Not sure how i feel about a long distance relationship anymore?

I've been in this long distance relationship with my boyfriend for 10 months now, and we've been doing really well. We got together in April of last year; around four months after he decided that we should move on to the next step -- and that's him coming over for a few weeks to be with me during Xmas. About October, I ended up feeling absolutely devastated he couldn't visit. His whole reason was stupid and it really got me angry. He had 200 dollars saved for his plane ticket (It's 450 back and forth together) on crap with friends. Though he explained how bad he felt, and how he knew he shouldn't do it and that it was to visit me -- I was really upset. But he felt bad enough..so I hide how hurt I was so he wouldn't feel awful. We made second plans, for him to come before the 14th of Feb.
I don't know when and if he'll even get here. I'm having trouble hanging on. I feel like I'm getting my hopes up for nothing because I need something solid planned out. He has to give a two week notice at work before he can take go out of state anywhere etc, and he has to buy the ticket three to ten days before the day he wants to leave.
I ask him how it's going and he says it's going pretty well/decent. I feel doubtful and he tells me that, "Don't worry darling, I'm going to be there." But I don't know /when/. I feel like I'm being too impatient and demanding. It could just be a few weeks more when he'll be here, most likely, but I don't know because things aren't /solid/ and I'm feeling so different.
It was around a few months ago, feelings came to the surface -- I don't mind waiting for him if it'll happen, but it's at that time in the relationship where I need to be with him. I need him physically beside me. This long distance thing isn't cutting it. Texting, MSN, webcam Occassionally & calls aren't enough. I want to spend time with him in a specific way & I can't do that -- and therefore I'd just rather not talk to him at all, and be busy all the damn time because that's exactly what I need, but can't have.
I've been feeling so confused and almost as if I'm not sure how I feel about him. I don't feel solid when I say "I love you" or sweet things to him, or when he speaks them to me. /Hugs/ and /Kisses/ just aren't enough.
I've been finding other guys attractive, as if I want to be with them.I wouldn't consider cheating on my boyfriend for I feel that I'm still 'connected' and with him in a sense it's just the entire appeal about these guys I find attractive is that I notice they share some or many qualities that my boyfriend possesses. The fluttery feeling in my chest I get when I'm near a guy I feel enamored by; the talking and laughing, and even playing around, dancing, sitting next to each other. Doing things. I find myself wanting to get close to them. The appeal of feeling enraptured by someone you like that's in front of you, there, and the feeling of being physically with a person. Thinking if you wanted to kiss them, you could. And if they wanted too, you very well could.
I must sound terrible, but I feel frustrated. I'm sick of feeling alone. I'm sick of seeing everyone of my own dear friends have their own LDR or RL relationships and get to see them, right in front of my face. I feel incredibly sad thinking about how I can't be that with my own boyfriend -- the person who often times I just really need by my side, but know he isn't and can't be here right now, and that simply just intensifies the feeling..
I feel like I love him, and that I know that I love him; and that the feelings are very much mutual, yet I feel often lately that mine are on a roller coaster and dampened down. I'm sick of waiting. I don't want to move on -- but I feel as if it won't happen and I'm just on such a short, thin thread, it's hard.
Is this normal? What can I possibly do, do to cope or something? I just don't know how to sort out my feelings. I don't want to do or say something I'll regret because of how mixed up and confused I feel.