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Is it normal to give countless chances to your loved one and suddenly just reach a point where not only you can't or won't give them another chance but also lose any kind of feeling for them? As in there not being even a hint of it left, as if you've disconnected from them completely?
| yes | 21 | |
| no | 8 |
One time, one chance; never more.
Without trust no relationship can survive, so if the trust is broken, the relationship is doomed. No matter how many chances you try, the relationship was finished after the first breach of trust, period.
So you've hit the end of your rope, not realizing it ended long ago. Normal, I'd say.
I agree with that, however I never follow it. I'm the type that gives one, two, ten, 20 chances. Then suddenly I just have nothing left to say to the person in question. Then I wonder, what if they had done just the right thing on the 19th chance? Or if there had been a 21st, would it have been the one? Deep down I know the 21st time is not exactly the charm, but I just keep holding on to the feelings I have for them, until the moment they just become pointless in my life and there is no good left.
From experience I know that it is not a good idea to give infinite chances in relationships. The other one end up taking you for granted. It's sometimes best to start on a blank page even if in the beginning it hurts.
I think it's possible, it's a bit like an empty feeling and those feelings of love are only reignited when you're together. The memories are what you have to feel good about and being able to reminisce with that old flame is nice. They don't completely die away, it's like the seasons it comes and goes but somewhere deep down that person always had a place in your heart.
To me it reaches a point where those feelings could only be reignited with a lot of effort on the other person's part. Anything less than that is just not enough.
I think it's pretty much over, it's just the old feelings and emotions that can be rekindled, there's nothing left to actually make it last, but there are those exceptions. I know some couples can make it work after years of being apart and the timing is just right but for most it's just a broken heart and we're out for good.
For me the feelings disappear and a very deep resentment takes place... I don't want to see, hear of/from, etc. from the person in question. I find it very puzzling that what seemed to be my truest loves would become meaningless people that I wish I had never even known.
I'm sorry, but that just reeks of desperation and the fear of being alone. As I said, the poison has already infected the relationship, so no amount of re-ignition will actually save it. Prolong it a while, perhaps, but not save it.
While I agree, I have a damned hard time letting go. But, like I said, all of a sudden, it's just over for me. It only takes me being hurt about 20 times. lol. Yeah, it makes me feel stupid, but at the same time I think it's better than staying forever at least...