My husband molest me while i sleep

You're not in the wrong, HE is. He is raping you and you continue to let it happen by going back to him. It would be okay if you gave him your consent but you haven't and he knows this. Yet, he continues to defile you like its not a problem when it is a huge one. The best thing you can do is divorce him and get custody of your child. Maybe, you could even file a report against him.

@GoraIntoDesiGals it doesn't matter if they are married or not. Rape is the forced unwanted act of sexual intercourse without consent. She didn't consent, so it is rape. But really what the real question should be is how do you sleep through being penetrated? Are you THAT LOOSEY GOOSEY?

No hes wrong. Well from what i hear in tv, a rapist likes it more And more when hes victim resist, crys, basically hate it. Its twisted yes. If this is what hes like, that dark pleasure will rule over any guilt. Pls have the strength to do what is necessary.

Sorry but if you're married then it isn't rape.

Did you talk about this with the therapist? There is a name for this .... It's called sexsomnia.. Most of the time the person doesn't even know they are doing it..

Me and my wife are going through the same thing. I have been doing that to her. I am definitely not proud of it. When I did it I didn't want to do it, it was kind of a subconscious thing. whether it was a lack of self control or what I don't know. Either way it was wrong. If you don't want him to do that then he shouldn't. I had done that to my wife on several occasions and felt terrible every time but kept doing it anyways. Me and my wife might be getting a divorce we are kind of in a limbo type situation. She is going to get counseling/ therapy and I'm going to get the same. I love my wife and would do anything for her but there is something wrong and I don't know why I keep doing that. So maybe your husband is in the same situation, or it's just his thing I don't know. Just because he does that doesn't make him a rapist. If I can't fix this then I'm going to divorce my wife because she doesn't deserve that kind of treatment, she deserves to be happy. Pose that question to him and see what he says. Best of luck to you.

leave. quit your bitching, get a back bone and leave. if your body is not responding, leave. take everything he has and leave. i would think that would make you a gold digger or a prostitute, but society deems it appropriate for a woman to financially rape a man when they divorce. you could justify it by saying he raped you first. of course, then it means you aren't any better.

To the original poster, I've sorry to hear that this has hurt what sounded like an otherwise good relationship. Clearly, the issue here seems to be a disagreement between your ideas of a healthy sex life, and his.

Just because you don't enjoy being woken up in that way doesn't mean there's anything unhealthy about his sexual desires or your aversion to being woken up in that way.

From a male's perspective, there are few things more arousing to me than being woken up in the middle of the night by my wife on top of me. I enjoy pleasuring my wife, and find that afterward, I wake up rested and cheerful.

You expressed that feel degraded by this behavior, would you feel bothered if he woke you in the middle of the night and asked for sex? Would you chastise him and tell him to roll over and go back to sleep? Can you imagine how frustrating that sort of rejection can be? Have you ever been kept up all night by sexual frustration after being refused satisfaction? Can you appreciate that special kind of humiliation and regret? The thought that "maybe I married the wrong person, maybe we're not sexually compatible. Is this what I have to look forward to the rest of my life?"

What would you prefer he do? Masturbate? Find himself a mistress? Some people simply have a strong sexual appetite. I do, and so might he. That doesn't make either of us a pervert or deviant, but it does limit our options for finding a satisfactory sexual partner. Try to keep an open mind. We all have fantasies, you do, I do and so does he. Give as good or better than you get and try to help satisfy each other.

Don't assume he thinks any less of you for it, but further, and don't blame yourself.

I ran across this post after experiencing a similar situation. I just wanted to add that it doesn't matter who this person is or what excuse he throws out (stress my butt!), he's a pervert and this is wrong. Once you have told someone "no" that is it. They need to back off and give you your personal space. The fact that he knows what he is doing and continues to do it without the consent of his wife, speaks volumes to his respect for her. She's not some blowup doll that is there for his sexual pleasure. She is a human being who, while attracted and in love with her husband, isn't always in the mood to pleasure him at his every whim. Saying she should welcome his unwanted advances because he's her husband is backwards thinking. Can't she be free to get a good night's rest without someone trying to sex her up? If she's in a deep sleep (whatever the reason is) she is unconscious and therefore cannot consent to sex, and in that aspect he is essentially raping her. Especially, if while awake, she has previously told him she doesn't want him to do that to her anymore. Men need to be taught that women are not there to cater to their every need. We should be respected, loved, protected. And no, I'm not an effing "feminist" I'm just a human being who thinks that a man should respect the women in his life. Afterall, without women, men wouldn't even be born.

You should molest his head with a lit Molotov cocktail. Should teach him.
"An eye for an eye, a Molotov cocktail for a Molotov cocktail."
-Russian proverb

Being married to him how does this hurt you it seems like you would instead you would enjoy him doing that to you.

I think this is rape simply because it makes you uncomfortable. If you didn't mind then it would be ok, but the fact that you dont like him doing that means that its not. You should divorce because you are not sexually compatable with each other. You need someone who respects your boundries and he needs somoene who likes sleep sex. He wont stop doing this it seems.

I do this to my girlfriend sometimes, when im falling asleep/almost asleep. it feels nice having her in my arms when im falling asleep and i must get turned on. she's my girlfriend see, so she'll either wake up and make me stop or else have sex with me, not accuse me of rape,because she's my girlfriend. i don't understand how this is rape unless he's actually forcing you or holding you down. and if you wake up and he's already inside you then 1. youre a very heavy sleeper and
2. you must be turned on if he's able to get inside alright.

i dont understand how a husband can molest his wife if they are in bed together.

I use to think that biking to and from work everyday made me fall asleep harder because I have always been a light sleeper. So I reecently asked my doctor about my blood tests from 2012 and if there were any traces of sleeping agents. He confirmed that an average sleeping medication was found in my blood for about three months, which was the same period of time when these "episodes" first began. I DONT TAKE SLEEPING PILLS! Imagine my shock! My doctor even looked worried. Thank you everyone for your advice.

If he was doing this to you like once in a blue moon, then I think it's harmless. But if he's doing this on a regular basis, then I think he definaltley has some serious problem that needs to be addressed with a professional immediately. This is a violation of your sexual being and as a human being altogether. If you love him enough, I would seek some professional advise asap. If not, leave him.

Hm, first let me say I do this to my wife all the time and she loves it. It shows I'm interested in her physically . We are in a sexless relationship due to her birthcontrol., last time we had sex was about 5 months ago. Now anyone who knows when there's no passion the love can die like the amber of a roaring flame. You should be great full that he'should not cheating on you and trying to get you to react to his in tension on being passionate with you since your not giving it up to him anyway. Feminist just keep your cocktais in check. Cause you more then likely don't have a man at all in your life this is rape that's rape. No when 4 men beat you down regardless you say no that's rape. A husband wanting his wife is not. Look it up no matter what belief or idea you have all say the same thing women ate to take care of their husbands don't like it don't get married get a divorce Yada yada.