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What are your thoughts on pre-marital sex? It's rare to find people who are BOTH willing to wait until marriage. Is it prudish to wait? How long is too long? Tell me your thoughts whether it be personal, religious, or based on others.
| Yes, when it's someone you love. | 226 | |
| No, waiting is the way to go. | 87 | |
| It all depends on how long you're willing to wait. | 41 | |
| No sex? Dealbreaker! | 89 | |
| Undecided | 23 |
The term "sex before marriage" gets on my damn nerves. Its like assuming all people have to get married and should follow some religious or personal beliefs that other people believe in. If someone feels like they have to be in love or married to have sex, fine, that's their business, though many people will disagree with it or think its pointless. If people want to experience sex with several people before they get married that's fine too. If people want to have all sorts of freaky sex with all sorts of freaky people and never get married, that is also fine. People will always disagree about the when's and why's of sex because some were raised to believe certain things about it and some came to conclusions on their own and everything in between. My opinion in short is that sex is great, have it when you want to. Marriage is not necessary for nookie.
Exactly. Why should we need to prove our love by a bit of paper? Surely we don't need to get married to justify that we love someone so much we want to have sex and have a family? So what, one day you're engaged and it's totally forbidden to have sex and the next day everything suddenly changes and it's okay? What is this magical change? It's bullshit. No one should have to prove to society that they're ready to have sex with someone or ready to love someone.
Why isn't there an option for people who think it's ok to have sex with people you're not in love with? I'm fine with people having casual sex. It all depends on what's healthy for you and what you want.
You test drive a car before buying it? Then you should have sex before marriage! End of story
Wait... I think that marriage is silly and do not EVER plan to actually marry (having a family is a completely different matter). So I am not supposed to have sex? O.o
Also, I've never felt this emotional bonding that you speak of. To me sex is just sex. But then again I'm not too good with bonding and emotions and I tend to rationalise everything.
And please don't get me started on what I think of love...
Sex before marriage is a must! I know several virgin who got married and ended up cheating on their spouses since they wanted to know what to was like to be with someone else. People who have had other sexual relationships tend to find it easier to settle down with one person as they have lived their lives and know what its like to be with different people.
Also, you wouldnt buy a pair of shoes without trying them on first right? So why would you marry someone when you have no clue whether or not you are sexually compatible?
Personally, I have never understood people who waited for a paper given by the church or registry office in order to have sex or other physical or emotional activities. But then again, I am an atheist and I consider sex to be neither dirty nor holy.
Doesn't matter either way to me.
Being married doesn't always guarantee that the Father of your child won't leave you when the baby won't stop crying and you can't cook him dinner every night. I've seen good Mormon women who did everything the right, Mormon way and married men that had good jobs and were morally upstanding members of the priesthood end up as poor single Mothers.
That would be my #1 concern with sex before marriage, what happens if a kid becomes involved? However, to ban it would further the meaninglessness of marriage, because then you'd have people getting married just to have sex. I've seen how that works out. Marriage isn't a guarantee of anything anymore and birth control fails. People don't take it seriously anymore, so while I think that it's a smart idea to wait until you're in a committed relationship or at least know the person well enough before having sex, waiting until marriage to have sex can cause a lot more problems then it could solve.
I think people should use their best judgement and take responsibility for the consequences, but I don't think anyone should have to wait until marriage.
Are you a Christian? That's true,having sex itself means that there lies a connection between those who do it. They could say it's casual but the connection is there and it's made. Having sex with the one who you truly love would be reasonable but within talks of religion, if it's unconditional then no matter how long they should be willing enough to wait.
I voted undecided. In my faith adultery is something to be avoided. And I get why. First of all, even science will say that when you have sex with a woman, there is some sort of emotional marriage or bonding, we've all heard this in different ways, but at its barebones, that's what it is. Whatever is happening, sex always makes things more confusing, once you have sex it's harder to walk away from relationship or recover it if something goes wrong. Basically we end up with a lot of people bitter and hurt, never speaking to eachother again. This is why I will wait for marriage, even though I think when you feel a genuine LOVE not likeness toward someone, so strong you could marry them that day, that it might be okay. However I feel like if that were the case, I would have the patience to wait. In the end I'd think I'd wait for marriage.
Sex is a natural part of life. I dont see how a piece of paper makes it suddenly OK to have sex. As if married life is smooth sailing...as if!
Sex id definitely something to be respected. I mean I dont advocate going out a sleeping with everyone ( this goes for both men and women)as there is the chance of disease and of course, of one party getting their feeling hurt if they become emotionally invested in the other partner (trust me, men get attached to sexual partners as well its not just us women). But if you meet someone and you have a nice relationship with them and you love them, it doesnt matter if your married or not. Also, if you and your sexual partner both agree to a sex only relationship and can deal with that all the more power to you! What happens between consenting adults is not the business of anyone especially "god" who may or may not exist at this point.
And if he does exist I doubt a supreme being who created the entire universe would give a shit less about who is sleeping with who as long as no one is getting hurt.
The thing is, people have to indicator of when is a good time to have sex, and often infatuation is what leads to it, not love. A so you still have the problem of people making these really intimate connections without knowing if they love eachother or not, which may lead to severe heartbreak. You can make the arguement that if two individuals have endured and grown together for lets say 3 years or so and will have sex within that time then they certainly don't NEED to be married. But they might as well be. The way I see marriage is that it's a commitment to another person, and if things get tough, they will try help each other. You can't say as long as no one gets hurt, because they will or if you can handle an only sex relationship all the power to ya, because most people can't. In the land of what-if's sure. But thats not reality. I feel like I've exhausted myself on the subject to all of which I know. Thanks for the response though, no hard feelings.
My wife and I had sex the first day we met. It was amazing then ans even better now. Absolutely yes!
"No sex before marriage" is one of the stupidest ideas one can think of. No, really, that's just religious bullsh*t.
Not everyone should have to wait based on someone elses religious views or opinions, and I would never want to force others to, but for me it's a personal choice and I am waiting until I'm married.
well know in days it doesn't matter because first of all your getting married and who cares how long you wait you have to respect her in the way she wants to nothing is afforded..
I'm not religious and love sex. Why wait? If you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with you might as well start love making early. Enjoy every moment together that you are given. And like I said, sex fucking rules.
Whts wrong in it, I have already fucked my girlfriend a thousand times, i stuff my dick in her mouth every fuckin day nd night!
what is wrong with sex you should enjoy sex when you can its a natural thing just enjoy
When I was still a virgin i thought that having sex would be this huge deal and it could ruin relationships if you had it too early or when you weren't ready. I tried to force myself to not have sex with my boyfriend for at least a month after we started dating, (we lasted three weeks before I gave in to my desires) and you know what? sex didn't change a single thing. other than make me less cranky...
It didn't feel like this big emotional bonding thing, and I'm still with the boyfriend three years later (we're actually getting married) so I do kinda regret not having sex earlier.
It's up to the individual. Noone has the right to dictate to anyone whether or not they should have sex before marriage. xxx
It is up to the person of course but I've always wondered about the waiting part. What if you did and only found out that you and your partner were totally incompatible? I get why one might wait until they were sure this is a relationship going somewhere (marriage). But isn't sex part of what you want to know about a person before the marriage?
What kind of a prat came up with the idea of not having sex until you married somebody? And what kind of a monumental moron actually does that!?!? I mean...COME ON!!!
I think you should wait till you're in love, not necessarily marriage. Marriage is just a symbol to show everyone, including yourselves, that love exists between you two.
However, if you feel like having sex with anyone and not waiting till marriage, I won't judge nor do I see it as a problem. It's you're life, live it the way you want.