Not content with one relationship

I've been in many relationships, and I always end up breaking up because I feel that I'm not being loyal to my partner. I usually find myself interested in other boys and wanting to pursue relationships with them - IN ADDITION to the one I already have.

It's generally not discontent with my current beau, but I guess I always want the chance to really get to know more people and I feel like I have the capacity to love more than one person at a time. I'm not the jealous type, and obviously wouldn't care if he had other girls he was seeing - though it'd be worse if they were just for sex, and not because he actually cared about them - if he really liked her, I'd probably encourage it.

I've looked into this feeling, and have found articles about Polyamorism that seem similar to what I feel. However when I've tried to talk with my boyfriend about this, he told me I was a nympho, had no real emotions, and it was just wrong.

Is what I'm feeling normal, or do I really have a problem? I don't mean to hurt anyone (especially the boys I date because I really do care about them) but I just want to be able to fully love more than one person, without having to let go of others that I already love.

Voting Results
54% Normal
Based on 63 votes (34 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • avalonis

    It's normal, you just have a lot of love to give around. When you find someone you love who'll be enough for you to handle, THEN settle down. Until then, you'll still be searching.

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  • I think the way you feel is very normal. You are someone who hasn't developed and at this time does not want to develop an exclusive romantic relationship. Why today this is seen in a negative light is beyond comprehension.

    It used to be called dating: going out with different people, and not settling on just one. The pressure to settle & act as husband & wife just reflects ultra conservative views. What a bunch of squares.

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  • koifish

    I used to be like that. I thought no guy was ever good enough. But I stuck with one and after a month or two i realized I got extremely lucky with the best boyfriend in the world. We've been dating almost a year today and the relationship is still alive as it was from the beginning.

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  • Racoon

    I'm gonna give you the not normal comment.

    I am a person that doesn't need much friends and attention and I found an awesome guy and I only feel like I can love ONE person at the time. It's the way I am.

    I see people like you as ''attention-wh*re''... I know it's harsh but I don't understand how someone need so much attention from so much people to be satisfied. But that's the way you are and I know that this is a judgment based on my ''view'' and morals.

    And please , let go of your boyfriend and next time says CLEARLY that you want an open relationship.

    It's not about monogamy vs. poly''amori'' as you say but most about being honest and respecting the other partner.

    It seems like I was born to be emotionally monogamous and that's OKAY and it seems like you are able to love more than one person at the time, which is ''okay'' too....

    But don't try to force that upon me or others as saying that it's normal and I won't force you to lead a monogamous life style if you
    can't... but you must know and recognize that it's a minority of people that live like this and that you will be judge many times trough your life for that but you don't have to be and make some else miserable either.

    You can live the way you want but you have to be able to deal with the ''consequences'' and to understand that this is not considered normal by ''society'' and that you will be judged , like I could be judge for having tattoos or something else.

    Here on this site people always brag about accepting the differences and all but we do not live in wonderland and if you chose an alternative path you will have to assume the social stigma that comes with it. I don't say that we should not try to change as a society but we can't make everyone happy.

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  • wastingmytime333

    I do the same exact thing. I'm never content with just one guy. I have this need to have more than one, like there isn't enough of something...I just can't put my finger in it....

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  • ginsters101

    its normal, it can be hot. my wife has (at least) two lovers, one I find un-attractive, the other is god-like and I have been privileged to watch them fuck. but the main point is that our own sex is much better after she has been with one of them - and its so normal that some say its the reason a guys cock is shaped the way it is (to scrape another mans sperm from her cunt).

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  • trustno177

    What a brat

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  • Can people who say it's not normal comment? I'm just curious as to what people think of the idea if they don't think it's normal. I don't want to be brutally criticized, I just want to understand where my feelings on the matter have gone astray.

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  • Me too!

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