Isit it normal to keep pesting my boyfriend or leave him alone?

uhm....well here goes, my bf and I have been together forever, I care for him very much and I love him,alot. 4-5 years.(im 18-he, 19) and well I had been abused as a child, but only molested, it never went anywhere else on from that point.(I grieved and sought help, even to this day i get my flashbacks, my anger, my 'I dont want to be in the dark' and alot of crying) he however, was raped on more than one occasion and he was just a child. he never deserved any of it. And when i told him about my situation he was so caring, and sweet, and wel...a real gentleman. he always said he wont push or force me into anything i dont want to do. but when he told me what happened to him, i got so angry, and i wanted to smash the people's head in who did it, and his family, they are the most monstrous people alive.
and anyways, something happened, an argument between him and I, and it was epic, bad. and he started to cry and didn't even argue with me back after a while. later on, he explained that i brought him back to that place he once was a child. when he felt he was being violated, trapped and having an outer body experience. Now call me stupid, but isn't that like a relapse, a flash back as one may call it, or a trigger?
and i said to him, we need to get u help, what if someone, other than me, who doesn't know about this, treads on your feet, then what? r u going to cry in the corning of the room without an explanation? and he just tells me to drop the f*in subject, talk about something else. i said to him, i'll support, u always, because I love u, but u need to see a counselor or something. for the sake of ur health and the relationship. Lately, after his 'episode' when he touches me or tries to be intimate, i thought of the sadness of what happened to him. and its no good,I'm not in the mood anymore. I can't deal with the fact of what happened, especially since he;s such a loving, loyal and amazing partner. but them im wondering....could there be something wrong with me?(I mean I caused that trigger-and I don't want it happening again) im glad he told me, it shows theirs trusts,and it lessens the burden on him, but he wont ever talk about it. and i need to hear him say something on the issue, like that smell brought back a foul memory...or you know something, something human! right now, he wont talk to me, he says i keep pushing an issue he doesn't need to remember at all.
And that's what he does, he represses everything, shoves it under the carpet, and never looks back. I mean what should I do? anyone has any experience such as this, right now i've left him to his thoughts, until he;s ready to speak to me again, but right now...i just need some advice. Desperately, I know im doing something wrong