My husband food shamed me last night

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17 Comments

So I was feeling snackish last night. I did not eat my dinner well, so I had a mini chocolate bar after dinner and then when I proceeded to eat a scone,he said to me, "babe If you eat after meals you're gonna blow up" I was so hurt. I told him comments like that are unacceptable and to never say that to me again.

He said that he didn't mean it in a bad way and he wasn't implying I'm fat or I'll gain weight but he is concerned about my "health". His mum often tells him that he is too fat and that he needs to diet, he has gained weight in the past few months and be feels bad about himself because he often calls himself a pig. I feel like he's projecting onto me. In one sitting he can eat two or three packs of ramen, basically pigs out and smokes
too but he tells me "I'll blow up" for reaching for a fucking scone. I'm always encouraging him and I to do home exercises and to take walks.

I am not fat, I always watch what I eat, like a human being,I have days when I'm hungrier than usual.

I have a history of an eating disorder. Anorexia and Bulimia for FOURTEEN YEARS.. FOURTEEN FUCKING YEARS and he knows that. Comments about food or my weight really trigger me and take me to a dark place, I've been to hell and back with the eating disorders. I am 171cm tall and 55kg.

He apologized as tried to explain where he was coming from but right now we're in quarantine and I can't even talk to him coz I'm still pissed off.

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Based on 8 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 17 )
  • SmokeEverything
    3 years ago

    That's not nice but youre throwing me off with this metric stuff

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  • uradumbfuck
    3 years ago

    sounds like you have a great open and honest relationship
    good luck, hope these internet comments fix everything

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  • howaminotmyself
    3 years ago

    Yeah, if he knows your past he should be conscious of trigger words. Sounds like it is probably an unconscious comment on his part too. But times are weird. We need to be forgiving of each other and ourselves. Just enjoy that scone with no shame.

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  • McSorley
    3 years ago

    Tell him to take a quick glance in a mirror before doling out this lifesaving advice to someone who clearly needs it way less than he does.

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  • SeashellSong
    3 years ago

    Have a serious conversation with him. This is not kind of him.

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  • raisinbran
    3 years ago

    Yeah, that wasn't nice. I would eat snacks privately, keep it hidden from him because he's still judging you.

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  • Mammal-lover
    3 years ago

    Men are assholes. But really who eats less than one packet of ramen? If in eating ramen it's at least 2 packs

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    • palehorse
      3 years ago

      This man is an asshole but that doesn't make all men assholes.

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      • Mammal-lover
        3 years ago

        No all men are assholes. They are so stupid. That doesnt mean I dont like men they just really piss me off sometimes

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        • palehorse
          3 years ago

          That's just called being sexist...

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          • Mammal-lover
            3 years ago

            I'm not sexist i just know men for what they are

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  • Inkmaster
    3 years ago

    Men don't always think before we speak.

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    • palehorse
      3 years ago

      That's not a gender problem, that's a you problem.

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      • Inkmaster
        3 years ago

        Dude, I'm saying that as a man. I don't hate men, I just recognize that there are some flaws more common in men than in women. Not thinking before we speak is one of them. There are flaws more common in women than in men, too. Women are more likely to be cattier than men, for example.

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        • palehorse
          3 years ago

          Source for any of that?

          There are two things wrong with your statement. One, that it's sexist, and two, that you're acting like it's an excuse when it really isn't.

          I'm a woman and I have issues with not thinking before I speak, among other things. But I don't blame my problems on my gender... I fix them. Like when people fairly criticize me, I don't say "Too bad, I'm a girl so that's just how I am." Your gender isn't an excuse for your personality flaws. This is some "boys will be boys" shit.

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          • Inkmaster
            3 years ago

            "Source for any of that?" I don't have a source, I just have life experience. Maybe it's not something that's more common in men. I don't really care. It's not the main point of what I was trying to say. "acting like it's an excuse when it really isn't" No, I'm not. I'm saying that it's a possible reason, not an excuse. He most likely didn't mean anything by it and just spoke without thinking. That's all that I was saying.

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            • Clunk42
              3 years ago

              Your life experience is wrong and you should be ashamed. (Only half that sentence is correct)

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