Is wearing make up misleading?

17 Comments

My skin isn't perfect, but it's getting better as I age. I have really sensitive skin prone to allergic breakouts, occasional pimples, eczema, you name it. I wear concealer to cover up the post-marks. I don't wear eye shadow, I love lip gloss, I wear some mascara sometimes as well.

I began talking to this guy who is physically flawless. I'm sure he's drawn to me because I appear to be as well. Things are getting serious between us, I can honestly say I'm in love with him. We haven't gone all the way yet, but when we do I'm worried that the make up that covers my blemishes will smudge and his reaction will be negative. He's never been in love before, but he said he's falling for me. My original plan was to make him fall in love and then reveal myself to him without make up. Because once you're in love, looks are only an added bonus. My blemishes aren't God awful, but I'd never go past my mailbox without make up with my face the way it is.

I hope I don't sound shallow. Do you guys think it's misleading? Please comment. Thank you.

Yes 38
No 57
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Comments ( 17 )
  • Anonymous Post Author
    10 years ago

    Update everyone: He saw me without make up today, and he still thinks I'm beautiful :).

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    • RoseIsabella
      2 years ago

      Proper application of cosmetics can certainly improve ones looks, and self-confidence, but make can't turn an ugly step-sister into Cinderella!

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  • kittykat9930
    10 years ago

    You don't sound shallow, you just sound really insecure. But I'm that way too, especially around my partner. But if you're blemishes aren't as bad as you think they are then your boyfriend shouldn't have a single problem with your natural looks and if he's really falling for you then he should like you the way you are! But if you're really worried, you could always go every day uncovering one blemish at a time to see how he reacts maybe?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      I appreciate your comment.

      Yes, very insecure in deed..well, at times. I'm thinking of just sitting him down and just saying it. He knows I have sensitive skin, and when I have a break out, he can see the hives or the elevation on my skin. But when the swelling goes down, I'm usually left with a mark, and he hasn't seem them. I mean, he must know they exist right? Ahhhh this is driving me nuts. I think uncovering them one at a time would be bizarre in my case.

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  • worriedgirlhere
    10 years ago

    Girl, I can see where you're coming from.
    I have post marks as well, and I cover them up pretty well with makeup.
    I don't have the courage to go out in public without makeup.
    I used to have really bad acne (I used a prescription topical treatment) and now my skin is really okay now. Just my post marks are there and some occasional breakouts.

    No one should expect you to be flawless. And if they do, they're not worth your time.

    See, when you have acne, you can see who the real people are in your life. I noticed certain people who I thought were my friends treated me differently because I had bad acne. The people who still treated me the same or cared for me were my family, some close friends, some teachers, etc. The ones that treated me differently were all in those same categories, just different people.

    What I'm trying to get at is, if he really cares about you, he won't make a fuss about something like bad skin.

    In a way, you have to also switch roles like ItDuz put it. Would you be okay if he was wearing makeup and then you realize that he had underlying problems he was hiding? If you think about it, you might be sort of off-putted. But if you really care about him, why should you care?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Thanks for your response girl, I really appreciate your comment. And you're right.

      As far as if the roles were reversed, I mean. I'd find it off-putting in general that a man like him would be wearing make up. If I were a guy or a lesbian girl with a girlfried who wore make up to cover her flaws, if I truly cared about her it wouldn't bother me. Plus, I love the person he is. Yes, his looks played a big role in that but at the same time, he's beautiful inside and out.

      Don't get me wrong, I'm very pretty with or without make up. That's why I feel as though it's not really misleading. Some women cake the make up on to change their features, example, applying blush or something to give the illusion that she has high cheek bones or applying eye liner in such a way to create big eyes (? I really don't know much about make up at all. Ironic, huh?). To me, that's misleading. I look the same without make up just with some spots on my face because all I use is concealer. I look at it like this, "this is what I'd look like if my skin was blemish free". Doesn't everyone want to look and feel their best?

