Not quite sure what to do..

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6 Comments

So I recently got out of a two year relationship, so I was just going to have fun hanging out with friends and take time off from dating. Well I ended up meeting this guy that I'm really into, so we've been talking a lot lately. Now three of my guy friends are telling me they're in love with me..I don't really know how to reject them nicely. I don't like them in an intimate sort of way at all, but I don't want to ruin the friendship if possible. Any advice?

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85% Normal
Based on 13 votes (11 yes)
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Comments ( 6 )
  • Sensate
    11 years ago

    Be honest about it. I tell you this as a guy. It happens alot that a guy is OK with just friendship, but when you become single again they realise they would want more if they can get it. You should be flattered really.

    Just don't lead them on, because then you'll give them time to develop more intense feelings and expectations. If you like them as friends and nothing more don't make them feel bad about it, but be clear and honest about not wanting anything more.

    Having feelings for a friend that isnt available or doesnt feel the same way isn't all that hard to deal with, no matter what people say. But leadin someone on, because you dont want to be rude or something and then denying him anyway can be horribly painful

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    • Indira
      11 years ago

      Alright, thanks :)

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  • aardvarkaardvark
    11 years ago

    Just tell them you only want a friendship and not any more of a relationship. They'll probably feel a little disappointed but it's the best way to deal with it.

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  • Indira
    11 years ago

    Actually I'm not really enjoying the attention, it's just I don't want to come across as rude or anything if I tell them that I just want to be friends. I understand that I need to say something because it is better, I just don't know how to go about that without ruining the friendship.

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  • plum6
    11 years ago

    just please be honest to them about how you feel. As you already suggested you will probably hurt them a bit at first, but making them believe they have a shot at getting together with you and investing time, effort and emotions in this just to hear that it was all for nothing later on is so much worse. I assume you kinda like the attention they are giving you, but for their sake and to avoid drama later on you should really just be clear about what you want before it gets serious.

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  • ccjigsaw
    11 years ago

    Geez, a few minutes out of a relationship and you've got yourself a male harem. They probably liked you before you were availabe, so now that your single you're top choice. If you're not interested, don't play games and make it clear. If you're interested but not ready. Tell them that. If you are interested, then say it. No need to beat around the bush, just say what needs to be said. Or string them along and enjoy the harem! lol

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