It's been 2 months since the breakup and i'm still crying over my ex?

How on earth do I just forget about him and move on?! I don't know what to do!

it's important to note that:
A. I really don't want to try dating again for a while so "finding someone else" isn't much of an option
B. There's no chance of us getting back together because we HATE each other; it ended very badly and I now live very far away from him. So no reconciliation. Number blocked on my phone and all.

I just keep having flashbacks of everything that happened, good and bad, during our year-long relationship, and even though I don't love him anymore (if that's what it was) it still drives me nuts and makes me extremely depressed. I can't go more than 5 minutes without being reminded of him, our old relationship and the things of the past. How do I just forget about him and move on without "finding someone else"? Or at least just keep my mind off him? I need to get on with my life and I want to stay single for now. ...Can you be single and happy? Does that even work?

Voting Results
82% Normal
Based on 62 votes (51 yes)
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Comments ( 10 )
  • Jeaneathean

    Two months is next to no time at all. Your feelings are entirely normal.

    Get yourself back 'out there' and start doing stuff without him in your mind.

    It's all part of developing, and you will be fine, and soon, I promise you.

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  • (s)aint

    I have also been single for two months. I'm doing really fine now (Which is partlybecause of the fact that I accidental y fell for another guy way too soon for my own preferences, but hey it happened and we are on the same page)

    Anyway first of all: Remove ALL your triggers, things that remind you of him. If its things that you don't want to throw away-hide it.
    Second, understand how and why it ended and also tell yourself about ALL his bad qualities and why you were bad for another.

    And the company of good friends/things that occupy your mind is great too.

    This is what I have done to get over my break-up and I got dumped on FACEBOOK at 2 am in the night AND we were planning to move in together and he left me without a reason ( I got the reason three weeks later)

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  • Loneliness

    I feel the same way.. We broke up three years ago and I still can't get over him.. The truth is that the whole "getting over someone" is just a lie.. We can pretend that we moved on but the pain is always there.

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    • ShallNotBeNamed

      What sucks the most is that he's perfectly fine and doesn't care at all

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      • Loneliness

        :'(

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  • LadyOfDecay♡

    I suggest you keep yourself occupied 24/7 if you can. Don't stay home alone, have friends come over or go stay over at their place. Go out, make new friends. Go shopping for new clothes and give yourself a make over if you must. Pick up a new hobbie, or get a pet dog.

    Anything to keep your mind off of the way you're feeling. Believe me, it works. You need to keep your mind occupied and everytime you start feeling those feelings of hopelessness, you go and do something fun and interesting. I know it sounds silly, but it really does work. Pass the time as best you can, because time really does heal you after a while.

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  • dustㅤ

    You're expecting too much of yourself. It's going to hurt for a lot longer than two months. Sometimes breakups take years to get over.

    Focus on yourself for a while and doing things that bring you happiness and comfort. Dedicate some of your time to making other people's lives brighter, like through volunteering.

    Don't start dating until most of the pain has subsided. It's not fair for the guys you're dating because you'll not be in a place where you're able to move on properly yet. Dating too early can also make you feel worse because it's a reminder that you're not with the one you love.

    Don't rush your healing.

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  • thegypsysailor

    Absolutely the only way to move on in any reasonable amount of time is to start dating again. Otherwise you are just going to sink deeper and deeper into your misery.
    When I say dating, I mean just that. You should just be going out and having a good time, NOT be trying to replace your ex. Don't get serious or attached to anyone; keep your emotional distance, for a while.
    The only person you are hurting is yourself, by sitting at home alone and unhappy. Your ex, from the sound of things, would be very happy to hear how miserable you are.

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  • LadyOfDecay♡

    First of all, I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. I've been with my boyfriend for a year now, and I cannot even imagine life without him.

    That being said, there really is no absolutely accurate way to get over anybody. The stronger your feelings for the person were, the harder it gets to forget them. Truth it, you're going to have to grin and bare it.

    I know its hard, I know how horrible it feels, I know it feels like nothing in the world even feels like it has meaning anymore but believe me, life goes on. May I ask your age? I know that this might be a cliche thing to say, but if you're young, you really do have your whole life ahead of you to take your time, and when you're ready, you will find someone else.

    You shouldn't go looking for a guy just to replace the hole in your heart the last one left, because that just results in more people getting hurt so you have your head in the right place as far as waiting a while before dating goes.

    I wish you luck and hope you forget about him soon. Trust me, time will allow memories to fade. You won't feel horrible forever. Hang in there!

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    • ShallNotBeNamed

      I am still young, but that probably makes it worse if it causes me to be more emotional..

      Do you have any suggestions on what I could do to help myself forget or recover?

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