Lost my libido at the age of 18

49% Normal
11 Comments

So, I'm currently 20 and I have basically no libido. I haven't for almost 2 years now. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend (now my fiance)at the age of 17, and when we first started doing it, I wanted to have sex all the time. But then I went away to college and we had a long distance relationship. I still got horny quite frequently for awhile, but then it suddenly stopped for some reason. I know it's not that I've gotten bored of my boyfriend, because I haven't been able to feel horny for anybody. I don't know why this happened, but it's really hard for me, and it's been making me feel depressed. My doctor tested my thyroid to see if it was a hormonal thing, but the results came back normal. Has this happened to anyone else? I don't know what to do, but I'm so sick of feeling this way. Life just isn't as good without it, and I feel sorry for my fiance having to be with a partner who's not enthusiastic about sex ever. Help?

Voting Results
49% Normal
Based on 71 votes (35 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • FlowerOfHope
    14 years ago

    Hmm, I also experience times when I have alow libido, but two years is actually quite long... Maybe your enthousiasm went away while you were in college? I don't know... I hope this doesn't last for too long anymore!

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  • astoria
    14 years ago

    maybe your just bored with "everyday" sex. try experimenting...it could work.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      13 years ago

      I've tried things besides just plain "everyday" sex. None of it gets me horny. Sex even feels different than it used to. Like, I used to love foreplay a lot, but now when my fiance does foreplay the exact same way he used to, I don't even like the way it feels.

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  • Destro7000
    14 years ago

    I think it may be an illness or the effect of a drug.

    If you WANT to feel that way and are questioning why you DON'T, I think it's pretty self-explanitory that this is some physical thing that needs to get fixed.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      14 years ago

      The only drug I've been taking is the birth control pill, but I've been on that for awhile and it wasn't a problem at first. My doctor said he could find no physical explaination for it, but it might be a psychological problem. I hate it, it takes a lot of the sparkle out of everyday life.

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  • rfc6486
    14 years ago

    Do yourself and boyfriend a favor and don't get married until you are able to get that urge back. Marriage without steady sex is a diaster waiting to happen. I know I have been married for 3 years now and my wife decided that 2 times a week is crazy. All the serious talks in the world has not helped so I have found a partner outside of the marriage in the same boat.

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  • MeMeMegaME
    14 years ago

    I'm sometimes like that, try new ways of spicing things up, something new. i recommend karma sutra, its a very good way of experincing new ways of having sex. hope this helps.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      14 years ago

      I'm afraid you don't understand. I haven't lost interest in sex because it's boring, I simply can't seem to get horny. Despite this, I still try to keep things interesting for my fiance, so I've done several things to "spice things up", such as roleplaying, new positions and sex in a semi public place. None of it got me going the way plain old vanilla sex did a few years ago.

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  • funkman
    14 years ago

    I was like that for years.

    It wasnt until i started looking into alternative therapies that things started to change (particularly Tai Chi, developing my energy, unblocking the "channels").

    Western medicine only gets half the picture. These sorts of things can happen if a channel
    or chakra gets blocked, or certain energies are low. I know all this stuff is so hippy cliche, I was pretty skeptical at first but its true.

    Look into finding a really good tai chi master, or consult a chinese herbalist, you might be suprised how they can help.

    Or then again, maybe you like girls..?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      14 years ago

      Ha ha, no. I have thought about whether I might be attracted to girls in the past, I do find them attractive and nice to look at, but they just don't ignite that 'spark' in me. Plus they're so much harder to get along with!

      Thanks for the comment about Tai Chi, though. I will look into it. See what it's about.

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  • hotchickie81
    14 years ago

    I'm like that, but I'm also on anti-depressants, so I blame it on that. I hope your problem goes away!

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