My daughter is having sex with my boyfriend
When I was in my late 30s I split from my abusive husband and left with my young children, soon after I met a younger man and we began a relationship, as my children grew I noticed my daughter had a little crush on him witch we laughed about at the beginning but as she got older the flirtatious behaviour got more sexual and more noticeable. Friends and family would ask me if I was worried about the way she dressed around him and if I thought that there was a risk of something happening as she got older, I would speak to her about the way she dressed and her behaviour, she will just roll her eyes at me and say oh my god mum you are so jealous. When she was around 18 I started to notice other things that made me become suspicious that something was going on. I would find her underwear between my sheets in my bed. If I asked him he would say "how would I know" and she would just yell what are you accusing me of now, I just got changed in your room, or they must of fallen out of the washing. If I arrived home and they didn't see me I would notice them laughing and joking together but then when they would see me they would act as though they didn't even see each other they dont make Eye contact or speak to each other in front of me. This behaviour made me even more suspicious. I started seeing alot of calls from her on boyfriends phone, many of them after midnight. Then I had a friend Who visited my house while I wasn't home and said she heard giggling from the bedroom so she called out before she walked in and noticed my daughter duck out the side door in a towel, then when she walked into the bedroom expecting to find me, instead she found my boyfriend in bed naked with just a sheet over him. She had also noticed underwear on the floor beside the bed.
Ever since this day I have watched them. kept an eye on phone bills and bank statements. I have even set up a camera in my room when I have been working at nights and have found him having sex with someone who looks exactly like my daughter but unfortunately she looks just like me in the dark also so he denied it and said it was me.
But I know I set the camera up when I left for work and it was flat when I got home the next morning I know it was not me but how can I prove it. I have more than enough evidence but neither one of them will admit that there is anything happening and have convinced my other children that I am going crazy.
I am so depressed lately that I have thought about ending it!! But I can't let the betrayal of one child leave my another children without a mother.
I feel as though I have had every ounce of dignity and self confidence stripped from me I feel dead inside my spirit has been squashed and I don't know if I can ever smile again
I have always put my children's needs first and feel so bad that I even suspect my daughter of doing such an unspeakable thing to me.
I don't know why but I need them to confess to me. But it is important to me that they explain how this started and how they justify continuing it right under my roof rather than him ending our relationship and moving on. Getting the truth will give me closure and help me to find a way to survive and move foreword. because right now I am not coping, I spend most days sleeping so that I don't have to think about what is happening right under my nose and I have become a bad mother to my youngest children who still need me because I can't function properly under the pain and the hurt that I am feeling. I have become so disgusted in myself that I can't look in the mirror any more believing that he has chosen the younger better version of me making me worthless. When I met him I was a bubbly, confident, strong and successful business woman and now I am a broken very depressed version of my former self. I feel sad for my youngest children because the daughter who is at the centre of all this was raised by a happy, supportive and very involved mum and they deserve to have that same experience but right now I find it hard enough just to pretend to smile.
| How can I get them to tell me the truth so I can get closure | 19 | |
| How can I rebuild my relationship with her | 12 | |
| Do I tell her boyfriend | 25 |