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      • worriedgirlhere
        10 years ago

        Exactly! I don't see it being bad that way either. I don't use mascara, blush, bronzer, etc.
        Partly because I'm too lazy, and the other part being that I just think it's too much.
        I mean, when I feel like it, I'll put on a little nude colored eye shadow, very thin eyeliner...but that's pretty much it. But you know, it freshens me and I feel a tad bit better...but I'm not completely altering my look.

        The quote "this is what I'd look like if my skin was blemish free" is how I see it too! Going out in public, you want to look presentable. Whether it be dressing appropriately, fixing your hair, brushing your teeth (which is something everyone SHOULD do lol), etc. I find that applying makeup is a way for me to look presentable.

        From what I am hearing on your condition, you will be fine. If he does care about you, then things will be fine!

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  • NeuroNeptunian
    10 years ago

    Just show him, I rarely ever see women who wear makeup that is so fucking heavy that their flaws are absolutely invisible.

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  • myboyfriendsbitch
    10 years ago

    I don't think your makeup is hiding your blemishes as much as you think. Bumps are visible even under layers of foundation, so I'm sure he knows. Unless you have some really badass makeup.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      Like I stated above, it doesn't hide the initial break outs where the skin is still raised. It hides the post marks.

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  • dom180
    10 years ago

    You are way too insecure. You don't need to look absolutely perfect, and any guy who would think negatively of you because your make up smudged is a total weirdo. I'm sure he knows you wear make up already - he's not stupid, so I don't know why you're placing so much emphasis on this "big reveal". There's nothing deceptive about wearing make up, but it doesn't make me comfortable to know that you don't seem to mind deceiving him.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      10 years ago

      I don't want to deceive him, I just want to remain beautiful in his eyes and though he isn't shallow, I feel like seeing me without make up could jeopardize that if he hasn't fallen for me yet.

      I appreciate your comment.

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  • GoraIntoDesiGals
    10 years ago

    "Because once you're in love, looks are only an added bonus."

    That's a fallacy. We only fall in "love" with people we find attractive in the first place.

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  • Nokiot9
    8 years ago

    If he gets upset because ur makeup gets messed up while ur doing it, then he is a whiny freakin loser that u shouldn't let between ur legs in the first place. Someone that obsessed with physical perfection has a complex that won't do your relationship any favors.

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  • [Old Memory]
    10 years ago

    Yes, it is misleading, as much as people hate to say it is, it is.

    Anything that involves covering the actual image or truth, be it physical or not, is misleading the people that see it.

    Make up is not your face, you don't look like that, and by making it seem better than it is, you are misleading people.

    I'm not saying you are unattractive (you may be), but women tend to look better with make up, and you won't always be wearing that.

    I think it is rather sly to sit there and try get him to love you, then show all your flaws. That is sly in my books.
    Imagine he done that to you, because the only thing you seemed to mention about him was his flawless appearance. Imagine it turning out he was wearing make up, and he wasn't nearly as attractive as you thought he was? I have a feeling you would reconsider the relationship.

    Yes, make up is misleading, ofcourse it is, you are covering your face to get rid of your flaws.
    Will he like you without the make up? Who knows. Probably.

    Personally, I would leave you if I was him and figured out you were basically trying to trap him emotionally and "then" show him your flaws and your actual appearance.

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    • Sanara
      2 years ago

      I actually kinda agree with you. Don't get why you get so many downvotes. I can still get why people do actually try to look better than they truly look, but it is dishonest one some level. On the other hand people might be more accepting of flaws when they have already formed some bond and experienced your good sides too.

      I dont think apppearence is like super important, but if it was completely unimportant nobody would wear makeup in the first place. And it is important in my opinion to have some level of physical attracting in a physically intimate kind of relationship, or it would just not feel right

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  • RomeoDeMontague
    10 years ago

    YES

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