My best friend shares her bed with her dad

my best friend is a 28 year old woman whose parents are lazy and dysfunctional, they had brought her up until 17 yrs old in an very verbally abusive household until she gained emancipation. Immediately she got hooked up with a very abusive and neglectful man who got her pregnant by 20 and again 23, and of course abandoned her completely. On her own she began to straighten out, found a job, got an apartment, raise her children with little help from m&d and go to college. In the meantime her parents lost everything and eventually moved in with her supposedly temporarily. Two years later they are still there.Now all five live in a two bedroom apartment.The parents pay nothing towards financial assistance and claim that their babysitting is sufficient help. Dad collects SSI and claims brain injury from a very old accident. He is now 70 years old. My problem is I recently found out that while Mom is away at church (she is a religious fanatic) or staying at a younger daughters house (which happens more often then less these days),my bfriend is sharing her bed with her Dad.She works nights, sleeps during the day when not in school He is always claiming to be sick and lays around most of the day and stays up at night and literally does nothing. He won't even clean up for himself.When my bfriend is trying to sleep her dad almost always comes in and shares her bed, instead of using the kids room.She says nothing is going on. My Bfriend does not know how to tell him to get out, and plays it down, as feeling guilty because he is not feeling well. I see this as a sort of emotional incest abuse by her father, who used to objectify her with some very inappropriate comments, to others because of her beauty when she was younger.Something is just not right with this picture or is it normal, or am I overreacting?

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22% Normal
Based on 138 votes (30 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • lalcina

    why would you get emancipated and then let your parents move in afterwards?

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  • Mando

    Everything is not right. It keeps him out of the kids room but really, it is time for them to move out. Period. Does she not want to get away from the squalor and create a better home/life for her children?

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    • minab

      My sentiments exactly. I have been pointing out her enabling behavior and she admits it but that is where it ends. I see a pattern of her excuse making which in reality is the only tools she got as a child. Here is a brilliant woman but emotionally crippled. Her parents will never admit that there is a problem and she seems helpless to move on. I see the father as the real culprit, by playing up his disability which is long gone, and manipulating for sympathy. His family history reflects that he did this with his mother, wife (who also still makes excuses for him) and now his daughter my bgfriend. But what I seek is an experienced opinion that this bed sharing is definitely a form or not of emotional abuse. With this perhaps I can help my friend find the courage to defend herself

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      • Mando

        The facts speak for themselves. Help her find those parasites another place to live. There is no room in that apartment for anyone other than the mother and her two children and barely that. Anything else is bullshit - which is what you are detecting big time.

        She is fortunate to have a good friend to give her reality checks.

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  • Mersaphe

    Well he is 70 years old. I'm sure he can't even get it up anymore or struggles to do it

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  • Bass

    it's entirely her business and clearly her decision to do it.

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  • stinky55

    It's not normal. Of course he is using her. Men at 70 can still get it up. I beleive he is using his daughter sexually. If I were her. I would have him stay at a place that caters to his lifestyle. It's just a phone call away. The local police department. They will feed him. House him and even take care of all his medical Bills too. Then she needs to seek out a therapist. She needs to know it's not her fault. And there are decent men out there in this world that will treat her right.

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  • teendicksuckers

    Me and my sisters sleep with my Mommy and Step Daddy

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  • minab

    Sorry for the confusion. Of course I shortened the word "best" to "b" after I first used it, simply to keep it short because my explanation was so long winded.

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  • Terence_the_viking

    Your post is really confusing putting a b before friend totally threw me and i had to read it twice before it made any sense. It's not normal at all

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  • It's odd.

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