highly intelligent.

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- Jiovanie
  
  12 years ago
  
  Actually this is just more so the fact that Women dont understand men, even if they think they do. Men don't understand women. Neither gender can relate to the other ever, and never will. Girls dont understand why we dont like to cry, we don't understand why they distress about minute issues.
  
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  - Anonymous Post Author
    
    8 years ago
    
    Yes! I'm glad someone admits this!
    
    (Maybe that's what that self help book from the 90's was talking about? "men are from Mars, Women are from Venus")
    
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aimedwrong

12 years ago

Your problem is that you see all females as potential sex. Next time that you meet a girl, pretend that she's in a relationship, gay, asexual, or whatever else will make you think of her as off-limits. When the possibility for sex is gone, your only option is to be friends and maybe you'll see her as a person with a certain personality, and not just an object.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  12 years ago
  
  I've always had the option to be friends with the girls I've met in the past. I just never wanted to. One whiff of their personality and I was gone.
  
  Besides...is that really advice that you would follow yourself? (To pretend that you didn't know a reality, even though you did). Shit. I might as well start blindly following some religion again if that's the case. I cant "trick" myself.
  
  I appreciate your input though.
  
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[Old Memory]

12 years ago

Yeah I prefer women sexually and men romantically. Though I'd be good at romancing a woman, I just don't think there's one out there that could offer me the stability and protection I get from a man. Oh, and I'm just bisexual.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  12 years ago
  
  How and when in your life did you accept this about yourself?
  I'm obviously having problems in this area!
  
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  - [Old Memory]
    
    12 years ago
    
    Well I knew I liked guys and girls since I was 8 or 9 and My Girl came out and I fancied the boy AND the girl. Then at school I had my first crush on a real life girl at 11. I always fancied at least a few guys and girls at school. I never felt like it was something I had to accept it though. For me it was never a problem. I enjoyed liking men and women. I know other people have a problem with it. I'm still not massively open about it. My friends know but I feel new people I meet would judge me. But to be honest no-one I've ever told has ever judged me. Some people have even surprised me by how they reacted because I judged them and thought they were too close minded to accept me for who I am.
    
    I don't know whether you are a guy or a girl, I guess a guy would feel harder to "accept" it due to the social stigma. But as you get older people just get over it.
    
    In the past the only thing I struggled to understand is maybe I am just a lesbian really. But a great friend of mine told me that you don't need to worry about labels. And now I live by that. I just like who I like. There are pros and cons to having a partner of each sex so I don't need to choose that. I just choose whoever I want to spend time with.
    
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KokoroComplex

12 years ago

Is it only physically and no emotions at all? If then,I think you're steering more into the guys lane if you don't love both sexes at the same.

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Sexually attracted to women/emotionally to attracted men