My cousin who is 20 says i'm stupid for thinking of getting pregnant at 35?

Not normal, and she has no say in your choice. Also, she is 20 for crying out loud! She is barely even an adult and has very little life experience, so who is she to judge what you do and whether or not your friends are "weird" for making a different choice than her parents? Pretty typical for naive 20-year-olds to think they know everything, though (I also thought I knew way more than I really did at that age, lol). I personally think it's smart of you to want to have a stable and serious relationship first, as well as to be financially stable. I wish more parents would think about that, because their kids' lives would be so much better for it.

My parents also had me in their 30's when they had been together a long time and were financially stable, and I think it made for a better and more stable childhood for me, plus they were more mature, had more life experience, and therefore were able to set a better example for me and teach me more.

There is no "correct" age for a woman to get pregnant. The "correct" age is when she damn well feels like it, and nobody should be telling her what she can and can't do in her life.

Go live your life as you damn well want and forget what your cousin thinks!

Your cousin is unhealthily obsessed with your business. It's absolutely nothing to do with her.

35 is certainly older, from a biological standpoint, but these days it is a fairly common age to start trying. I had my last baby after the age of 35. Certainly harder, but not impossible. If you haven't been through menopause yet then you still have a horse in the race. Just be prepared to hear yourself referred to as "geriatric" when you have your ultrasounds. That's what we all get called when pregnant after 35, in medical terms.

Why does she care so much? Do you think she is jealous of you? You say she plans to have kids at 25... So she doesn't have any kids yet....

Your cousin is ignorant.

Both of you are correct. Some people are infertile by 35. I don't think most people are, but some are. You might change your mind as you get older, and she might change her mind as she gets older. Most people, from my knowledge, who have children, have their first child before 40. You should have children when you find the time is right.

Your kids are more likely to hate you for having them when you were young, since you'd have much more financial problems and so wouldn't be able to afford to give them a decent upbringing. You'd also have less life experience to use in raising them.

It's when you're a woman in your 40's when you have more of a chance of your children being born disabled. Not 30's.

Your cousin sounds like a moron!

Your cousin is fucking retarded.

She's a dumbass. Having kids young almost never works out well (at least not here), the parents almost always go broke a few months to a year in & dump the cunt monkey off on their parents when it all go's to shit because they couldn't wait to be financially stable (fully paid off car/house & dependable job) before having kids.

35 seems like a great time to have a child. I think too many people think of having children as if they're like having pets. You're raising an entire human being for many years. 35 is generally a much more stable period of your life, therefore better for you and the kid. <3

My mom had me at 39 and it's been fine. The only issue is that she has chronic health problems, but if she didn't, I'm sure it'd be even better.

I'm 52. I had my kids at 31 and 32. It was the perfect age for me, but I would have had kids up until I was about 37 or 38 if we wanted more. I would have been too young and too immature at 25.

I have a few mom friends my age or older and a group of friends that are about 4 years younger. My kids are in college now, I never fully stopped working but I hit my career hard when they were in late high school and opened a couple e-commerce businesses as well.

My dad was 54 when I was born and my Mom was 34 which was unheard of in the 60's. But my Mom's Mom was 40 when she was born in the early 30's. All healthy. All good.

This is such a personal decision, do what you want to do.

Sounds like your friend can't see past herself and her experiences

She grew up with young parents, she wants kids young, it's also an excuse for her to have sex and she doesn't need to rush for plan B or anything. All she can see are generations of people close together and being liberated sexually

I'm guessing you see it as bringing life into this world and being able to provide a really high quality of life with which to rear your child

My step dad was like 45 years older than me and it was good when I was like 10 and he was early 50s, but through high school he just became a huge dick, too much to go into here. Your friend may have seen this in others and wants to save you. Also, some women do lose eggs in their 30s. I'm pretty sure you can test your fertility

40s is not normal. There's a 50% chance you won't even be able to get naturally pregnant once you hit 40, and a 5/10% chance once you hit 45.

First world countries are fucked because people are having very few kids, and they're only starting when their biological clock is nearly dead.

It's really sad. You're reasoning makes sense, and a lot of women who are clever leave it really late, and even then they have none 1 or 2 kids. But essentially, since we've created contraception, people with good genes are failing the evolutionary race in alarming numbers, and those who are too stupid to use protection or don't plan their future are the ones who breed young and a lot, and thus will be the people of tomorrow.

Your thinking is normal. To be honest, you're thinking, the thinking a lot of people have on this matter, is devastating to humanity and won't be around for long, because it goes completely against the natural progress of evolution. It's tragic what modern society wants us to prioritize. IQ in the west has been falling for decades now. We're literally devolving, and we'll continue to.

Just look at the replies you've got to this. No one even sees a problem that's as plain as day. You have the right to do whatever you want in this regard, but on a large scale, people are choosing to do what you're doing and it's causing real problems.

You're cousin's wrong for harassing you about it though. She should explain the reasons why she thinks it logically and then let you choose.

Something I notice that a lot of people are saying on here is the equivalent of saying, "People in their twenties are financially unstable." That is not the case. For example, my parents had their first child in their twenties, and they were perfectly financially stable. All it takes is a good job, which someone in their twenties can have. If you (or the person you marry) has a job that can pay for a family, then you are not too financially unstable to have a child. The idea of "wait for financially stability" is stupid if you are already financially stable.