Please help. is this normal. am going nuts about her

10 Comments

I work with this girl for almost 1 year and I don't have her number. She and I flirt with each other. I am not even sure if she have a boyfriend or not. I have tried to ask her out to the movies or to come shopping with me but she keep dodging it. Am not good at talking to girls. Infact, am 26 years old and I am a virgin. This girl drive me crazy and I want to get to know her better and eventually give her my virginity. Please help. I want a very good and long future with this girl. I want this girl to be my first and last girlfriend.
Someone out there who has been in a situation like this please help me 😭

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Comments ( 10 )
  • [Old Memory]
    6 years ago

    What job do you have? You should approach her and talk about job stuff then ask her out.

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  • lonewolf1253
    6 years ago

    Ask her out. Simple as that. Nothing ventured nothing gained. If she says yes, great. If she says no, then you can stop obsessing about her and keep shopping around.

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  • Owl_Girl
    6 years ago

    A lot of people felt like you at some point, and it's normal. However, you may be expecting way too much from her and this possible relationship, and I feel like you are loosing contact with reality and relying too much on this possibility on an emotional level. I do think you should ask her out, but adjusting your expectations before that might be a good idea. If she is not interested, it's not the end of the world. You would still be able to meet many other girls in your life who are able to inspire similar feelings. Besides, you don't even know her all that well. I think going into any relationship with such expectations is a bad idea, but even more so when you don't know the person at more intimate level. If you are afraid of not finding anymore else after her, I recommend starting to invest a little more of your free time on places where you can meet people with shared interests, or even relationship sites. There are a lot of different types of places and dating sites/spots. One of them may suit you.

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  • rayb12
    6 years ago

    Tell her she should hang out with you

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    • Batman1991
      6 years ago

      I tried to ask her out before Thanksgiving she never replied. I even waited the whole day she still didn't replied. Maybe she forgot.After Thanksgiving I tried again to ask her out however she said she had a Thanksgiving dinner date with her mom. However when I asked her what she do after work she said she go home and go to sleep or she hangs out at home I hesitate from time to time I struggle to ask her out. She seem like an outgoing girl someone who's out of my league. someone who goes out and get what she wants. But at work she flirts with me and I flirt back. I even did research on this topic and found that it's called bantering. So I'm confused whether she's into me or not or maybe she is leading me on it's hard for me.

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  • LuxM4G
    6 years ago

    My advice is that you lose your virginity to someone else, unless she is a virgin too or that she'd really like to be your first and maintain a long lasting relationship with you. Just have sex with someone else and then use that confidence to ask her out again. Analyze her really thoroughly before you commit yourself emotionally to her, you must be so clouded from not having sex before and not being socially adept with other girls that your judgment might be impaired on this one. Just saying, i don't really know either of you to pass judgment.

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    • Batman1991
      6 years ago

      Yeah about this I'm not a very confident guy I'm shy around girls. But this girl at work she drives me crazy she gets me angry at the end of the day I'm no longer angry at her instead I'm even more in love with her. This feeling overwhelmed with me so when you tell me to lose my virginity to someone else and use the experience and try this with her it'll be impossible for me to do such a thing is there any other advice.

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      • LuxM4G
        6 years ago

        Focus dude, haven't you payed any attention to what i have told you? Your a romantic, and that's against you right now, you need to be a realist. She's just another girl, and nothing will change in your heart if you lose your virginity to another woman because then you'll know for sure that you have deep feelings for her and aren't just clouded in a mix of uncontrollable emotions.

        This woman, she knows your onto her... Do you know if she's shy or coy? If she's a romantic or a realist? How much do you really know about her? Do some research, follow her on social media, you need to approach and study her. When you know her enough, after becoming her friend, then you can start courting her. You need to start developing some insight and hindsight. This infatuation you have for her is not racional, and emotions cannot control your reasoning. You'll most likely end up hurt if you don't tread carefully, you have to be cool about it, just like a predator in the hunt for prey.

        Its not normal that you still haven't lost your virginity as twenty six, being a man. Some women might find it attractive, but most don't, especially if your not successful enough in your professional life. It's all wrong to begin with because she's your coworker, unless your her superior. Go to the gym, study hard, empower your mind and body, feel the power rushing through your veins, be the dominant force. Award yourself with some recreational fun, go to some parties, smoke a joint or two, drink a couple of beverages.

        I don't know either of you, so i can't pass judgment like i said in the previous post. Just be sure that she's in your league or that you at least have chances to fulfill her romantic and sexual life. I personally think that you should start searching for other priorities in your life and look like you don't care about her anymore. Be pragmatic about it, there are some things that you can control and some that you don't, hold on to the ones you can. It's time you either make it into a man or break it trying to, do you understand? Now stop mopping about it and go get her tiger, show that you are worth of her respect and devotion. If you fail, your honor and self-respect is still untainted for you have stood loyal to your principles and tried your best. Best of luck to you buddy.

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        • Batman1991
          6 years ago

          Thank you Luxm4g, this is just the kind of talk I needed in fact I'm going to follow your advice and step up to the next level thank you.

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          • LuxM4G
            6 years ago

            Hey, your welcome mate. You have to start believing in yourself, you can do whatever you set your mind into, for as long as you believe in your potential to achieve great accomplishments. If she's not worthy of your affection then its her loss, plenty of alot more fishes in the sea.

            You'll find a strong, caring, loving woman in your life for sure, this might just not be the one, but you won't know for sure until you try to conquer her heart. Never change your nature in order to please a woman, you got to stick with your own kind. Attraction between humans is pretty much instantaneous in most cases through a conversation, voice tone and body language, but in some infatuation grows with time, hence why you need to devote some time into a friendship in order to know if that little seed of mutual respect and caring develops into something bigger.

            If you ever lose someone you loved and cared about, because you most likely will like all of us, just remember that "tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all" to quote Alfred Lord Tennyson. Never give up on your pursuit for true love, but for the moment be a realist and play the field for a while until you get used to it. When that woman you thought was your true love goes away, remember to let go of her respectfully and move on with your life, because day by day it gets better. Whenever you need to find yourself between relationships, give yourself time and nurture your body and mind. Allright, cheers bro.

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