My bf's mom...

Reminiscent here...

Alright this is just getting on my nerves. My bf mom is so irritating with every breath she takes. But for like the past 7-8 months she started a new irritation.

Everytime she tries something or i do something she complemets me in the worst way possible. ..its not really a complement.

Example 1:(happened today)
she tried to cook the cake bowls like you set cupcake pan on top of another cupcake pan that has your batter and it makes a bowl you can put a scoop of ice cream in...anyway she failed. As she was baking them anytime I went in the kitchen she would tell me that if I had done it how perfect they would have come out...later after it was a clear failure I told her that it was her first time trying and that I bet no one gets it on the first try... "I bet you could" was her response.

Example 2: I learned how to crochet off a few youtube videos while my daughter was at school... she informed me she had tried it in the past but could never do it.
to this day months later I still hear about how great I am because I learned it in a day... same thing happens with knitting.

These are not complements and have a condescending jealousy feel to it... I wish she would stop.
At first I thought she might like to learn so I tried teaching her how too cook and knit...but she gave up soon and would not practice with me.

Question is do you know someone who acts like this? Do you act like this? And any advice ? Do you have problems with your partners parents? (I bet I have worse stories lol)

I know someone like this... 8
I am like this... 0
I also wonder why she does this... 6
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 15 )
  • handsignals

    Oh great post OP! Bravo, I wish I was as good at posting as you.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • reminiscent

      *le sigh*

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • Toball

        Ignore handsignals they're just trying to get under your skin.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
  • I don't see what is odd about this. It sounds like she is trying to be encouraging and lacks confidence.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • reminiscent

      Its not coming off that way. Its the tone she says it in...I have had complements before...I do not mind them.
      but the fact that she goes on referencing past events constently and the way she says it...i half expect to see an eye roll or something.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • flailyhailey

    Jealousy is very common. Maybe try talking to your partner about their mother's behaviour and see how they feel. Maybe it would be best if they spoke to her themself.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • reminiscent

      Normally this woukd be very nice advice
      however he already knows...I think anyone talking to her about it directly would make her behavior worse...you kinda have to try to indirectly say things... so she doesnt feel like the problem.
      this is difficult with some things.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • slings_and_arrows

    "but she gave up soon and would not practice with me."
    That made me laugh, she sounds like a 5 year old...
    Maybe she is threatened by not being number 1 in her sons life anymore? One of those oedipal things?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • reminiscent

      Maybe...but really she never was #1
      he never liked her because of her personality

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Aliceee93

    Staceys mom has got it going on, staceys mom has got it going on, shes all ive wanted and ive waited for so long!
    Stacey cant you see your just not the girl for me..
    I know it might be wrong but im in love with staceys mom

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • I like this song but it has nothing to do with the topic. Other then the fact that its about a mom.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Toball

    Hmm...I don't think I've heard of (let alone met) anyone who does this kinda thing. I wish I could be a lttle more helpful... could you give a few more examples?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • reminiscent

      I made pretzels look like little chickens with white chocolate I dyed yellow for Easter... she kept telling me how she could never do something like that...how talented I was. I heard this for like a month.

      She made a table out of wood...while she was making it she would tell me how I could do better...I informed her that I dont know how to work with wood...she told me "I bet you could learn it in a day like with your scarves."

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • Toball

        Ok that's not normal. Either she has some serious issues or she's being massively passive aggressive. How to handle this...if she's been like this for years then your bf might not even realise she does it and might defend her if you brought it up. If she is being passive aggressive she'll doughtfully just ease up if you ask her to but that approach; if worded correctly; could work if you do it within earshot of your bf. You could say some like, "Could you ease up on the compliments? I just don't like getting so many." Something like that if you used a little finese and personal touch and maybe make it sound nicer (if it sounds rude Idk feeling tired). I wish you luck in dealing with your bf's mom.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • reminiscent

          He notices and it irritates him too.
          I could do that next time she throws a complement my waym..it sounds like the best way to word it so she wont over react

          Comment Hidden ( show )