Not sure if he's cumming when we have sex?

51% Normal
20 Comments

Ok, so we've had sex several times and he *seems* to be coming sometimes (and I've definitely felt the pre-ejaculation present, if that factors in at all here). A couple of times I asked him afterward if he had come or not and he said "yes". For some reason, I didn't believe him. So I started checking the condoms in the garbage can later on and they always seem to be empty. I thought of the possibility that maybe they were upside down so all the action spilled out, but I didn't see any real evidence of that. Believe me, I would be happy to do whatever is necessary to make him a happy camper. But I really don't know him well enough to feel comfortable/appropriate to ask him about this personal issue. I've definitely given him some blowjobs which he seemed to enjoy, but then we've always finished with sex. Maybe he just seriously takes a super long time and we end up stopping before he's finished? I really don't know. So, my questions are these:

Do you think he's lying about coming, or is he maybe finishing but nothing comes out (is that even possible)?

Do you think maybe he just doesn't come and that's normal for some guys and he just doesn't want to talk about it?

If he's not coming because we're not doing the right kinds of activities to get him off, why wouldn't he tell me what he wants (or show me) so that we can both fully enjoy it when we have sex?

I'm trying not to take i personally, but...

Voting Results
51% Normal
Based on 88 votes (45 yes)
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Comments ( 20 )
  • Maddie
    17 years ago

    "But I really don't know him well enough to feel comfortable/appropriate to ask him about this personal issue." Okay, so this man has put his cock inside you SEVERAL times and you don't feel it's appropriate to ask him anything "personal?" That's a bit twisted in my opinion. You should have gotten to know him before you two started screwing around in the first place.

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    • snop_mat
      17 years ago

      I think asking this guy what the deal is would not be an easy thing to do, regardless of how long they waited to have sex, how many times they've had sex, etc. I think saying "What's your problem, why can't you come and why are you lying to me about it?" would not be an easy question to ask for most people, and would not even be easy to put into better words possibly.

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      • Maddie
        17 years ago

        Yes, you do have a point. But having sex is a very intimate act, unless this is just a fling. I think she should just ask him, and be truthful. She doesn't have to ask him harshly, because she is worried about how much HE is enjoying himself. Since they have had sex a few times, I think she is entitled to know this. Instead of looking up information about it on the internet, get it straight from the source. Who knows, he may even think she is just being considerate to his needs.

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  • blue_burr
    11 years ago

    Just suck his dick long and hard till he cums all over you. Or whack him off till he cums.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    This situation happens to me too and I asked him about it, he just says it's such a new experience that he can't actually cum inside me, and I wouldn't blame him as I find it hard to orgasm during sex as it's so good. Sometimes it can b a little saddening but u just need to ask him gently about it and take his answer as the truth.

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  • strody
    16 years ago

    Injaculation,never heared of it.Is that when your cum goes back inside your cock

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  • clownkiller
    16 years ago

    im sure he likes wat ur doing or if not he doesn't want to tell you bcuz he'll feel like a pervert and doesnt want u to break up with him. maybe u shuld give him the controls and let him try some stuff. wen u take control try new positions that you will both enjoy. maybe he doesn't cum like u said and doesn't want to feel akward

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  • feelssogood
    16 years ago

    ok lemme tell you some guys take a long time i take six hours and somtimes i just say i cum so she dont have to feel bad we went one time and she had 46 orgasams and passed out before i finished so i got off of her and cuddled we woke up the next morning and i told her that i did get done(even tho i didnt) and we just cuddled for the rest of the morning

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  • comalies
    16 years ago

    maybe you dont turn him on enough to make him ejaculate...or maybe he's cheating on you therefore has nothing left to ejaculate.

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  • Metal_Guy
    17 years ago

    It may be that he doesn't actually like coming - believe it or not, some guys prefer not to. He may be faking because he actually enjoys the feeling before coming more than he does the ejaculation itself. You might just b plesing him just right for him - so bear that in mind...

    He might also have a guilt complex about coming or feel that he wouldn't be satisfying you if he came - if he seems like a very unselfish lover, then that's a possibility. You could get him over said guilt by encouraging him to think of sex as something that he's welcome to enjoy as much as you - maybe have a night that's 'all about him' as it were, to show him that you actually like pleasing him.

    If you can feel the pre-ejaculation, then you certainly needn't worry about whether you're pleasing him, and there's no need to take it personally. It's much more likely to be psychological hang-ups or a preference for not coming. Whatever it is, I certainly advise talking about it with him - be very gentle and encourage him to be open with you. Good communication is the root of a good relationship.

    Best of luck.

    Metal Guy.

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    • humble_dude
      17 years ago

      Yeap, I agree with this dude

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  • kristina_696969
    17 years ago

    Think she needs to jack him off until he blows some time.

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    • Ryan556
      11 years ago

      No most girls suck at that sorry but true she should check if she's good if not most are descant at blowjobs sorry but also true

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    • blakelovejoy
      16 years ago

      i agree

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  • kristina_696969
    17 years ago

    Check the end of the rubber and see if there is a hole in it...maybe he blew his load in you!

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    • humble_dude
      17 years ago

      thats another possibility, you should be careful

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  • humble_dude
    17 years ago

    I can cum without ejaculating, is called injaculation, but you do it knowing what you are doing, it doesn t just happen.
    I say just ask him, I am a guy, and it is a normal question to ask.

    PS: Is better to talk about this things with a "few glasses of wine at night", not in the bedroom after sex, it kills the mood.

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    • snop_mat
      17 years ago

      Injaculation? Never heard of such a thing. So you do it on purpose, but you don't have to, it's just something you choose to do for some reason every now and again? And don't you think it would make sense to bring it up after it happens after they have sex? Seems like that would be the most appropriate time and not over a casual drink?!

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      • humble_dude
        17 years ago

        Hehe, yeap, you can do it by exercising your "PC muscle" with "Kegel exercises".
        Its an ancient practice, and the reason for it is for enhancing orgasm, and being able to have more than one orgasm in a non-stop session.

        Multiorgasms are not just for women, Im not saying Im an expert, but I have had 3 or 4 orgasms in a row, without going flacid.

        If this is the case, it makes no sense hidding it, Im saying is just a possibility.

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  • roysta
    17 years ago

    Just suck his cock hard for 2-3 hours, if he doesnt come then have a doctor on hand...

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