Mother forced me into corner about kid

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8 Comments

I didnt know i was going to have a kid, honestly. But as soon as i found out it was too late to do anything. I talked to her father and we agreed it was in her best intrest to be put up for adoption. We are both full time college students with no job, and im suffering from bouts of heavy depression. So, my mom found out a little later on and she was livid that i had sex, didnt tell her earlier, and lied. My depo vera shot wore before i knew it and me and him broke up soon after so i didnt worry about it.she dosent belive me though she then goes on this day long rant about it asking me what i was thinking about doing and i quote "ill be damned if my grandbaby ends up part of the system" i asked for time to make up my mind and for her not to tell anyone untill i did make a decision. My mind was allready made up, im a failure at life right now i wouldnt be good to her

She told my aunt M and forced me to tell my other aunt 5days later and then somebody from church i found out she did when she slipped up and said so. I was livid because it forced my hand to go her way in the matter even though i knew it would make me misrable. Love is a weapon for real

So i spend the next few weeks smiling and acting happy about things for every one hospital visits ect ect then shes born and every one is happy about it (or at least more happy than me).

I tried to explain that i felt traped into the position im in because of her overdominering ways and the fact that she knew i wouldnt do what i wanted to inorder to spare 99.999% of my family and le tme say this i do not abuse her at all she is well taken care for by me and with some family help

Is it normal to feel that way based on all this ? Im trying to be happy but i cant even fake it anymore

Voting Results
70% Normal
Based on 60 votes (42 yes)
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Comments ( 8 )
  • DannyKanes
    12 years ago

    Many will argue that it's your baby, it's your responsibility. I argue that, it's your life and you should do whatever makes you happy. But I must stress, if you do give your baby up for adoption, what kind of impact would it have on your life? Most mothers, I know, long to have their children back, after they have given them up for adoption. Think about it :)

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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
    12 years ago

    don't you love when church is used for idle gossip?

    As for backing you into a corner I personally recommend trying to get a job and moving out to support yourself.

    as for your mother's desires... talk to your adoption agency about having contact with the family. many agencies do make allowances for that, and some even allow the mother to decide who gets the child. So you can also have an arrangement with them for contact etc.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    plenty of happy adoptions take place, i like the advice about agency help with famil y, you could also tell mother that she will have to raise the child, so its her choice , full stop. when is the baby due?

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  • Dozis
    12 years ago

    I do not understand. Could you translate this into a language I can understand?

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  • answerme
    8 years ago

    I think depression is just a mind thing. My mom died from a heart attack when my dad killed himself and I saw him dead. That was when I was 16. I was sad but not depressed. That's cause I think depression is just bullsit and fake.(I'm gonna get lots of hate aren't I)

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  • Xena
    11 years ago

    Frankly no it's not normal and it's selfish.

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  • Xena
    11 years ago

    Get child support and stop being a horrible mother.. Do you have any idea what many people would give to have a baby? Would you have liked your mother to feel the same way about you? If you really don't want to take care of your child give it to your mother who so desperately wanted you to have it till your done with college. BTW I am adopted and it was horrible... I grew up abused... Beaten, sexually molested and raped. My adopted family thought it was ok to do sexual things to 5-15 year olds because we weren't blood related. My adopted mother told me she hated me almost every day and even tried to give me back to the adoption agency when I was 10. Not all adoption is happy. The only way you can be sure your child is safe is if YOU raise it.

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    • maihou
      11 years ago

      What happens if she becomes unstable? Even kids with their blood parents can get abused.

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