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me and my boyfriend have been going out for ages and although we've kissed and stuff we're not overly physical but i really want to sleep with him and i trust him comletely as we've been going out for so long, however i dont think he want to sleep with me because he's really shy and he hardly ever does anything sexual with me is this normal?
Depends on your age.... If youre 15 not a good idea, if you're 19 I don't see why not.
As has been said many times: Communication is key. Youv been in a relationship for long you say. Relationships are in themselves pretty pointless without sexual activity...you might as well be friends, because friends love each other. So anyway, Next time your in bed, ask him, straight up. Something like 'we'v been in a relationship now for x-period of months and i completely trust you. Would you feel comfortable trying sex?'
Im no expert but if he likes/loves you, you cant do any harm. It could achieve 1 of 2 things. 1: you do it. 2: you find out something thats been holding him back and you either solve it or you rethink your relationship. Either way, you would be totally and completely normal in wanting sex he can hardly get angry with you? If he does, think about it this way, y is he even in a relationship with you?
For example, I first had sex with my partner when she straight up asked me 'do you wanna have sex?'. A ballsy move, but boy am i glad she asked!
Ask, you wont regret it. You dont wanna be in a relationship forever thinking whether he wants it or not, you deserve to know, especially if it at least puts your mind at ease!
GOOD LUCK
I'm going to go with most everybody else on this one...you're going to have to talk to him. There are so many things that affect how a person feels about a situation so the best thing to do is just ask him. Good luck and I hope you get laid ;)
Maybe he likes you so much that he doesnt want to make a wrong move. So maybe its up to you to make some moves?
Jessicia16, why would you say that? The OP should be proud that her boyfriend respects her this much to wait for her to make the sexual move. He is a man, and men want and love sex 24/7. Trust me, if you talk to him about it or make a move, I'm sure the truth will come out and he is probably being overly cautious, which is a good thing. It means he respects you as a person. Good luck.
its not normal .. he sounds like a little boy, id suggest getting with an older guy who has a brain and a spine ... dont waste your time playing little boy's games.
how about you talk to him about it instead of speculating on an online forum. That usually is a good way of finding out peoples feelings.
His age and sense of experience and confidence in himself in a sexual situation may be a factor. Some men have been scolded or teased for being too sexual with their partners too early, and he may be simply trying not to rush you. Has he had any bad sexual experiences in the past? Maybe a girl he was with got pregnant, or worse, had an STD/STI? You know, it's possible that he is simply more traditional and trying to save that special moment with you for a wedding night? You see what we are doing here is jumping all over the place using assumptions in the place of facts. Facts we don't have. In any case, you'll never know if you don't ask him. Point blank, ask him if he has fantasized about making love to you. If you prefer however, you may want to seduce him into your bed (if he won't take you into his). Try planning a romantic evening with a home-cooked meal, some wine and relaxing music, maybe take a nice long bath together...anything to get him feeling relaxed and comfortable with you.
best of luck
Is he a Christian? Maybe he wants to wait for marriage to have sex. Or maybe he is a virgin or is just insecure about his sexual prowess and fears being a flop in bed. If you think he is someone that you could see yourself marrying some day...talk with him and set his mind at ease that you only want to express how much you love him. But keep in mind that having sex before marriage is statistically detrimental to a healthy marriage. While its true that 50%% of all marriages fail, the marriages of people who have engaged in pre-marital sex had a failure rate of close to 75%%. People who saved themselves for marriage had a higher-than-average marital success rate (70-75%%). Probably because by waiting they showed that they A. Valued their mate enough to wait for it, and B. Illustrated that they were capable of "sacrificing self" for the good of their marriage. Its an old-fashioned and unpopular stance, but truth is still truth.