Lap dog in secret

I am addicted to getting lap dances from thick-legged black girls. This started about four years ago. I have to sneak to some inner city strip club to do it. Usually on Saturday afternoons when my wife goes out shopping. I live in central Jersey, so it's usually a drive down to Trenton or a little further drive to Camden. You guys in Trenton know the one I'm talking about, near the Trenton Makes Bridge. As far as Camden goes, two words: Admiral Wilson. Is this normal behavior for a fat ugly white motherfucker like me? Gets me all lathered up, I'll say that. For me it's just good clean fun. I don't cheat on my wife with hookers. And I tell no one I know that I do this. But do you think It's normal?