Older husband doesnt want anymore kids...

63% Normal
12 Comments

I am 24 years old and have three children.

My oldest lives with his father/my ex husband and I rarely if ever see him, yes...its aweful and no I dont need anynoe to address this issue or b**ch at me and tell me I am a terrible mother... it is a long story I wont get into now.

My other two children, my daughters are my world. I love them so much and my life is complete becuase of them. They are both under the age of 3 btw.

I met my now husband almost five years ago and we were married last year after dating and living together and having our two daughters. We got married becuase we love each other dearly and also it is the best choice for our family, two married parents, insurance and monitary assurance for the girls incase something should happen. It was the right thing to do, to move forward and be official.

My Husband is nearly 14 years older than I am. He has two children from a previous marriage that are practically grown and now our two younger daughters...he doesnt want any more children. He wants to be able to stop working and relax someday.

We both agree'd with our last child we were done having children for that reason. But I have to admit deep down I want more kids...but I think it is unfair of me to ask that of him with his age beign a factor. I feel depressed thinking I wont have any more kids or be pregnant again or maybe someday have another son. Any advice and is this normal???

Voting Results
63% Normal
Based on 51 votes (32 yes)
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Comments ( 12 )
  • AverageTMcFlannigan
    15 years ago

    It sounds like you two made a good decision. Four kids should be plenty, and with your daughters being under three years old you're still in for a long ride on the parenting bandwagon.

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  • RonOnTheRock
    14 years ago

    Any idiot who thinks we are over populated has never looked out the window of an airplane at "flyover country". I'm 43M, 3kids, and my older wife and I would LOVE to have more. Sure, I'd like to relax, but I don't trust anyone or any amount of money to take care of me when I'm old. You might want to ask your husband if he can find any older person who regrets having had too many kids. I guarantee you'll have an easier time finding older folks who wish that they had had more.

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  • rainmay
    14 years ago

    talk to them about it

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  • alexisfreak
    14 years ago

    You're 24? You want more kids. Jesus Mother of Christ.

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  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    The way I see it, you're the woman and have control on this more than he does. If you HAD to have another kid, you could always "fake" taking the pill and just get pregnant that way.

    I'm really happy you are taking his view into this decision and respect his concerns toward having another kid. I joked with my fiance about getting a vasectomy after two but I am more serious than she believe. However, I'm in a committed relationship and I don't mind being honest and open to ideas with her.

    If she truly wanted more than two and we talked it out, I care about her opinion so we would most likely have more. However, I feel my opinion should matter to her as well.

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  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    Well I guess you are pretty young by today's standards to have already had 3 child births. And while the biological you is ready for more, the social & financial side of that is another matter.

    There is no right answer - but there are 5 children, when you count your husband's, on the scene to whom you can devote all your attention and resources. Maybe focus on that. Talk to your husband a bit more if you feel you need to, but do make all of what you have, including yourself.

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  • Bubear50
    14 years ago

    I am 53 years old and all my children are grown. I think you wanting more children is honorable but you are cheating yourself out of a much happier and enriching experience. "Grandchildren"

    These babies will effect you in ways you have no idea they can. And believe it or not your relationship with them will be much closer than with your then adult children.

    Also your husband is over a decade older than you. He is tired. He is looking forward to retirement and he WANTS to enjoy his grandbabies. Consider his feelings in this also.

    I hope I have given you something to think about. God Bless

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  • andrian007
    15 years ago

    It's normal to want more children, but before that happens, don't you have quite a few children already? The other thing is you may not realise it now, but parenting is about to get very expensive for you. You think it's cheap now, wait till they go to university, get married, buy a car and a house. When you realise the amount of money you're about to spend, that might make you think again.

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  • smiler
    15 years ago

    Consider yourself lucky that you have 3 kids already with 2 beautiful girls to have with you, to love and to love you. Some people don't have the good fortune to even have one.
    your hormones are taking over wait a few years and reassess the situation, your still young.

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  • lonergirl
    15 years ago

    i think its gross ppl having so many children we're so overpopulated its so irresponsible.
    you have people in your life you feel love for just be happy.

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    • Punx93
      14 years ago

      We're hardly overpopulated. I haven't seen anywhere where there isn't enough housing and in this country there is plenty of food. And if she can afford to have children leave her alone. Honestly if anything is gross it's how people can get abortions and then brag/laugh about them later.

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  • biblebashingtreehugger
    15 years ago

    you probably want more children because of negative memories from your 1st child, dont worry about wanting more children its only natural for you because you feel as if your children are growing up fast and you will miss them, dont worry about it and enjoy having them in your life.

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